Before making this decision I suggest that you post pictures of your countertop and backsplash tiles over on the kitchen forum. The folks over there can help you insure that your choices are compatible and worthy of your splurge dollars. You could also just search over there for backsplash threads and see some examples of poor vs wonderful combinations.

You are worrying about one $400 overage? I actually commend you for staying within your budget. It's one of the hardest things to do.

Do you LOVE the tile that's over budget? If so, I say go for it as a reward for doing so well with the rest of the house.

How long do you plan to stay in the house? Five years? That works out to $6.67 a month over the five years.

Ten years? That works out to $3.34 a month.

This is your house. Your nest. Your place to come to after a hard day to relax and unwind. Do you want to unwind with stuff that is only so/so or something you love?

And FYI: I had to make the same choice. The quartzite I want is about as unusual as you can find and the price is enough to give one sticker shock. However, I justify it the same way as above in that I'm going to be looking at that gorgeous stone every single day and I know it will bring me joy to look at each day. I know that I will save elsewhere.

Junco-thank you for your advice! I have posted in the kitchen forum and though they all gave lovely and thoughtful advice, I was still torn with what to do. I am using a white quartz countertop and would like to do a marble backsplash. (And I know a lot folks don't like to mix real marble with faux marble, which I totally get, I'm a bit anxious about how it'll look in person as opposed to pictures). The debate I'm having is weather to use a 3x6 carrara subway tile or a much smaller 1x3 carrara tile in a herringbone pattern. Aesthetically, I prefer the variation and color in the smaller tile, but the 3x6 tile is cheaper!

For those interested in seeing my options, here they are! My countertop with the small herringbone calacutta tile and then the carrara 3x6 tile in someone else's home (they only had one sample 3x6 tile at the tile store, so I had to look online for other pictures of it with our hard to find countertop.)

Cpartist--thank you! It does seem reasonable when put that way!

If you can afford it now go ahead and get what you want. I ended up not getting what I really wanted on my cabinets due to higher price, and every time I go in the kitchen I kick myself for not going ahead and getting what I really wanted.

Finally, someone else like me!!! My husband and I have also agreed to sticking with a specific budget and for some reason a lot of folks take that as us not being able to afford the house we really want instead of seeing us as making smart choices as to where our money is best spent. It is really hard staying on budget so good job. :)

How much do you love the herringbone marble tile? Do you smile every time you see it? If so, I think you should go for it, especially since it's a very visible part of your house and you'll be looking at it multiple times per day. At a $400 upgrade price, it's also quite possibly the cheapest upgrade you can do for something that brings you so much joy.

We've gone back and forth on our kitchen counter since the only one I want is Caesarstone Bianco Drift quartz...I'd literally rather have laminate than have to choose a cheaper quartz or granite. We're talking a $2800 upgrade for that though so quite a bit more than your back splash! All in all, we're going to do it and make it work financially. Not having a counter that made me smile would make the whole kitchen a bummer to me.

$400 for house improvement? too cheap!

do it now or you would never stop regretting!

Have you checked thebuilderdepot.com? Their prices are hard to beat. Samples were lovely also. I say if you love it, splurge.

We're talking a $2800 upgrade for that though so quite a bit more than your back splash!

So over five years, that's $46.67 a month or the cost of one nice dinner out a month.

If it's over 10 years, that's $23.34 a month or the cost of movie tickets for you and your DH and a popcorn.

Maven- I agree with others here. If after a month of looking for alternatives, you are still dreaming of the herringbone, and you can afford it, go for it. I think it's gorgeous & a real "wow"!

If you're only overage is $400, go for it. On this forum, were used to a couple more zeros on that overage.

Spend a little more on the things that really matter to you, save on those things that are less important. You will see your backsplash every day, and it will continually inspire either joy or regret. Is there anything in your budget where you could cut back and not regret the difference? If not, I would say kudos for sticking to a flab-free budget -- you deserve this one small, well-spent overage.

We tried. To stay in budget also but there were a few things we were over budget on. $400.00 I would do it. As others have said, you will regret it later.

Go for it! I was bound and determined not to go over, too, but we decided to do so on several things (secondary HVAC-2 story house, basement fireplace-it was a high of 0 here yesterday, small overages to get the cabinets/countertop/backsplash I really want). I'm no help for your mission, though :) Really, though, find a way to cut $400 in extras out of your day to day expenses to justify it if you need to (don't cut $400 somewhere else in the house, unless it's a no brainer). Also, I like marble with quartz - I'm doing that, too.

I would also do it. I'm at the point in my life, where I deserve to have things around me in my home that I love. $400.00 doesn't make that much of a difference in your bottom line over the course of the many years that you will spend in this home. Make it beautiful, this is your one chance. It will be messy and difficult later if you decide to upgrade, and then the initial $ that you spent for tile that you don't love will have been wasted. How will you feel then?

A well prepared budget has a contingency line item and this is what it is for. Did you already spend it?

We did all our splurge spending during the design phase, so it was all written into the contract and I worked like heck to stay on budget. We changed nothing.

That said, 400 bucks in this process is really very little. Unless you are making these little splurge decisions every day! I would do it.

Should we splurge on the backsplash or should we stick to our guns and stay on budget???

Is this one of the few places in the build where you've overshot the budget ... or is it a pattern?

If you've been sticking to the budget well in other areas, and this backsplash is genuinely something that you want, $400 shouldn't break the bank. On the other hand, if you've been routinely wanting this or that item that wasn't budgeted, it's time to back off on the splurges.

Thanks all for the sound advice. I'm going to get what I love! We've not splurged in any other places (aside from two upgrades that we negotiated in the contract price). We do still have left the closet systems, which is a bit of an unknown and painting (we may have 1 additional color added that is not included).

maven, it sounds like you've made a wise decision in going with the tile you love. You certainly won't regret it when you see it every single day and smile. :) We're not even having our builder put a kitchen backsplash in because we don't want to pick one from the one store we get to choose from, so we'll be adding it ourselves after we move in and it will give me plenty of time to pick the perfect one.

I'd just add that you will not *always* be so focused on this and that detail of the house. One day you will look at some aspect and wonder what on earth made it SO important to you.

Do you have the option of NO backsplash until you get past this House Crazy part of your life? LOL (You may also discover something more vital to your enjoyment of the house after you live in it. Let me guess... It could be landscaping, or...)

If you have stayed on budget everywhere else, then splurge. I am the type of person who would let one detail like that affect me. It would drive me mad forever. I refused to compromise with my garage door because it's all about curb appeal. Lighting is swaying me in the "splurge" direction as well. And when I say this I only mean flush mounts in the bedrooms and the chandelier above the dining table. Otherwise my house is littered with recessed lighting. I did buy myself a glorious shower column but even then, they cost anywhere from $600+ for the one I got and I paid $450 for it on Amazon after reading a ton of reviews. I splurged, but I also saved. I stayed on budget with everything on my end. Our overages came solely from materials. (Lumber, well had to be drilled double the depth we were expecting etc.)

Just watched "Mr. Blandings Builds his Dream House" again last night. Should be required viewing for anyone contemplating building a house. Good entertainment while thinking about where or where not to go over budget.

Our budget was pretty soft, so we ended up going "over" a lot to get what we wanted. A couple years down the road I'm not sorry, we've got a very comfortable, very energy efficient house that's pleasing to live in. Doing it 30 years ago I would have had to be a lot more hard-nosed about sticking to a real budget.

The problem is, if you go on a forum where people are absolutely ga-ga about houses, then you're likely to get an echo chamber where people tell you to "go for it!" it's only to be expected. And there really isn't anything wrong with a splurge or two, as long as you can afford it and you really, really want it. However.

The building process is extremely emotional, and really deranges your rational thinking. It can be hard to separate things you really want, from things that are a temporary fixation. It's like trying to distinguish true love from overwhelming lust. When you are in the throes of the fixation, reason goes out the window. And there's lots of pressure, obviously.

So you buy the item. But sometimes, later on, you can wake up and realize, the "lusted for" thing is just not all that. Kind of the morning after. Buyer's remorse. So, what to do?

Lately, I've adopted a mantra I call, "I've got to have it or I'll die." Is this item so fabulous that it meets the "or I'll die" criterion, or is it a lesser sort of "want?" I find, very few things really meet the "or I'll die" level. (For me, it's cedar shingles.)

Another way to deal with it, is to equate the cost of the item with something else that you want, weigh the two, and see if you are willing to sacrifice one thing for the other. I call this "Paris days." Let's say each day in Paris costs me about $500. (I know that's cheap, just work with me here.) Then the item I want costs a certain number of "Paris days." If it's $1500, then that's three Paris days. If I price it out this way, the cost becomes much more concrete, and I can really see whether it has value to me compared to other ways I could be spending the money.

The bottom line (pun intended), is that only you can determine the value of these items to you-- it doesn't matter what others think, it's your money. It's easier to decide these by some internal process of your own, preferably in a calm state, away from showrooms, friends, family, the internet, and any other "influencers."

And don't worry about getting it perfect. Even the pros screw up. Good luck.

An excellent way of viewing it scone. I use that method but also the "what will it cost me if I stay in the home 5 years?)

I think it's awesome that you've stayed on budget! You should be proud of your self!

If it were me, I'd figure out the true cost (after all taxes, interest, etc. that would be paid on it,) and if it were still worth it to me I'd find that money elsewhere- either by culling something that I didn't feel as strongly about or even by reducing current household costs until that amount was saved and then paying that part of the tile in cash, if possible.

@cpatist Thanks. Unfortunately, it doesn't always work. Lust still wins sometimes... ;)

I can't even comprehend having a plan that was so complete and thorough that I didn't change something... During our build we too decided to stay as close to budget as possible... That all changed the day we broke ground and the house was staked out. I stood in what was to be our "great room" and decided it wasn't really all that great. I called the contractor and we moved the outside wall of our great room 3'. They had to bring the excavator back in and it required another beam for the floor. My wife was really, really stressed about us making a change so quickly in the process... Once the foundation walls were poured and the framing done, she was very happy we made the change. This is our forever home and I honestly built about 15k into the build estimate for changes and adds... I managed to lay the floor tile, do the landscaping and installed all of our lighting - so it was basically a wash. All that said - you are writing the story of your life in everything you do - do what you want and make it a story worth reading. I'm betting your husband may have splurged on himself a time or two... your turn. Also, who is going to know you didn't stick to the budget. I'm sure nobody but you, your hubby and the contractor will every know or care.

@cpatist Thanks. Unfortunately, it doesn't always work. Lust still wins sometimes... ;)

Tell it to the quartzite I'm putting in my new build. ;)