Thank you for your reply.

Its complicated and my friend is meeting with a different Trust Attorney to get advice.

The house she is selling (Trust) requires repairs which are very expensive. Asbestos, radon, electrical. It was built turn of the century. But is in a very exclusive area of NY, outside of Manhattan.

My friend would have to use her small savings ($200,000) to fix these repairs which are required before a bank would give a mortgage. The Trustees (her kids) agreed to sell the house at a very low price for the area. The comps on her house is close to 2M. Kids told her to do the repairs. The only money she can access is whats in her savings.

I told her to ask the attorney whether a loan could be taken against the house to finance the repairs so she doesn't need to use her savings. Once the house sells it all goes into the Trust (her kids).

It doesn't feel kosher to me. Why doesn't the Trust pay for the repairs?

I'm hoping tomorrow she can find out if the whole Trust can be changed. Her kids are angry with her. They dropped out of the Trust leaving the Trust lawyer in charge. But his firm is involved with the Realtor and the firm/ He wants her to do the repairs and sell at the low price.

I'm so far away. I'm not sure how clear she can express herself to this new Attorney. She's European and in her 90's.

I'm so troubled by this. I wish I was closer to help her out.

Jane

Try googling elder abuse in her area, and see if you can find someone to help her. There are all kinds of agencies out there that should be able to help. These types of abuse make me crazy, I just will never understand how children can do these things to their very own parents.

There are a few things that a red flags here for me. First, from what I know, the trust cannot be changed, but if she has a good relationship with her kids and they have no interest right now, they just need to sign the papers to sell the house. We set this up with my mom and we were told she could sell her house and buy another, but "the trust is the one that purchases", not her in particular. The trust is set up that way to prevent a nursing home in her later years from taking everything she owns. The second thing is, someone needs to get involved with the sale of this home. I find it hard to believe that she has 200k worth of repairs on radon, electrical and asbestos. The most expensive radon system I have ever heard of was $1800, the electric could be a few thousand and the asbestos, no where near hundreds of thousands.

Thanks for your reply. What I wrote is that she would have to pay the repairs out of her small savings.

The electrical is not up to code and the house needs rewiring. Large house, plaster walls, etc. Will create a lot holes in the walls. She has two underground oil tanks which are not allowed anymore. They want them dug up and removed. The house has a slate roof which needs repair.

Apparently water pipes are wrapped in asbestos and need to be removed.

I could go on and on. For her to use her savings makes no sense to me. But the Trust has no money so a loan can't be made against it. She has to use her savings to fix these repairs.

Updating, she is still sitting there, the house is off the market and she received an offer from a couple who said they will take care of the repairs. The husband is in construction and feels he can do the work.

They offered her 1.2 Million. She accepted. The couple needs a mortgage. The bank will not issue a mortgage.

This house is beautiful. It was part of the Rockefeller Estate. The rooms are large. These buyers love the house and want to do the necessary repairs. It is an English Cotswold style with flagstone walls, walkways. Almost 2 acres of beautiful property with a separate guest cottage on the property. The Cottage has 2 bedrooms, 2 1/2 baths, fireplace, large kitchen. It borders on the Rockefeller property. Pocantico Hills, NY with top schools. Low taxes as the Rockefeller's own most of the land.

It is a sad situation because she is trying to handle it alone. Since the lawyer is now the sole Trustee, he charges her for every phone call or meeting. He wants the house sold.

Jane

I tried to find her listing to give you an idea of her house. Its stunning. The roof is so unusual that she needs a specialist in Cotswold houses to work on it. I found some images on Google to give an idea of the house although these are not her house but similar. Hers is large with small stone patios off various rooms, large gardens over 2 acres. The flowers and trees are beautiful. She and her husband cared for the property. They were not wealthy people but bought the house in the 40's. The house had been damaged in a fire so they got it for peanuts. She and her husband restored it back to its beauty. It always took my breath away whenever I visited.

If something is unsafe, it needs to be addressed. However, being not up to current code is generally not cause for repair. While in-ground fuel tanks may not be permitted in new installations, are you saying they must be remediated when the property sells? Wow.

The simple presence of asbestos does not in and of itself require remediation

Can she put you in charge of managing the trust, since she needs someone she can trust not to take advantage of her. Who is her power of attorney?

I have found once folks get older, the takers crawl out of the woodwork.

Thank you all for the response. I live in Florida, she is in NY. We were the closest friends for over 40 years and what is happening breaks my heart. I told her I would be willing to be in charge of her Trust if necessary, but being so far away makes it complicated. Her two adult children control everything.

Salti, the laws require these problems be corrected before a bank will give a mortgage on the property. Her children want her to pay for the repairs then ask a higher price for the house.The cost comes out of her small savings.

Its so complicated because she has no control. She should have never signed those documents! She has no say about anything and no one to help her.

I am writing this because I want to warn people to think carefully about signing this type of Trust. You lose all your rights.

Jane

This discussion and the situation it describes are full of misunderstandings and misinformation. As I said in my earlier comment, what is needed is a lawyer to give your friend advice and a better grasp of alternatives. If she doesn't like the lawyer she's using, she should take her work elsewhere - nothing ties her to one lawyer, even if it's the one who drew up the documents. Yes, lawyers (and accountants and other professionals) charge for every phone call and discussion. They don't work for free, they charge for their services based on the time spent.

Irrevocable trusts are vanilla, everyday matters. I effectively have one upon the death of either myself or my wife and so too will anyone else who has done an A-B living trust plan. Your friend needs to understand what her circumstances are and manage her relationships with her kids. Her strained relationships and her lack of understanding of her legal/financial position are the likely sources of her otherwise avoidable and very manageable "predicament".

Keep in mind she is in her 90's.

But of sound mind, according to the first post. Maybe not so much or she's unfamiliar with household financial matters.

Just to update (I didn't realize there were newer posts). The house is waiting to close by a buyer who needs to sell her own house and get a mortgage on my friends home. It seems to be moving along and the buyer has sold her house but there's been some hangup with the mortgage.

The trust was not changed because one of her children dropped out, does not want anything to do with her sister, who is the other trustee. So the lawyer is now the second trustee and he won't change the trust. She's stuck.

Her two children no longer speak. My friend is so upset and is going to try to find a way to get her daughter to agree to change the trust to revocable. But the lawyer keeps emailing the daughter telling her it would be a big mistake.

Anyway, I have no idea what will happen. Maybe the house will sell this month and she can move on with her life.

Jane