Some of the automatic computers will send you to a real person if you just hit "O".

You want Gethuman. http://gethuman.com/

I'd never heard of this site, sushipup. Thanks for posting it. Next time I'll check there first.

Malfleur01: Most numbers I've been calling won't let you hit 0 to get a human anymore. And, if you say "customer service" the robot asks you to state your reason for calling so it can connect you to the right person in Customer Service.

One good place was Blue Shield. A human actually answered the call, listened to my need, and quickly routed me to the right department. Such a concept!

If you just keep repeating "customer service" to any question asked...you'll get a human

While that use to be the standard fall-back, it doesn't seem to work with these new systems.

I had another of the same experience on a recent call. These all have to do with reporting my DH's death. On several I found I was able to just mail the required info and a death certificate instead of fighting their phone system.

I still haven't gotten thru to the SSA to make an appointment - 7 calls so far; the longest time I waited before giving up was 65 minutes! And, so, why can't I do this online?

Well, guess what? Google your local SSA office and you will find a local number to call. I called our Fresno Office and got a human right away. The agent was super helpful and is busy solving problems I didn't even know I had. We'll see what August brings.

Her strong suggestion was: call your local SSA office before doing anything any SSA letter tells you to do. Just thought I'd pass that along.

Glad you finally got some help that was helpful!

Glad things are going better now. It doesn't seem that long ago that I was going through that for my dad. I found out there were a number of entities he hadn't notified about my mother's recent passing, so it was sometimes a double whammy. Prioritize. Most of the things you need to do can be done over weeks or months and you don't need to push beyond what you are ready to handle. It's okay to ask for help too.

I have a list of things that need to be done and am ticking them off one by one. Somethings have ended in surprises. I mentioned about the SS because I thought the info might help someone here in the future.

One other thing: You might not need as many Death Certificates as you think. Very often when I would call one of my "items" the person would check online and since DH's death was in the paper that's all they needed... for it to have been published. I bought 10 DCs and so far have actually used 4. I had to pay for each one so I'm a bit peeved there.

I also bought more DCs than I needed, but I knew he had a number of accounts that might each require one and it was cheaper to pay $2 each for a number more than to have to go back and place a second order for just one and then have to wait for it. I only had a couple of places that needed an original and I got back all but one or two. I think of the others as insurance against needing more. I gave one to each sibling for their records -- not something I would have thought to do except my dad gave us each a copy of my mom's.

I hadn't thought of giving each of our children a copy of the DC. Thanks for the good idea!

$2 for DC, wow! we paid $14 for my mom's in L.A. county. Lot of banks & businesses will copy it & give it back to you, only need about 5.

I thought our $12.50 each was bad! I needed 3 originals to send one to each of the 3 credit bureaus... which I just did today.

I don't remember what we paid for the first one -- it might have been as much as $20 or so. That might have also been the first plus 3 or 4 copies that the funeral home suggested worked for more folks. Getting an additional one later was more.

I knew my dad had been kind of quirky about having a a number of smaller bank accounts -- one each at a number of different places. I ordered extra in case they, the cemetery and other places wanted originals. At $2 or $3 each, I was able to order a number for the same cost as getting one extra later on. That was about all the mental math I was up for when they asked, so I went with it.

I just got the original copy back from EquiFax, which was very nice of them.

Oh, and by-the-way, I still haven't solved my original problem with SS. I really am beginning to wonder if the agent-on-the-phone understands what I originally called for. I guess I will just have to go over there and sit until I get waited-on. Oh well......

I still do 0 on most of my calls or say agent, agent, agent over and over. I hate it when Cox Cable tries to get me to solve my problem on the internet.

Everybody does nowadays, which I am willing to do, but, there's never an icon on their site for "death".

Check with the mortuary to see if they directly reported the death to SS. Some do, some don't. They may be able to give you some guidance.

Yes, they reported the death to SS, but that's all they do.

The funeral home reported the death for my parents. I was told we should not see any SS or VA payments for the coming month, but we did. Don't touch any SS payments made after the death. They will reclaim them. It might take a couple of months for things to catch up, but they will reclaim them.

Like lascatx stated the payments will be reclaimed and any death benefit should be sent to whoever the mortuary listed as in charge. What do you need to contact SS/Medicare about. I am confused.

I'm so sorry for everyone's trials & grief.

didn't read all the replies, just too hard.

When my elderly friend died, I called the (very bad) hospice provider, as I'd been instructed.

It was about 2:30 AM, & I was distressed, & maybe I did mumble or speak through tears, but the person who answered said, "What? What are you trying to say? The patient has *expired*???"

The end of someone's life is hard even without "service providers" being obstructive & obnoxious.

If you can't negotiate a system you've been instructed to use, call the fire department.

They were extremely kind & helpful to a friend whose husband died suddenly.

I wish all of you the very best.

May I say how sorry I am about the loss of your friend.

These sorts of phone calls seem so easy to do before you actually have to do it. I had to make such a call in April and it was a very hard thing to do... to call and say, "... my best friend is dead. Please send someone."

I will be going through the loss of a parent at some point. Mom has Parkinson's. After reading this thread, I looked for a thread about who to contact after a death - SSA, BCBS, credit bureaus (had not thought of that). What others are common?

I did talk to the life insurance rep recently when I had to call him about something else. He had some good suggestions. Many will go close bank accounts too quickly. He said to leave one in her name open for several months in case a check comes in her name that needs to be deposited. Otherwise, might have to get it reissued.

Allison, I kept an account open about 18 months after my dad's passing. By contrast, a friend who lost her husband will complete probate less than 8 weeks after he passed. I didn't receive the tax return refund for over a year, It was made payable to me, but I deposited it into the account I was holding open and paid my brother and sister from there. I did not want to comingle those funds with my personal finds. I aso had a totally unexpected check that arrived after the tax refund -- I hope there isn't anything still out there now. It didn't cost me anything to leave a smaller balance ere and also have a reserve in case there was anything I was unaware of that I needed to pay for in the meantime. I wanted to take my time and make sure things were done right and that I was done.

Any bank, credit card issuer, investment holder or other financial instution will freeze her accounts as soon as they are notified of her passing unless you are also on the account. That can leave you in a lurch until you get the death certificate (up to a month, so bills may become due) and/or whatever legal documentation they require -- and each one will do things a little differently. Those may be some things to look at now to see if you can simplify things.

Other possible notifications to consider: VA (for her or survivor benefits), insurance companies, any lenders, banks or credit card companies, investment firms, utilities, county office that handles voter registration and jury service in your area. Look for anything she has automatic payments on, charities she made donations to, magazine subscritions, comanies that she bought from or who send her catalogs, memberships -- anything from a garden club or sorrority - even political candidates and parties if you don't want to be getting the mail. The IRS will get notice when you file her tax return and indicate it is a final return.

You will hear this plenty, I'm sure, but make sure you know when she gets any government benefits (SS, VA, etc.). IIRC, my dad got one usually just before the end of the monh and the other several days into the month -- in both cases they were for the new month. He passed on the 29th, so he was not entitled to either. Had he passed on the 1st, he would have kept them. The Treasury is very good about reclaiming any funds that were not earned (they notify the bank and take them -- then you get a notice that the funds are gone), so do not spend those funds unless you know you are entitled to keep them. It can cause a lot of ugliness if you wind up without expected funds.

I feel like I am rambling. So many things vary from case to case and state to state, but I hope that helps at least a little.

As a rule it's polite to notify other drs your mom went to,dentist, pharmacy, eye dr. so they can close their records. Stockbroker, & check her Christmas card list to see if people to notify, or personal phone book. If house needs to be sold you must have an open bank account for that for about 18 mos as there are some taxes on that & some dr. & hospital bills, Cat scans, MRI, surgeon (billed apart from hospital ) can take that long to arrive. Newspaper may be renewed at her bank so check on that too. Print all this stuff out so you have it when you need it. My bro & I handled things out here for folks so that was good to talk some things over. Will gets probated, Trust doesn't. Trust usually gets things done fast.

My husband took care of his mothers final passing years before it happened. He had hired an elder lawyer to help plan everything. It made it so much easier on him. His brothers were of no help to him. He notified all the people who needed to notified after the fact. I was also sick at the time. She didn't have an up to date phone directory and didn't live where she once did anymore. But somehow it turned out as well as it could under the circumstances. We had to travel to her home state to have her services. Which went well. My husband also spoke at the services.

Wow,lascatx, folks had 1 trust went like clockwork, just take death certificate in to most places & realtor told us all we needed to sell house, most of things settled in 4 months but left some money in account for surprise bills as I said above & that last check was all that was left & we got them some time ago. Without a trust in CA. you get probated & then the lawyers suck you dry. Folks trust cost about $600. 20 yrs ago & they paid once to update it. Yrs ago relative had 3 lawyers draw up "airtight" regular will. Well lawyers got almost all of the money & was tied up in court for yrs & a sister that had disinherited herself got most of what was left. I had my trust made at same time as my folks. Much simpler as just me . Cost about 1/2 of what my folks cost. Will save my kids a lot of hassle.

lascatx, our Trust got split in two parts at DH's death, but I still am the Trustee so nothing really changed except the name. And, having the Trust, and what was in it, made all very simple; and, 5 months later all is done.

To an earlier poster: by law the funeral home has to notify the Social Security Administration and Medicare of someone's passing. You have to notify everyone else. One that I missed was his medicare supplemental insurance carrier and drug insurer... if it's different than the first. His was Blue Shield for medical and Humana for drugs.