Alls I have to say Robin, is that I'm not picking apart anything you did. I'm just telling you that at my age, I've seen a lot where kids and divorces are concerned......not only as a family member of some, as a peace officer, as an employee of a Child protective service, and as a kid's nurse. I am just saying that you would never believe how twisted some things can get, when/if they end up with third parties having to step in. You cannot help another person's agenda......and it isn't always clear what the best action is when you are put on a spot. What I am saying is that it seldom is any benefit to do anything out of retribution and that you need to CYA in all your actions, evidently and do everything with a clear head and forethought. It might be very helpful to you down the line to keep a journal and document everything with times/dates/names. If your ex-partner is gaming with you, resist playing along if possible. What I have seen over the years is situations do not necessarily resolve automatically when divorces are final. They can get even grosser. How you deal with your ex now can impact tremendously what gets dished back at you down the line. That's why I mentioned sometimes it's best to keep your cards close to your breast at this point. There may be nothing at all you can do to work this out amicably........but it would be very sad if every time there is a visitation LF has to be in the middle. I have no answers or advice, really. It's just hard enough for a kid to have divorced parents without having to deal with issues. Even in 'easy' divorces, they have their plates full.

It seems this is one of many urban legends that make the rounds every now and then. Check out this link, and then browse the site. You'll be amazed at the information--or, more accurately, misinformation--that's floating around on the web and in e-mails. As if we don't have enough paranoia with Avian Flu warnings and terror alerts. Here is a link that might be useful: Break the Chain

Before you go critizing Jannie for her lack of responsibility for not planning ahead, try walking a mile in her shoes. See how you would feel with the poisons in your body that the kidneys automatically excrete. I don't know her circumstances but her husband may be handicapped, her daughter may not live near her....we don't know. How many neighbours would be up in the middle of the night and would be willing to shovel her out when she has to be at dialysis so early? Are there even neighbour's around her? Now how does one know in advance that there is going to be a snow storm so severe that you can't get out of your driveway because the snowplow has totally blocked you in? You may go to bed at night knowing it will snow during the night but it is anyone's guess how accurate weather forecasters are, how much snow there will be. Areas in the States that aren't used to snow have been bombarded with snow this year. Would Jannie even be well enough to shovel the snow feeling poorly needing dialysis? Where I live, police don't automatically come for rescue calls. You explain the circumstances to the 911 operator and they decide who is the best people to dispatch. If it is not an emergency you just call the police station/fire station which Jannie did. How was she to know in advance that the three taxi cabs she tried and the ambulette service wouldn't take her? She exhausted all of her options first. The police man could have been more help. If he wasn't called out on an emergency it wouldn't have killed him to offer some assistance. It would have been better helping Jannie, than spending time in a coffee shop or just sitting in his car waiting for a call. There are lots of times on a policeman's shift where they aren't doing anything. Yes policemen work hard, when they work, but they do have down times on their shifts as well. Since there are three taxi services where Jannie lives there would be a fair number of policemen as well. Jannie pays taxes and this was a one time emergency and not one that is a habit. Talking to the police chief at least sets a standard in case such a situation should arise with anyone in the future. It does not mean that it will go down on anyone's record. It would be interesting to know what was actually decided by the police chief, if a policy is now in place to help out in situations like this.

Normally, finedreams, I would agree with your reasoning, on a more 'generic' situation, but having only the two threads that have been presented, there is no reason to believe the sd is out on her own. Gentleman has stated that sd does not really 'live there', she's in school all week and on weekends is home long enough to make trouble and the remainer of it stays with relatives. Does not 'live' there, just hangs there passing in and out. Obviously the girl has places to stay. young adult at 19 who thinks it's okay to toss and destroy sf's belongings, call the cops on sf because she herself loses her things in her own mess and wants her sf arrested--unitl, giggle giggle, she finds the item under her bed-causes constant fights, and is totally disrespectful in her sf's home,is not a poor little miss me that I'd feel I had to tolerate. This is the sf's home, he brought the wife and stepdaughter into it and he's made it clear to wife, the adult girl either behaves or out she goes. The mother and stepdaughter has know it was coming to this. And yes, I have a 22 year old still at home. He has a choice. He can act like part of the family, be respectful to the others living in the home and our property, or he can rent his own apartment. He works fulltime and has since his jr year in HS, he bought his own car, pays own insurance for health (since 19) and his own car insurance ect.He also pays a small rent. The first time he pitched his father's belonging around the house, his father would be handing him the apartment listings from the paper. I have had adult children, a daughter-in-law also, on and off over the years for various reasons, never, ever, was such behavior allowed in my home. If poster would have stated the girl was to be out on the street/homeless blah blah, I might feel differently. But how far does a parent/step continue to enable adult children to destroy homelife before seeking solutions?