Avoid the added ingredients. They won't help you achieve a professional result. Only quality tools and expertise can do that for you. Get the cabinets clean and dull and then follow up with the suggested paints above.

@Laura Holland Thanks so much for the update. I am very glad you found someone to do a post-catalyzed conversion varnish on your cabinetry. That's the standard for finish longevity. How utterly horrible that the contractors have already messed it up. Yes, repairs are very difficult with the 2-part coatings. They absolutely should have been much more cautious. It's somewhat hard to mar a 2-part finish, so they must have been really careless. It sounds like you may have gotten the satin finish of the INSL-X. I have heard the semi-gloss is significantly more durable. If you do have it re-done, I wouldn't go with any Benjamin Moore products again. Find someone who can do Milesi, Renner, or ICA-Ilva. All three of those would be superior, but they may need to be sprayed as most formulations from those companies dry fast, and the 2-part formulas provide the most hardness and chemical resistance. Many people have reported finish failures with Advance even with a Stix Primer. INSL-X is a step above Advance based on my research. In fact, INSL-X is actually made by the same people who make Stix. Benjamin Moore bought the company.

you're doing a lot of changes comparatively speaking of course..you plan to change some cabinetry and work with new color..you plan to choose new countertop, new backsplash i don't know about costs but I feel starting new will be easier..refacing plus creating new pieces sounds expensive. Countertops, backsplash-all that is disruption and money. If you wanted just to paint would be different story. It can be done of course..purchasing new pieces and all..it just won't be less headache. Or so I think. Can you leave the island as is? The cabinet part? That'd save a lot. as for priorites-right question. say was it me-I wouldn't even touch the kitchen (but I'm obviously less of a cook than you..so that matters too). I'd style it pretty and paint walls a different color and go to Kauai..and buy there an art in Hanapepe..:) But I think it seriosly bugs you probably if you consulted three different pros so choose the option that will allow you for the least headache, with most satisfaction in the end. "Headache" can be money or time or ..you know yourself. Yes, kitchens are usually popular on Craigslist, so selling is definitely an option. BTW granite is too. People buy everything.

If the wear on the cabinets is enough that they need refinishing, it could be as expensive as a good paint job. My mother was able to have a few damaged doors refinished very reasonably, but we live in an area where labor cost for that sort of job are lower. It also would depend on if the doors are solid wood or veneer - wood laminated over a mdf core. Veneers are hard to refinish. You could take a door down to a reputable paint store and ask for recommendation on who to call for an estimate and if the door was solid wood or a veneer. As I mentioned, I am not a paint the cabinets person - but I have painted cabinets that were worn - my original kitchen cabinet uppers - which I then put in my laundry room. That was 20 years ago and I am fine with them. They don't get much abuse in the laundry room though. I refinished the old kitchen lowers a couple of years ago (they had been stored in the garage) and used them in my basement kitchenette. I know how to do that and felt stained wood would stand up better since the kids use that space. If I was in your position, and I could not afford new doors, and I did not know how to refinish, I would paint. I would keep a bit of extra paint around for touch ups and be aware that this will NOT increase the value of the home. When you go to sell, you will have done your economical best to make a pretty kitchen, but the cabinets will be worn cabinets that have been painted. If they still look reasonably good, a buyer will see that they have a presentable kitchen and time to save for the needed new cabinets. While I agree with the painting steps listed above, your cabinets are not worth the royal treatment. I used two coats of a good bonding primer - Zinsser 123 - and two coats of a latex acrylic enamel. Since the time I painted my cabinets, they have come out with some good cabinet paints, and I would use one of those after the primer coats. Because of the wear, I would give the cabinets a good sanding to try to even out those areas. I simply brush painted my cabinets - I did not spray them. Some of the newer paints do a good job of self leveling. I would get handles for the cabinets - the less you touch paint with wet or sticky hands the better. Even the normal oils on skin can have an effect on paint and other finishes over time. I sometimes have had fun with older kitchens - get creative because it is hard to make things worse. I do not mean you have a bad kitchen, it is just the cabinets have reached the end of their life and I don't see you devaluing them by painting them:) I do imagine this space as warm and pretty rather than the gray / white look.