It is good that there are multiple members that really know their stuff in the forums. Especially since some forums contain a few people that actively post nonsense as factual. Not so good when forums are very limited and restricted, such as the single company "allowed" to give landscape design input. And fasten your seatbelt and have a working air bag prior to saying you don't want to encourage the weeds in your garden so you can harvest and eat them in Name That Plant. Even KT has some buttons with predictable results when pushed. Not so evident here as some other forums though.

Self important keyboard warriors, cliques, self proclaimed experts, etc are just part of the internet experience. I just figure a lot of these people lead sad little lives that they are trying to compensate for online. It's their safe place. LOL

On the flip side are those who don't want their beliefs challenged ever. If someone posts factual info on one of their threads or postings then they project on them and call them know-it-alls or bullies. Same coin, different side.

ohhh - you need to try hot topics. Although, for some reason, there seems to be a few rather harsh comments about the Cooking forum today and yesterday. I don't frequent it so I don't know how valid they are.

Oh, I've been to Hot Topics a time or two. That is not a happy place for me, so I don't hang out there. Seems like a lot of regulars trying to out scream each other.

Yes, and they also try to call out the few that disagree to chide them into an argument.

On the kitchen forum, I was made fun of for suggesting a high CFM fan for a commercial stove top. On the bathroom forum a Pro made fun of me for thinking "I" did professional quality tile work, then deleted his comments. On the decorating forum there's this broke dude that does antique decorating on the cheap, used to rule the place, can't stand ANY of his suggestions. So YES, I've had THAT experience everywhere on these forums. KT was no exception. One person had a double Id. She'd start trouble w/ one ID and try to fix it with the other one. PC signatures are traceable & she got caught.

I have found these forums VERY useful. That's why I stay. But a group did leave & start their own. Called it Meeting House.

Seems like a lot of regulars trying to out scream each other.

It is true that many there are extremely outspoken. Sometimes, I am so outraged at an event (the election, for instance) that I go in there and take an opportunity to be outspoken myself. I'm not sure how often a true dialogue is initiated where each side appreciates and considers the point of view they don't agree with, though.

But the place is voluntary and clearly labelled so one knows what to expect.

One person had a double Id. She'd start trouble w/ one ID and try to fix it with the other one.

That is both sad and funny.

Uh oh, PK, I am one of those bitching about those using common names for plants. I was wanting a plant and saw one CL, a "spider plant". I made a bee line, a long bee line to the seller and it turns out it wasn't what I wanted. If was looking for hymenocallis and person was selling a crinum. He did have a pic but both have strapped foliage so....I was not pleased and seller was confused at my reaction.

btw, i don't see the changes people are posting about.

There are cliques in every single office, organization, church/synagogue. It's Life 101. If one can't navigate it without getting ones feelings hurt, one is going to live a rather reclusive life. So what if someone tells you you're wrong? Are they coming to your house and removing your plants/stove/sofa?

I've spent a lot of time on the Kitchen forum for the past 2 years - joined when I was contemplating a new kitchen. I've never seen anyone told that they don't need an especially powerful hood if using a commercial-type range. In fact, they obsess over this! And they obsess over the "make-up air" thing (no one ever told me I needed this when I installed a 600CFM hood several years ago and it works just fine).

Yes, there are people with a lot of very strong opinions - that includes ME! But no one forces you to read these opinions of follow them. Most people who have them also have a lot of experience so perhaps at least listening might be beneficial? Then do what you want - it's a free country.

Oh wow Anglio, that was a strong opinion. I am reclusive and that works for me. Please note that my topic wasn't really a whine, more of an observation. Did it come off as 'the bullies are picking on me'?

Bossyvossy, I had to google to see both of the plants you were talking about. Neither are what I call a spider plant. This is a spider plant to me:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chlorophytum_comosum

PK, I totally agree with what you said. I think you stated it just fine.

@S_7bAL. Exactly! Strongest argument for Not using common names. When you do, you can't say your plant is the "correct" spider plant and the other "person's" is the "wrong" spider plant.

ETA: not suggesting a person memorize botanical name for every single plant in Nature but once one has decided which are their favorites, they should know what the botanical name is for such favorites. Just a good practice, not written in blood anywhere nor a prerequisite for being a plant snob.

Hmm, I for one am glad that the different forums have folks that know and understand the subject matter....For instance in the Antiques forum where would people get answers if it wasn't for Linda and a few others with their great knowledge..or cooking, bathrooms ect ect

I'm not sure expert is the right term. I think its just folks that share their great knowledge of a perticular subject. Its only when those folks act like some sort of God and make others feel small or act as though someone put stupid in the dictionary because they ask a question or made a comment.

Bossy was making a very good point for using scientific nomenclature for plants instead of common names. People from all over the world visit the garden forums, so it can get pretty confusing.

I would like to put a good word in for many true experts who voluntarily educate, solve problems, and offer solutions. A very few come across as little dictators and end up offending the people who have come to the forums for information; a handful come to my mind right away. (I have threatened to pinch a few heads off over the years, hahaha, but it doesn't seem to reform their evil ways.)

I hate that people feel offended sometimes. I suggest that you (collectively) pipe up and politely say something the next time, if you haven't already. But don't let the behavior of a very few ruin your enjoyment or prevent you from returning to a forum. That's awful.

It's the experts that tell you , "YOU CAN'T DO WHAT I DO"....and are NO help at all. It's THOSE experts that I'm talking about.

You see, I wasn't asking for help, I was asking what a pro charged to do what I do. In the case of the tile work I posted photos, it must have passed to have angered this one guy.

Not only can you do what they do Nicole, you care and can do it better than they do.

rob...thank you! I was feeling a little put out when I did that last job for a friend. Her DH kept telling me I was too slow. lol It had a thousand tiny mosiac cuts. I wondered if I was charging how much I'd saved them. It was interesting when several pros gave pricing.

I learn a lot from these various forums. What bothers me are the "experts" that feel the only way to do something is their way and only their opinion counts as everyone else is wrong.

Seen this somewhere long ago, thought it was funny.

definition of an expert....An ex is a "has been" and a spert is a "drip under pressure". Lol

I should mention a few more things. It's not necessarily that I was made to feel stupid or wrong, I see others (usually inexperienced in the particular topic) that have their comments shredded by the self-appointed experts and feel empathy for them.

I started this thread after looking for and not finding an old post from the Ponds and Aquatic Plants GW forum several years ago that really stuck with me. The poster was a biologist that was very generous with his time and knowledge and that forum was lucky to have him. He had a lot of experience and understood water quality issues that typical water gardening enthusiasts encounter while pursuing their hobby.

Another poster, a woman was in tears at the advice given by the forum 'expert' that she 'must' tear her pond out and install bottom drains or her 12,000-gallon pond would become a cesspool. This modification was beyond her budget and since she'd been told by the resident self-appointed expert (not the real expert, the biologist) that she was killing her koi by not following this advice, she was looking for people to adopt her mature koi and she was on verge of shutting down the pond. She had been maintaining this huge pond in her yard for 20+ years and it had always been healthy, no fish kills or water quality issues and it brought her a great deal of happiness. She merely posted asking for advice about an extended suspended algae or green water issue and foam from DOCs.

The biologist came to her rescue with an alternate treatment that did not require ripping out the pond and starting over. There was a huge pissing match between the 'forum expert' and this actual expert about the fact that all ponds must have bottom drains. In the end, the pond hobbyist cleared her pond water using a low tech solution suggested by the biologist allowing her to keep her pond (and happy place).

The biologist posted a couple of weeks later about the forums often having self-appointed experts that offered the same tired advice over and over. His words were a work of art and I wish I could find that post.

Bossyvossy, I am right there with you on spider lilies. I must have 5 different plants that were passed to me as 'spider lilies'. Some are hymenocallis, some crinum, some lycoris and even a cleome! Proper plant nomenclature is important, I do agree. I just wish that these experts could be a bit more diplomatic when speaking to inexperienced horticulturalists. I just don't think that it's a good practice to shame someone else just to be 'right'.

I tend to read and try to comprehend ;) what the question or comment is (in whatever part of the forum it's posted, even here at the kitchen table). Sometimes, those who reply just want to hear themselves talk, I think, without paying attention to what's wanted or needed...

Over in the houzz side, sometimes, folks want to know where to hang a painting. Within minutes their entire house is torn apart by the "pros" pointing out everything that (in their eyes) is "wrong"...A lot of the time the things they say are simply a matter of preference. Like, "you need gray walls and neutral pillows and blah blah blah". Posters just seem to gravitate to the "pro" label even though the results are, at best, dull and predictable.

Perhaps people are wanting dull and predictable, but I think it's more that they're TOLD that's what they want....

Anyway...I agree and think that sometimes people forget that there's a human on the other side of the screen. Just because you have your own opinion doesn't mean everyone else's is wrong. And why wouldn't you be kind? THIS I don't get....

I like the "ex-pert" thing!!

o j

I used to post on a watergardening forum...not the one at GW, and I answered people's questions for years...often the same questions, over and over. I also raised goldfish and koi for about 50 years. I joined a local koi club and I have never met so many people with their heads so far up their behinds in all my years. I mostly kept quiet but their hoity-toity attitudes wore on me before too long and I left. I started raising fish before some of these people were born. I didn't do it commercially but I did it in a big way for a hobbyist. I had six large mud bottom ponds. You have to raise a lot of koi to select really nice ones. I did this by myself for many years and I didn't need anyone to keep on doing it. I no longer have koi....I lost my last ones in the flood, but I was working on a little project. I was putting together a collection of very nice looking koi and my criteria was to not spend more than $10 per fish. Of course, I wouldn't be able to brag about my $2500 fish that was imported from Japan, but these people didn't know that most likely their fish were spawned in California anyway.

I raised fancy goldfish for many years....orandas and telescopes, mostly, but had 16 varieties. I am obsessive compulsive (who knew?). I also showed them as far away as Ohio. I miss it. It was one of the most enjoyable hobbies I have ever had. I plan to get some more koi and some goldfish and start over. I will never do it to the extent I did, but this is the first time in over 50 years I haven't had fish, and I miss them.

Marilyn, I think that I first 'met' you on a ponding forum, but I cannot remember which one.

We really are going to build a nice pond this winter, I swear! We've had the materials for 4 years now, just need to overcome all of hubby's plans and obstacles and get it done. We'll have regular goldies though. Our single experience with a koi that a neighbor slipped into our pond was bad. It tried chasing our largest goldie (a 6" beauty, gold and white) and managed somehow to dislodge a large stone crushing both to death.

It was called Watergardening (I think). What name did you post under? I got in a forum fight with someone over drowning a possum. They caught it in a live trap and drowned it in their pond. I didn't say anything about it for a long time....this was years before I started rehabbing possums....it just irked me that she told about it and laughed about it and no one said anything to her about it. Finally after she told it three times....as if we had missed it the first two times....I said, "I'd appreciate it if I didn't have to read this again" and the she-it hit the fan! That was when Carolyn from Sask told me about KT and I joined....1999, but I ended up going back to watergardening and answered questions there for as long as the forum lasted. I also mailed out literally hundreds of waterlilies to people all over the country, Canada, and Puerto Rico.

I used to have 200 varieties of waterlilies. I don't know where I got the energy...I guess being young helped with that.

Anyone know whatever happened to Carolyn from Sask?

If I didn't post under pkponder, I used Pam in Texas. I must have missed that possum killer. I left with the Newt posse after some sort of dust up between Newt and the owner of that Watergardening forum. I was a member of JB's forum too. I remember you sending waterlilies out to people. I don't know what happened to Carolyn from Sask. My memories are hazy.

On another forum I frequent (not GW), I wouldn't say there are "experts" - more like self-appointed "keepers" of the forums. One is particularly known for reviving old threads (especially hers) to keep them alive. Last year, she posted a thread saying how she wasn't going to be posting much any more due to all the terrible stuff going on in the world and that there were much more important things than forum talk. People more or less posted on the thread 'so sorry about that, but do what you need to do'. The retreat lasted approximately two weeks before they started posting again, reviving old threads. Don't get me wrong, I think she's a fine contributor, but maybe there's a need for attention there?

That's what many of the internet-active agencies are doing - going for our "attention".

It's marketable, you know.

I heard a radio program the other day that was wondering whether the huge presence of the "GAFA" group (Google, Apple, Facebook and Amazon) ...

...were putting democracy at risk.

ole joyful

OMG I'm GAFA, LOL! And seriously, I think the answer appears to be yes :-(