I only like photos of myself taken by people taller than I. For selfies, which I do not take but noice in others that holding the camera above your eye level also produces a more flattering image. I do try to avoid being in photos though for fear they steal your soul :).

People have commented that I'm photogenic, but the truth is that most of the photos they've seen were taken by me, and I deleted all but the very best ones.

Holding a camera/phone at arm's length distorts most people. My son says I look like Jay Leno in pictures taken that way. Instead, I put the camera on a shelf, stand near a northern-facing window, and use the camera's timer to take my selfies.

Believe me, they're not all great. Somehow, the "good hair day" I see in my mirror doesn't always translate to the photo, for example.

One hint I can give you is about expression. All by themselves, some people find it hard to come up with a natural smile. I think about someone I love, or something funny--my little grandsons combine the two, and that usually works. Let the smile come into your eyes first.

Face the camera, or try a 3/4 shot. Or turn slightly and let the camera catch you "by surprise." Be prepared to delete a lot. Some days I've deleted them all. :-)

Hope this helps.

If the photographer is standing up and you are sitting which means you
have to look up a bit, your eyes and skin will look better.

I've learned early on that if you are going to be in a photo then be prepared to smile! Stand up straight, tilt your head a bit and smile. I agree with Alisande, think happy thoughts and it will show through.

I have awful bags under my eyes. Also my mouth is crooked. Make-up can only do so much. But, when I smile, all these flaws are erased!

I have taught both my daughters early on and they are always happy with their photos. (Okay, it doesn't hurt to be young and beautiful.)

How many people do you know who don't want their picture taken and as a result their expressions look silly or angry etc? I feel if someone doesn't want to be in a photo, then step aside. We'll certainly miss you but we're not going to force you. And, don't wonder years from now why your attendance wasn't documented.)

Oh geez - everybody has a camera these days, but not everybody knows how to take good photographs, do they? I'm lucky to be in a family of photographers - my dad was a pro & I studied photography in college, so I notice when people seem to have no clue - & it happens a lot. That is to say, it's probly not you...

I've never liked having my photo taken. I've always been heavy, and I'm not classically beautiful. So, I come to it from a different place than those who have always felt/been-known-as attractive. My mother was a beauty and has had trouble dealing with the effects of aging (will NOT put on a bathing suit to swim, doesn't want to reconnect with friends from 40+ years ago even though she now lives only an hour away, etc.). We've had such different life experiences when it comes to appearance, and the value we and others have placed on our appearance, that I can't offer her much in the way of encouragement.

I think as I've aged I've become more accepting of my appearance (is there anyone I know who truly isn't aware that I'm fat? Probably not, so what am I hiding?) So it comes down to me and my own comfort. For pictures of groups of friends/family, I try to be in a "spot" that works for me and hold my head in a flattering way and let the chips fall where they may. For "selfies", I find that the slightly askew, partial face shots are great. I'm able to tilt away the dark circles and avoid the chin(s) and focus on the good stuff (skin, eyes, smile).

First of all, you're probably being too hard on yourself and how you look in photos. Most of us do that, we're supercritical of ourselves, focusing on our real or perceived flaws.

One SIL and my BFF hate being in pictures, they tense up and complain, and that uncomfortableness is reflected in pictures. I never force anyone into a pic, I respect their wishes, but sadly we have so few photos over the years that include them.

Good advice above for when you want to be in a pic: try to be relaxed, think of something positive and not how you don't like photos of yourself. The only person who will closely study you in the photo is you. Everyone else will be either focused on their imagine or the overall composition or the memory of the what made someone take the photo.

There's a tip about pretending you're looking over a fence so your neck is tall and your chin a bit forward. It helps get rid of double chins.

There's an Australian blog by Imogen Lamport you should google. She has tips on how to pose for photos.

Whenever I turn the camera around so I see my own image, I am horrified. I certainly don't look that way in the mirror, nor do I in photos others take of me. But there is something awful about the selfie thing that makes one most unattractive. In fact, there's been a surge in plastic surgery as a result of selfies, facetime, etc.

How to pose for flattering photo

I hear and empathize on the bad photo experiences. And I agree with rorah on that whole soul stealing thing.

Selfies are usually bad pictures of the subject. They're taken too close and from the wrong angle. Maybe that's a sign people shouldn't be so self involved?

Well, I have the photo of all photos coming up. The DMV renew your driver's license photo. They really don't care, but I will wear makeup and smile. I will try to give that camera that look like I am so very much in love with it. Rolling eyes......

The elderly gentleman who took my last DMV photo said, "This one isn't good. We'll do it again." It wasn't grotesque, so I said, "Oh, that's okay. I don't care." "Well, I do," he said.

I hope you get him, Suzi. Although if you're in Zone 9b and I'm in 4a it doesn't seem likely. :-)

I also think that some people really are more photogenic than others. I generally avoid photos. I will get in them and smile if I must but am not fond of that practice. Cameras can distort things. In the case of a relation of mine, they take selfies all the time. It is ridiculous the number of selfies but she does look good in them. Really good. The problem is, when I see her in real life, the photo and the reality do not jive. It seems that in her mind, she looks like what the camera captures and she seems to be happy with it. Of course, I am not privy to how many shots she tries for each photo, but the results are unreal.

I used to tilt my chin up in photos (too much self esteem I guess, I was standing proudly) and it made my entire chin and neck into one big square blob. A photographer told me to put chin out slightly and down slightly and it made a big difference. I also tend to raise my eyebrows a bit (widen my eyes), and smile. My problem now is I often look like an evil villain in photos - can't describe it but I look vaguely maniacal. I think it's smiling on top of my perpetual lack of sleep!

I think in future, friends and family will appreciate photos of you having a good time no matter what.

How many people do you know who don't want their picture taken and as a result their expressions look silly or angry etc?

My lovely grandmother does this and I really wish she wouldn't. The end result isn't good. I purposely limit my photo taking as to not be obnoxious, but I'll attack with the camera a few times a year. The warm, caring lady she is shines through bright on the ones where she makes an effort or I manage to catch a real smile. (FWIW, my photos are my personal keepsakes and they go in an album, on my wall, and/or some form of backup. My family and friends know this.)

Try not to be too hard on yourself and if you are going to agree to a photo try and put your best foot forward with the smile, posture, etc. Most people just snap a photo wherever. Lighting makes a big difference. Harsh sun can create unpleasant shadows and accentuate lines you may not want showing. Try and find even shade, face toward the light source, but also keep your background in mind. Don't stand facing the camera straight on and I always like to make sure my face is angled showing the 'good side'. With my haircut, the one angle is more flattering for photos.

I'm another person who dreads having my picture taken. I am not photogenic at all. It is so interesting how some people actually look better in photos than in real life, and some worse.

The best thing I've discovered is that a big unnatural smile is often not very flattering. Laughing, serious, or a small smile where you "smile with your eyes" tends to look better. I also think good posture, putting your chin slightly forward, and turning slightly sideways help.

I read an awful thing recently. Supposedly, the "you" in the mirror is not the accurate image, the true you is in the photo images. Aaackkk!

More people photoshop than you realize.

I appreciate all the comments.

Maybe I wasn't clear but I don't hate having my photo taken- I do smile- and have a very nice smile. ( Yes there are times I am not a willing subject but I am not talking about that. I am talking about when I think I am looking good, and then seeing the actual photo. OY). I guess it's just aging._

I agree that probably not having a photo taken straight on, and that standing with good posture, I have noticed that photos taken from slightly above do tend to be more flattering. These are the types of suggestions I am asking about.

I am going to re-read the comments here. (and take copious notes).

I have this same problem. I feel like I look very ugly in photos. I would consider myself to be fairly attractive. Not a model or anything but I think I'm pretty but I hate every single photo of me in some capacity or other. It doesn't help that I have a mild pitosis in one eye that seems to be captured in many of the photos. It makes we look like I'm drunk or on drugs. I feel like I am not photogenic at all, but there are some photos I will go to delete and my husband won't let me. He tells me there is nothing wrong with that photo you look great. So I know it's something in my head, but I don't know how not to be critical. I do feel like when when age a little or gain some weight it does take getting used to ourselves.

Along the same lines when I was a teenager I would look in the mirror and think I was super "ugly". I wasn't even an awkward teenager so I don't know what was going on. A few years ago it came up in conversation with my husband and he said he had felt the same way as a teen and actually thought he was the ugliest person ever. My husband is a very attractive man, so it surprised me to hear. Both of us "grew out" of that but I obviously carry some form of it with being overly critical of myself. And I am being overly critical. What I try to do know is delete the obviously super bad ones with droppy eye or mouth hanging open or "b" face. Seriously how many pictures of myself do my future generations need anyway. LOL Selfies or ones taken by others, it doesn't matter. If pictures are with other people and they all look great I don't touch them. If I am just mildly turned off by the photo I leave it as well since it's probably a decent photo and I am just being too critical. Everyone has flaws and we often accept other people's physical flaws but have unrealistic standards for our own. I think there is a learning curve and I know for myself I am much better than I was about it even 5 years ago.

My Samsung Galaxy phone has a "beauty mode" I won't take a selfie without it!

I am another who is not photogenic. When I was young I was a runway model because I was pretty, tall enough and thin, had great legs and a nice walk. But there are no photos of me looking pretty despite all the tricks with lighting and filters that the professional photographers could dream up. Body shots, yes. Face shots, no. No posed, no candids, no stills from film or video.

My husband, though he never earned his living as a photographer but rather as a print journalist, nevertheless has many photo credits. In 47 years of marriage he has been unable to take a pretty picture of me. Hundreds of great pics of our kids, none of me.

Some people really are not photogenic. My five year old granddaughter took a selfie of the two of us. When she saw the picture, she said, "That doesn't look like you, Grandma." Maybe we should look into a Samsung with beauty mode! I would love to have a nice picture of myself!

I have the same problem with mirrors. No matter which I look in, the same ugly face appears....and I've tried a lot of them!

;)

I just found this side of the forum so this is a late reply. But I found this topic to be interesting. My DH, DD & DS are all photogenic. I'm not so much.... And I think in part it's a case where after having seen pictures that aren't flattering I've become overly conscious of how I'll look in a picture so I end up looking off. Sometimes I'm opening up my eyes too wide or wearing a too big smile. You can sense how hard I'm trying.

My best trick is posing with my dogs or a grandchild. I'm in the moment and those are the best pictures. Ironically, my current DMV license shot is one of the favorite pics I've seen of myself. I went in expecting it to be awful, so didn't even try. Just gave the clerk a genuine smile and Voila! Will hate seeing this one expire ;)

Another thing I've discovered is that over time those photos you thought were so-so when seen a few years later seem to look pretty darn good.

My Mom didn't think she was photogenic - she wasn't, although she was a beautiful woman who aged gracefully. But she was a good sport and joined in family shots. Since she passed, I can't tell you how I treasure coming upon those photos. That's something I consider when I'm tempted to opt out because I don't think I'm looking picture-perfect. I want my kids & grands to see me having a good time with them.

There are 4 of us from grammar school who get together once a month for lunch, a museum, ballgame, etc. We always take photos. We went through a selfie phase, but noses were huge and necks very crepey, so we usually ask someone in the vicinity to take our photos. We all smile because usually we're happy and having fun together. Everyone looks better smiling.

But when it comes to posting on Facebook, everyone has to agree to it. If one person hates how they look, it's a deal-breaker.

The beauty of selfies is the ability to take them over and over and over until you get one in which you don't look like a troll. (I'm speaking from experience - not calling anyone a troll!) I run many of my photos through Instagram and fiddle with the filters. I share very few photos of myself online that have NOT been run through a filter. Filters are your friend!