Mike, You pointed it out to me, but it wasn't you who convinced me to not trust manufacturer data, it was the data. In addition to the Sequence mistake I saw one in the Danner data too. That was a pretty small survey and I didn't look that close at the remaining material. So, yeah, looked pretty untrustworthy to me. I don't think manufacturers are doing this intentionally, just lack of caring on their part and also on the part of customers. Apparently few people are checking the data or care enough to complain. Most manufacturers don't even bother to provide any data and that sure doesn't seem to hurt sales. Seems like most people just go by the max watts and call it a day. If I had a way of knowing a manufacturer was understating or accurately stating performance I'd go with them too. And the way you figure which are and which aren't? Can only be from experience of using lots of pumps from lots of manufacturers and performing exact tests yourself on each, keeping careful records and then hope they don't change something the next time you buy a pump. Listen to some opinions online? I haven't been that impressed with opinions over the course of my life no matter the source so I have to pass on that. For me it can't really be both ways. Manufacturer data can't be suspect and also be used to make decisions. I'd feel like I'd be kidding myself. That's just me. I think I'll just go with the crowd and use the max watt and GPH too. Maybe at some point I'll test pumps myself and return pumps that don't perform as expected.

Rave, I feel for you! My father's mother was the same way with me and my brother and sister. Nothing to do with stepchildren or anything but our entire family! My dad has two sisters and a brother who all have children. They all have lived out of town since I before I was born. We were the only ones who stayed in the same town as Grandma. From the very beginning my Grandma would always tell us how wonderful her other kids and grandkids were. It never fails, if we are visiting her or even she comes over for our birthdays, all we hear about is her other wonderful grandkids!! Eventhough they rarely call and often years elapse between their visits! If we give her pictures of ourselves they get placed behind all the other grandkids so you can barely see them. For the life of me I will never understand what her problem is or why she doesn't seem to care about us. We always visited her despite her attitude and always helped her out around the house and yard. My parents are always over there fixing stuff for her and they never get any appreciation for it! My mom has always been very angry and upset over this treatment and has often complained to my father but you know how men are when it comes to their mothers!!! My dad is finally starting to get upset by her behavior, but it is kind of late considering I am 24, my brother is 29 and my sister is 34!! The damage is done. We will never have a relationship with this woman! My advice to you is however you do it, you need to talk to her soon! Your children are young now and they probably don't notice it, but they will grow up and it will hurt their feelings!!! Oh, when I was 15 or so my grandma bought my cousin sailing lessons for her birthday and my brother and I got $5 beach towels! Sweet eh? When my sister gave birth to her first daughter who was also the first great granddaughter, my grandma didn't come to see her for over 3 months until my uncle told her she should be ashamed of herself! She lives 5 minutes away from them. Thankfully my Grandma on my mom's side is the most wonderful caring woman in the entire world!

"but verbally I am finding he can be mean and yells at them unnecessarily" Remember this. He can be mean, and he yells at people he loves. With you, he may still be on his 'good behavior' -- but you can be sure he will revert to THIS behavior with you if you stay with him long enough. "So my question is, would I be wrong in speaking to him about this?" Wrong? No - But I'd suspect it would be pretty pointless if affecting a change is what you're after, and you'd be likely to get a pretty nasty response for your trouble. Might be worth a try, just to see if he's capable of recognizing the error of his ways. "I am starting to lose respect for him the more I see him overreact and I would hate to walk away from a great relationship because of that. " The first part of this sentence is so clear -- but the second part sucks! If he's verbally mean, the relationship is unlikely to stay 'great'. He's showing you a very valid reason for walking away. "One more thought about BF... his childhood was kinda lousy, mom died young, has an unemotional father and had to grow up fast having a kid when he was 18 in high school (among many other things)." I get it -- It's not his fault... Actually, my Ex had an almost identical back-story, and I cut him a lot of slack for that reason. But at the end of the day, the *reasons* for Ex's jerk-hood don't matter -- it's the unchanging, continued existence of the abusive behavior that's the problem. My current (wonderful) husband didn't have a decent father either -- but instead of repeating his own father's bad behavior, he set a higher standard for himself -- an idealized one, but one he constantly strives for. You've seen a *very valuable* glimpse into your BF's character. Please DON'T rationalize it away or excuse it into insignificance. If your goal is to 'get This Guy to marry you' -- then fine -- leave it alone. (Repent at leisure...) But if your goal is to someday enjoy a happy and loving marriage to a wonderful guy, then *remember* what you've seen, make a mental note that This Guy has 'Strike One' against being that Mr Wonderful, suggest a need for a change, and watch carefully for signs of *real* change before moving forward with this relationship.

When my husband and I married, I brought one young child into the marriage and he brought 3 older ones, although one left after eight months to go to university. We bought a 5 bedroom home together, 50/50. During the years that we were together, his two kids lived with us about 80% of the time, and my daughter was with us about 60% of the time. We split all the household costs, vacations etc. For several years, I made more money, so I bought most of the groceries and all the clothes for the entire family. I also paid for some of his kids' activities. When my income dropped below his, I asked him to contribute to the groceries, and take over the costs of his kids' clothes (although I still bought some). In retrospect, I am glad that we shared the house price 50/50 because a house is an investment that can be recovered. However, I do have some resentment over having paid a greater amount of the other costs. I could use that money now that I am separated to build a better life for myself and my daughter, and his kids aren't the least bit grateful for the wonderful life that they had when we were together. Of course, I'd probably feel differently if my husband had gotten his kids under control, and the marriage had survived.