She's stopped contributing on Garden Web. Both here and in the Cooking forum. Some people were commenting on her ideas of frugalness, and she had enough. I too miss her knowledge.

I turned to her with my questions about Kefir in the beginning and also how to use chia seeds. She uses both chia and flax seeds religiously.

If I recall correctly, she got upset about something someone said and left for good.

Yes, I think you're right Jasdip. I have to agree some of it was a little on the extreme side, but whatever works for each of us right?

That's really too bad. She was a wealth of information to many of us, too bad some with their opinions and choice of words had to mess it up for all of us.

Actually, again, if I recall correctly, no one had said anything mean spirited, more just along the lines of their own thoughts as in a conversation, she just took it personal and to a different level. A lot of people here mentioned that she was being ummm, over sensitive? She was not flexible about hearing other opinions.

Jasdip, if you are in touch with her, please let her know she is missed on KT. For every critical person there were many who enjoyed her posts. I, for one, appreciated her living style. It's easy to get hurt feelings here, sadly. Even someone who corrects another's grammar or spelling can make a person feel bad. My 2 cents.

And if she doesn't want to come back here please find out where she is and I will go there.

I don't post much, but will miss Grainlady's input.

Carol

As I recall, Grainlady is a teacher, and she is zealous about her frugality and lifestyle. Some readers will not get past what they perceive as a 'lecturing' tone, despite the knowledge imparted.

I too miss Grainlady, but I agree Chisue, sometimes she was a bit condescending.

Although I would never do the majority of what she talked about, I found her advise and knowledge very interesting.

Maybe she'll miss us and find her way back....

I didn't see the specific threads discussed. I have seen where grainlady has said something and people have been rude to her about it even though I thought her comments were neutral or intended to be helpful. I like grainlady's posts. They give me a different perspective. I enjoy that.

Sadly,Grainlady was/is a wealth of knowledge and some snooty whoever, just had to play the high school game instead of keeping their thoughts to themselves and scared her off.

Its' typical of a good lot that "used" to post here years ago-they're still around,they read daily but will not comment.

Then there are the ones that run to the admins and have threads deleted whenever they feel it was aimed at them(which,for the most part,they never are).

Its' too bad that most people can't just enjoy this site for what it is,instead of judging people.

If you are reading this Grainlady,come back whenever you choose to-I'm certain I speak for many that would welcome you with open arms!

It's too bad that a poster is scared off. I'm sorry for that. I think she was very knowledgeable and sincere in the advice she dispensed and it looks as though she is missed here.

I did not appreciate her writing style, so I just scrolled on by. Why can't everyone do that, rather than attack and complain?

Your a wealth of information Grainlady, if your reading this please do reconsider coming back. We are not all here to criticize, many of us are here to absorb information from others and get opinions.

I have also seen several people in different threads say something along the lines of I'm reporting you for spam...I thought to myself *spam? It wasn't spam it was someone disagreeing with you LOL*

We also have to remember we can't see body language, facial expressions, tones in voice..texting can sometimes be hard to decipher..feelings get hurt. That being said there are a few that always disagree which is fine, but disagree in a respectful way, not judgemental.

I really miss Grainlady, too. She offered very useful information, IMO. Would love to have her return to posting. If she does, whoever thinks unkind thoughts, please don't post whatever you are thinking.

I saw the threads and honestly didn't find any as ridicule, objectionable, judgmental, or snooty. Some people were just reacting to her suggestion of going through a bag of frozen mixed vegetables and separating every piece into separate packages for carrots, corn, whatever. I, for one, can't imagine doing that myself to save a few cents or for variety.

Grainlady is extremely knowledgeable and I, too, enjoyed her posts and took from them what worked for me. However, to "take your ball and go home" simply because a few people questioned (not ridiculed) the logic is a bit much and I don't have a lot of patience for that.

I'd love to have her come back (and I'd bet she's reading) - there was value in her posts and I learned from them.

Suzieque

I too miss her. I don't have to separate my vegetables for variety and to save a few cents but there are a lot of people who do have to do that very thing. Those kind of frugal suggestions can be important. i did like reading her healthy suggestions wrt to grains and now put ground flax seeds in my smoothies and in baking.

Frankly, I'm not surprised she left.

I don't think it's being snooty or rude or abusive to voice your own thoughts especially in a forum. Why should someone keep quiet just because they don't agree with the OP? How is that being snooty or abusive? I'm also alarmed by the idea that one must "shut up" and refrain from voicing their own thoughts or ideas just because the original poster is too "prickly". The forum isn't a dictatorship where one person is right and everyone else is wrong, we are all different in our views and opinions and IMO, the differences between us is what makes it interesting.

Sure, she offered a lot of information but it's not abuse for a poster to challenge her by saying they felt she carried it too far. Maybe she did and maybe she didn't but isn't that what conversation within a group environment all about?

I also don't recall seeing anyone be rude to her either; it was her choice to take it personally and leave. Maybe we all need to remember that with this format, the reader doesn't get the benefit of one's voice, facial expression or body language to help interpret the intent of the poster. One can "choose" to take what someone else offers defensively or non defensively. If Grainlady chose the later, then again, that was HER choice but I don't see how her response to opposing ideas should fall on a poster who was just trying to contribute a different idea. Also, chastising someone just because they posted an opposing idea is censorship.

Edited for grammer corrections.

I don't post a ton but have been here for years (15+?). I loved Grainlady's posts! I learned so much, and never found them condescending. I'm sorry some people did, as I'm sure that is not the way they were intended. She was supremely knowledgeable - an expert in her field - and I always thought she wrote with a "take what you want and leave the rest" attitude.

I also see nothing wrong with posting opinions or thoughts..that's what a forum is for..I only ment it should be done respectfully...but to sit back and not let your voice be heard because your thoughts might differ from others...how boring would that be not to mention unfair.

I always looked for her posts. She took a lot of time to post answers and share her knowledge. I miss her information and wish she would return.

I saw the threads and honestly didn't find any as ridicule, objectionable, judgmental, or snooty. Some people were just reacting to her suggestion of going through a bag of frozen mixed vegetables and separating every piece into separate packages for carrots, corn, whatever. I, for one, can't imagine doing that myself to save a few cents or for variety.

And that was it in a nutshell. She got upset and made a comment about others being elitist and then left.

http://ths.gardenweb.com/discussions/4028525/supermarket-frozen-vegetables?n=41

I just went back and read the thread Cindy just posted. I actually laughed out loud at some of the comments. But, I guess someone as serious as Grainlady could not see the humor in picking through peas and carrots.

Why I feel Grainlady could be condescending was because of a thread I once posted. I was excited to find mini jars of sea salt scrubs and thought they would make nice inexpensive Christmas gifts. My thread turned into how easy is was to make salt scrubs at a much lower cost that than the few dollars that mine actually cost.

It made me feel foolish to have posted the thread. How frivolous I was to actually buy salt scrubs and then talk about it here when I should have instead be sharing how to make salt scrubs!

So, it goes both ways. But, it didn't stop me from posting.

HERE'S the results of a search for Grainlady.

She is a wealth of valuable information; that she is no longer spending time here is very much our loss.

Edited to remark that a small handful of people had been targeting Grainlady for months....years. She was feeling that she couldn't participate at all, let alone answer any of the many questions asked of her.

I'm sure that she got to the point where "enough is enough", and I doubt very much that she is checking back to the Gardenweb Forums at all!

I loved being able to read very well thought out responses she gave. HIGHLY knowledgeable. I didn't make bread, but she made me feel confident enough (finally!) to try. Tell her I said hi if anyone talks to her

Maybe I just missed it but I never saw anyone targeting her. At first when this happened, I wrongfully assumed that someone must have been bullying her but when I did some investigating and read the thread in question, I found nothing that was hurtful. I seem to remember the person that was supposed to have been mean to her simply say something to the effect that they were very poor growing up and they never recalled having to sort through mixed vegetables. This is just recited from my own memory. In the end, it is her choice to leave and if she was not feeling enjoyment and pleasure posting then at that point, she should leave. I have myself stopped posting at discussion forums because it was no longer enjoyable.

Here is what i don't understand. We are all adults here. Most on the KT are 60 and up, so years of life experience.

For the most part, the majority here was very receptive to Grainlady. Why is it that a few nay sayers have all the power to ruin things for the rest of us?

I never found her condescending or higher than thou. In fact, she'd be asked the same questions over and over and patiently explained it every time. Like weighing the dough to fit in different sized loaf pans.

Separating the frozen veggies wouldn't bother me at all, to either do it, or if someone else did it. It sure takes up less room in the freezer, than having individual bags of veggies. Someone took it to another level when they suggested buying stew or something similar and separating it out. That was just plain snarky. And the one member who was always butting heads, was banned for a few years. She will pick on any and everyone at some point.

If I was at a dinner party with both affluent and less affluent people, I would never comment about time taken, etc. separating vegetables if it came up in conversation.

And I have strong opinions sometimes, and am not perfect, sometimes I have to remind myself that conversations are about sharing and giving, and they are not competitions.

If I'm not wrong the same nay sayers have targeted others on other threads.

Why is it that a few nay sayers have all the power to ruin things for the rest of us?

__________

Could be this isn't the only forum with which she was having to deal with nay sayers?

But she was explaining that she teaches frugal saving tips to seniors. It isn't something that even she would bring up at a dinner party.

I always marveled that she could keep all of her frozen food in the single freezer in the frig. She doesn't have a separate chest freezer. Neatly packaged in space-saving ways and organized. I often wish she'd post a video of her tips and knowledge.

I know she'd often remark that one of the highest priced items is dry cereal. It can be made for pennies yet the stores charge $4, $5 etc. for plain bran and corn flakes etc. She's called Grain Lady for a reason, and I'm not about to go and buy a mill to grind my own cereals and flour. But she did, and I certainly wouldn't fault her, or anyone for it. She also gets up at 3a.m. to do exercises with her husband before he sets off to work. Wow.

that was it in a nutshell

Considering the context, wouldn't it have been a husk?

How does anyone even know if someone was being "targeted" by a certain nefarious group of trouble-makers? I don't have time to dissect posts. Some people must have a lot of time on their hands.

These forums lost a wonderful resource when Grainlady quit posting. She was always articulate, knowledgeable and kind--one of my very favorite posters. If she is reading this, I hope that she will come back.

The cooking forum is pretty dead these days.

Actually seems like quite a few of the forums are dead lately. Maybe it's the holidays or people taking a break. I can name several posters whose absence is noticed and had posts I enjoyed a lot

I, too, enjoyed her posts. She was very knowledgeable & was happy to share her ideas.

I learned a lot from her, regarding bread making. Darn, sorry she left. She did have 5 times as much energy as me, though!

Maybe, in the New Year we can all think about having patience and being kind when we post our opposing opinions, knowing that a friend was doing the best they knew how to be informative. I miss her, as I miss others that have left due to 'mis-understandings'. I, too, sometimes speak out and am sure that my posts are causing a rift....and keep myself awake all night thinking how I might have treated the subject more kindly....so far, so good and perhaps some have just forgiven an addled old lady and strolled on by. Never the less, we are here at the table to get to know each other thru a medium that cannot truly appreciate the words people write....words are just funny that way....so we have to acknowledge that.....and use the "best of ourselves" to speak kindly, and remind ourselves there is a person we know on the other end of those words.

Many people are really looking for something different from what any particular, shall we say outlet may offer. And don't stay with it just for that reason. Plus now there are so many to choose from.

I was in awe of Grainlady's efforts and while I don't follow most of her practices, I was always interested in her posts.

I too like Grainlady, enjoy her posts, have learned from her, agree with her on a number of things but I also disagree with her on things. I consider Grainlady a friend and a wealth of knowledge. Perhaps I gave her a heart attack when I posted what an old gf used to do with a turkey! IDK. But I read the "vegetable" thread and don't see that she stormed off and said she was never coming back. Has someone actually talked to her and gained more info than what's being speculated here? Or is there another thread or something? Maybe I missed something. Maybe she did in another thread, IDK, and I haven't seen it. I also know that there's times she'd be gone a while and come back, as do a lot of people. She has a busy life.

But I've also noticed a change in her in her more recent posts and I guessed she had some stress in her life. She seemed a lot more sensitive than usual and seemed to me to overreact to comments at times which was so uncharacteristic of Grainlady. I recall one thread where there was a comment that was simply a different view and she was unusually upset by it and really, well, pounced like I've never seen from her. If she has troubled times for whatever reason I wish her well. I too miss her. But if she needs a break to take care of things in her life it's not up to us to comment like it's a funeral for her. She's an adult and will, and should, make up her own mind if and when she cares to participate. She knows she's welcome here.

Grainlady, I wish you well in whatever you do and decide and hope to see you posting soon.

What was it Theodore Geisel said?

Don't be sad it's over, be glad it happened.

Haven't heard that one before rob333. So applicable to so many situations.

I love Dr. Suess!

Rob, I used that in Mom's obituary........."Don't be sad that she's gone, be glad that she was here."