Francisco de Quevedo Quotes
Spanish - Writer September 17, 1580 - September 8, 1645

We all wish to reach a ripe old age, but none of us are prepared to admit that we are already there.
Francisco de Quevedo

In short, not only are things not what they seem, they are not even what they are called!
Francisco de Quevedo


Marquis de Condorcet Quotes
French - Philosopher September 17, 1743 - March 28, 1794


Enjoy your own life without comparing it with that of another.
Marquis de Condorcet

I hope to see the bringing together of all the best educated people of the earth into a worldwide Congress of Scientists.
Marquis de Condorcet


Edgar Mitchell Quotes
American - Astronaut Born: September 17, 1930

The best experience that we have on Earth is the fact that we have scientific stations, weathering over stations down in the Antarctic for almost the entire 20th century to learn how to exist in exceedingly hazardous conditions; and the Moon is far more hazardous than Antarctica. At least they have water there.
Edgar Mitchell

You develop an instant global consciousness, a people orientation, an intense dissatisfaction with the state of the world, and a compulsion to do something about it. From out there on the moon, international politics looks so petty.
Edgar Mitchell

I happen to be privileged enough to be in on the fact that we have been visited on this planet, and the UFO phenomenon is real.
Edgar Mitchell

I theorize that there is a spectrum of consciousness available to human beings. At one end is material consciousness. At the other end is what we call 'field' consciousness, where a person is at one with the universe, perceiving the universe. Just by looking at our planet on the way back, I saw or felt a field consciousness state.
Edgar Mitchell

Our mission on Apollo 14 was to be the first to do science on the moon, so we had to be careful about getting everything in during the allotted time.
Edgar Mitchell

I don't think there is much value in trying to use the moon as a base to go to Mars. That's going into one gravity belt and having to get back out of it again. And the moon doesn't have a lot to offer as a resource base.
Edgar Mitchell

We do need different types of propulsion to get to Mars. I wrote one of the first Ph.D. theses on that in the 1960s.
Edgar Mitchell

We need a community of nations capable of space flight because we all have to be off this planet sometime in the future. Our sun is going to burn out eventually, and we are not in a sustainable situation.
Edgar Mitchell

My wife tells me I am a male chauvinist pig and I have to sort of admit it. In my office and in my home, I'm not very democratic. I think of myself as a benevolent dictator.
Edgar Mitchell

Death may simply be an alteration in consciousness, a transition for continued life in a nonmaterial form.
Edgar Mitchell

We should be ready to reach out beyond our planet and beyond our solar system to find out what is really going on out there.
Edgar Mitchell

At the end of October 4 in 1957, when I was coming back from sea duty in the South Pacific, Sputnik went up. I realized that humans would be right behind robot aircraft or spacecraft even though I really had no plans of being in aviation or a professional aviator and certainly not in the military.
Edgar Mitchell

I had studied at Harvard and MIT astronomy and a lot about the heavens and the star system and so forth.
Edgar Mitchell


Rita Rudner Quotes
American - Comedian Born: September 17, 1955

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Rita Rudner

It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Rita Rudner

Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.
Rita Rudner

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
Rita Rudner

I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.
Rita Rudner

To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'
Rita Rudner

I'm a very simple person. I'm very shallow. Shallow, simple, easily pleased: that's me.
Rita Rudner

Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
Rita Rudner

My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.
Rita Rudner

Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?'
Rita Rudner

I love to write jokes and that's all I think about.
Rita Rudner

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.
Rita Rudner

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives.
Rita Rudner

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
Rita Rudner

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
Rita Rudner

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
Rita Rudner

I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.
Rita Rudner

The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down.
Rita Rudner

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
Rita Rudner

My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping.
Rita Rudner

I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine.
Rita Rudner

I get a lot of return business. I think it's all those years I put in traveling around the country; people saw me before and had a good time so they want to see me again.
Rita Rudner

While I do occasionally order items on the Internet, it's hard to teach an old shopper new tricks. I'm convinced that the catalogue will eventually disappear, but not until the last baby boomers have kicked off their smelly Nikes and been buried in mulch.
Rita Rudner

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.
Rita Rudner

I don't like when there's too much conversation because I'm shy and it makes me uncomfortable.
Rita Rudner

On my tombstone it will say: 'I tried everything - nothing was easy.'
Rita Rudner

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
Rita Rudner

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
Rita Rudner

Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them.
Rita Rudner

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.
Rita Rudner

I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.
Rita Rudner

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.
Rita Rudner

My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.
Rita Rudner

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.
Rita Rudner

I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose.
Rita Rudner

Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.
Rita Rudner

Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before.
Rita Rudner

A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax.
Rita Rudner

It wasn't that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one would tell me where it was.
Rita Rudner

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them.
Rita Rudner

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when they have one.
Rita Rudner

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him.
Rita Rudner

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.
Rita Rudner

I suffer from peroxide phobia. Every time I've gotten near a blond woman, something of mine has disappeared. Jobs, boyfriends... one time an angora sweater leaped right off my body.
Rita Rudner

I get so happy when I write a joke. It's a very satisfying, liberating feeling.
Rita Rudner

If I say a joke and the audience laughs it makes me feel good.
Rita Rudner

I just love dogs, and there really is no better companion than an animal.
Rita Rudner

The logic was, there weren't too many female comedians, so I thought I might as well try a field that had fewer competitors than the field I was in, which was acting, singing and dancing.
Rita Rudner

I started taking ballet lessons when I was 4, and I was performing in ballet companies when I was 10, and I did summer stock in Miami Beach when I was 12, and finally I said, 'I gotta go to Broadway.'
Rita Rudner

I had no desire to be a stand-up comic until I decided to do it.
Rita Rudner

There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.
Rita Rudner

My Vegas act is how I make my money.
Rita Rudner

When you're a dancer, you start with the basics. You don't all of a sudden do a grand jete and pirouette. You start with first position, second, third.
Rita Rudner

My mother's mother is a very tough cookie. She buried three husbands. Two of them were just napping.
Rita Rudner

I don't want to push the envelope. Let the envelope stay in the middle of the table. I'll just make you laugh.
Rita Rudner

I think the most important thing about learning comedy is to start from who you are. If you begin the process by imitating what you perceive to be a comedy rhythm, you will get laughs sooner, but you will not be unique.
Rita Rudner

Being a dancer and a singer gave me some advantage with regards to having a stage presence. I always take my timing from the audience because they are half of my act.
Rita Rudner

Every audience has a personality. Some of them don't have the best personalities, but you're on a date with them for an hour and a half, so you just make the best of it.
Rita Rudner

I don't do Jewish stuff because I don't want people to be left out. If I mention the Torah in Alabama, it's not going to go down that well. I used to do some Jewish jokes because when I started, I used to play lots of Jewish country clubs.
Rita Rudner

I have to visualise my jokes, live my jokes, feel the audience because every audience is different. It's like having a different dancing partner every night.
Rita Rudner

I have no organisational skills. All my energy goes into worry - worrying takes a lot of energy.
Rita Rudner

If you are who you are on stage, people pay attention.
Rita Rudner

I wanted to say things that were natural coming from me.
Rita Rudner

I found out I had a real love for comedy and comedy writing. The logic was, there weren't too many female comedians, so I thought I might as well try a field that had fewer competitors than the field I was in, which was acting, singing and dancing.
Rita Rudner

I have too many credit cards. You know what happened? Someone stole one and I didn't notice. I noticed when I got that bill. Whoa! It was so much less! I'm letting him keep it. I'm saving money!
Rita Rudner

I did six Broadway shows, and I noticed there weren't many female comedians. When I went to a dancing audition, there were 1,000 girls. And there were three jobs. So I said I'll just try comedy. And I loved it.
Rita Rudner

I had the worst birthday party ever when I was a child because my parents hired a pony to give rides. And these ponies are never in good health. But this one dropped dead. It just wasn't much fun after that. One kid would sit on him and the rest of us would drag him around.
Rita Rudner

Stand-up is my favorite thing I've ever done. There's so much independence.
Rita Rudner

You are always trying to please people before you get to the public whenever you do anything that requires a corporate body to sanction it.
Rita Rudner

I'm not a person who likes authority. I just love the fact that it's up to me, and I go straight to the audience.
Rita Rudner

Barbie ruined my life! It's a really bad image for women. For a long time I thought I was deformed - because my heels didn't touch the ground. I was walking around on tiptoes. What's up with that? I think that it's a bad thing for a woman to try to emulate.
Rita Rudner