Thanks for the replies. However I am doubtful it is any of the ones mentioned. Definitely not an iceplant which at least has foliage year round. I might be wrong and maybe it is a type of poppy after all, but I don't think it is the California poppy which seem to be bigger and flowers way longer. The flower shape seems to be more like a poppy than a daisy (but I must say I have terrible vision). I will try and get a picture if I can. Some patches are pure (yellow or orange only) but you can always see mixed patches in the same vicinity. The flowers are very dense and its almost hard to notice the foliage.

I've had cats all my life, too, and I currently have five. Even tho it's been a year for Amy, and that seems like a long time, given all that's happened in her little life, as well as in the other cats' lives, I'd just give it more time and I think they'll work it out. One of my cats, a rescue, that I've had for years, is still making progress in not being scared and being around everyone. A couple of my cats still spit spat from time to time. I yell "NO" to them also, and they get it. Another cat that I adopted is a big male that was my neighbors' cat. Before I adopted him, he used to come over and chase my girls (other four cats) around. Even after many years, he still occasionally chases the littlest girl sometimes; but for the most part, he's stopped chasing. I brought two dogs into the household two years ago, and I still see the relationships b/t the dogs and the cats evolving. Even with my pigs (yes, I have potbellies), their relationship seemed to evolve into a more friendly one over time. IMHO, animals, like us, have different personalities and, therefore, interact differently at different times, depending on their moods, energy levels, etc. That's one of the things I like about having multiple cats, is that they hang out with each other at different times. It's been really interesting to see their relationships develop. Cali may be trying to assert herself as dominant, and once she feels that's accomplished, back off a bit. There still may be some jealousy involved. Amy is still very young. I think that they all have to understand that YOU are the boss and you are the dominant one. I really like Lukki's idea above. If it is a territorial issue, they will see that you are in control, not them. Good luck, Betsy

Pennylane-- I don't want to be guilty of encouraging you to flout the advice of your counselor (who is a professional, and I of course am not), but I would encourage you to discuss with him the idea of you dealing with SD directly when it comes to the more vague issues of "attitude" and "respect". With appropriate assertiveness (not passiveness or aggressiveness) and without meting out "punishments" per se, but more of a *discussion* with her. Run it by him and see if he might reconsider his advice somewhat. I say this, again, not because I am in a position to have an "expert" opinion on blended families, but because I am a stepdaughter, and one common thread among other stepchildren I know is that the SP/SK relationship is made so much worse when it is perceived that one or more parties is being "manipulative" or is untrustworthy, and this perception results from an INDIRECT approach. Whether it's the SK or the SP doing it, it spells the beginning of the end for a decent relationship. You don't want to risk creating an impression to your SD that you are two-faced, passive-aggressive or are "hiding behind" your DH and expecting him to fix all of your interpersonal problems (including the one with SD) for you. Aside from eroding trust and encouraging similarly indirect behavior on SD's part, I dare say it also undermines the very thing you seek to improve in the situation: her respect for you. I can honestly say that the number one factor that has made me fully give up on having any sense of respect for my SM or any desire to "work with her" is exactly this sort of thing. If she had had the guts to actually TELL ME if/when something I did/said/was upset her, instead of resorting to the little digs (with a big grin) she felt were her only permitted recourse to express her displeasure with me, I would have seen her as not only a person worth respecting but also as an honest human being who I'd WANT to be close to. It was very hard for me to see her as a fully-formed ADULT WOMAN when she was constantly "tattling" to my Dad about whatever her grievances were. Moreover, in her case she drastically distorted the things she relayed to him which painted me in the worst possible light, and since these things were never discussed with ME directly, I had no chance to explain (or in certain cases just plain CORRECT) some of the misperceptions, so it was pretty much impossible to see her as trustworthy or as an agent of anything other than discord in my relationship with my father. Therefore, she never earned my genuine respect, nor my desire to "work with her" even though her tantrums to MY DAD made it so I was terrified for years to do or say anything to upset the apple cart. So she got her surface compliance out of my stuffing myself for years, but it certainly didn't improve ---and in fact severely worsened--- anything deeper between us than the shallowest "hi, how's it going"/"oh, fine..." And I dare say I don't think it helped her relationship with my Dad. For several reasons, but one of them being that expecting him to "fix" something that is so inherently vague and emotional and open to perception as "attitude" and "respect" is pretty much impossible, and no one knows this more than the bio-parent in the middle. It's one thing to have clear rules/consequences for clear actions or infractions. For example, an eye-roll is clear enough to be called out ***IF HE SEES IT HAPPEN***... But the problem comes in when/if it happens when he is not around, due to the underlying distrust and disrespect which will be made no better by the "hiding behind DH" approach. Please at least run this by your counselor. I'm not a professional, but I did experience this from the other side, and I think if you ask other adult SK's on here they'll agree with me.

You probably know that a BS or BA takes four years in the US, and sometimes five if the college is overcrowded and classes are hard to get, but that is because you must take a certain number of classes outside your major - liberal arts if you are a tech/science major, or math and science if you are a liberal arts person. It is considered that this will help to make you a well-rounded member of society. To some extent, I think it is true. We are also seeing the rise of the master's degree as the standard of a well educated person. My husband, one daughter, and I all have one, as does my brother. It has become fairly common. My other daughter has two bachelor's degrees (career change), and my non-academic son completed a certificate program at a community college. It is unusual for anyone to stop at high school and expect much of a career, very different from a generation ago. And a generation before that, my grandfather stopped at eighth grade, which was considered perfectly adequate. He was educated in Canada where he grew up, but the same was true in the United States. (I do want to add a side comment here. It is my personal belief that a person who did not go beyond high school but continues to read all his life long is apt to be a far better educated person than someone who gets a degree but never opens another book for the rest of his life.) Equal pay is an iffy thing, addressed differently in different places. In areas where the cost of living is higher, pay also tends to be higher, the Boston-NYC-Washington corridor being one region with a notoriously high cost of living. Hawaii is also a very expensive place to live, and Los Angeles and the Bay Area (including Silicon Valley) is just as expensive. Government job pay scales are mandated by regulation, and union jobs by contract. The business sector is free to pay what the market will bear. There is a set federal minimum wage, though some areas have set their own higher minimum wage, much disputed by business which says that it will mean higher unemployment or the failure of small businesses. As for pay for women, in my area the pay ranges can be different for two reasons (at least). One is that pay is generally negotiated, and women tend to be less assertive in asking for more money, more inclined to wait until their value is recognized and spontaneously rewarded. The other is that if there are children involved, mothers are employed full time are more likely to work only 40-50 hours a week (I did) while fathers feel free to stay at the office 50-60 or more hours. Long hours are highly valued here in Silicon Valley, and they do tend to be financially rewarded. Then there is the fact, still true, that many women choose traditional female careers (teaching, nursing, library work) where pay lags unless there is a union to increase it. Stop me before I go on even longer! I keep coming back to edit typos and explain more and more.