A kitchen and bathroom never need to be renovated. Sometimes they need to be repaired, but updating is usually optional and can be postponed. Embrace "retro". For decorating help, take some photos and visit the home decorating forum--they can be budget friendly! :)

Of things you mentioned, I'd start with plumbing and anything dangerous. Is the deck dangerous or just ugly? Live with ugly, fix dangerous (only because of the kids).

There is really not enough information to help.

In my house I had plumbing problems (really I just had waste and supply pipes I didn't like). It was much easier to just completely remodel the bath and do the plumbing at the same time. To offer some advice we need a bit more specifics. So if you have time to answer these questions it would be great.

1. What is wrong with the exterior walkway and steps (chipped concrete, uneven, pulling away from the house)?
2. What is wrong with the windows? And are they drafty enough to make parts of your house uncomfortable?
3. As Fori asked what is wrong with the deck?
4. Is the plumbing draining slow? And do you have decent access to it?
5. Are the lights just ugly or are the switches not working?
6. Is the kitchen ugly or not suited to the way you use it?
7. As Pro asked what is your general area and do you have a budget?

You can get free guidance here. Post some photos, tell us what your budget is, tell us what the problems are, and we can chip in with suggestions for making the house more livable. You'll find kitchen designers in the Kitchens forum, bath experts in the Baths forum, and so on with plumbing, electrical etc.

We spoke with a stager on the sale of my late MIL's home. Her advice was to paint all the woodwork white and all the walls a soft linen color. Just those two steps made the home look cleaner, bigger and fresh. Replace knobs and pulls with new. Overstock.com has some good ones at very reasonable prices.
Most stores have sales on Holidays. Take advantage of carpet and flooring sales.
You can find sales on appliances and can buy them with a ding nobody will ever see at a ding and dent sale.
For safety issues, hire a pro. We bought a similarly neglected house and remodeled it, but the decks were very unsafe! They had to be completely redone due to rotten wood here and there. I wasn't completely thrilled, but my DH and the contractor went with pressure treated wood. It's pretty ugly but very strong and not expensive.
If you want a color palette, simply find some fabric you love and match the colors in it. Don't stray from your palette! Keep it simple. Less is more.

Thanks for the suggestions. You have me feeling better about this house because most of the issues are not safety related but ugliness and poor function.

Area is DC suburbs. Budget is approximately $60k, which may sound like a decent budget but lots of people spend that or more on just a kitchen here, and contractors are busy, which means the prices keep going up.

The exterior walk and stairs are the biggest safety concern; they are crumbling.

The plumbing issues are fixtures that are breaking and slow drains that sometimes just stop draining altogether. The pipes with decent access have been replaced, but there are still issues, and those can only be dealt with by breaking into walls. The lighting fixtures are just ugly, I would also like to put in ceiling fans so that we won't have to use air conditioning as much.

The kitchen is UGLY but also severely limited in counter space and storage. It's usable but difficult and I constantly have to move pans around when cooking.

The bathrooms have cracked tiles and peeling paint, and fixtures that are loose and breaking. The drywall appears to have old water damage.

The windows are not all that drafty, but I can see rotting wood on some of them.

The deck needs minor repair (loose boards) and there is green stuff growing on it. Probably a power washing and sealer would help, but someone told us you should never use a power washer on a deck because it damages the wood. I'm not sure if that is correct but it's stopped us from doing anything.

We are open to suggestions. Thanks again!

Are you on the Virginia side? If so, I might be able to help with referrals to reasonably price contractors and handypeople. PM me if you don't want to publicly post info about the specific town you live in.

Also, you might consider a tact my NoVA-dwelling sister recently took to fix up a lot of stuff in her house for sale prep. She posted specific projects on CL, from replacing grout around a tub to removing a tree to a bunch of drywall repair to painting her entire house. She also had a slew of handyman jobs. She posted a photo of what needed to be done, specifics on timing (needed to be done in the evenings when she was home), and asked for bids. She got lots of emails, ranging from hacks saying "I can fix this for you, text me" (which she ignored) to bona fide contractors looking for fill-in work. She picked a couple with the best responses, talked to them further on the phone, and then hired one. All did excellent work.

I'd consider starting with your plumbing stuff, and let them cut holes in the walls to access the pipes. Once you're done, get a drywaller to come in and patch everything. Paint it yourselves.

Find a concrete person to redo your walk and stairs.

Get a handyman to replace your light fixtures, doors and repair your deck.

Find a window company to replace your windows (if that's what needed).

Piecing out this stuff will be less costly (and faster) than finding a GC to organize it all. You may not be handy enough to save on labor by DIY-ing the work, but you can DIY the hiring of specialists and save on the middleman.

In the meantime, work on your plans for kitchen and bath remodels by using the respective forums here. We can help you design spaces that are functional, beautiful, and budget-friendly. Nice kitchens can be had for way less than $60K.

Start watching CL in the "materials" section and snag stuff that you can use in your work. People sometimes post entire kitchens, you can find brand new vanities or tops, and you might luck into some ceiling fans. Ebay often has good deals on faucets and other bathroom fixtures, so troll the listings there.

Where to start? Make a specific list of what you want done and show it to every person you interview to work on your house. They usually know when the best time would be to do their part of the job.

Work from top down (i.e, roof to foundation) and inside to outside (i.e, plumbing, HVAC, and wiring to replacing fixtures). This way, you minimize going over work you have already done. For instance, suppose you fix your walls and floors and fixtures only to find out a wall has to be torn apart to get at plumbing or wiring. That's money down the drain, literally.

Expect this to take a long time.

The list in the order I see it.

1. Windows - rotting windows are both a sign and precursor of more serious problems. Start with a wood window restoration company. Many times wood windows can be salvaged much less expensively than replaced. If replacement is necessary, get lots of quotes, and check them on the window forums.

2. Walks and porches - Find a mason and have him look at it, many times they are extremely affordable for small jobs that they can do at their convenience. So be flexible on finish date.

3. Baths and plumbing - Your bathroom seems like the thing that needs the highest priority of the cosmetics. Loose fixtures can become more serious problems over time, and old water damage could mean old rot or mold damage in walls.

4. Deck - Deck brush and elbow grease. Then get some deck screws and get it all locked down tite then reseal it or put one of the synthetic painted cover coatings on it.

5 Lights - Youtube + patience + safety = DIY your lights. Ceiling fans need more support but you can still DIY this one.

6 Kitchen - lurking on the kitchen forums = learning to love IKEA. IKEA + patience = IKEA 20% off sale. IKEA 20% off sale = an affordable kitchen that you can do yourself. Bang for your buck, they really are amazing. Even if you decide to go with a different brand, pricing out an IKEA kitchen can help you with your priorities.

I think you will be well served by selecting a local design/build contractor to help you identify what needs to be done and in what priority order given your lifestyle needs and budget constraints. In order to advise you, folks would need access to your home to access existing conditions and they'd need to have a knowledge of construction costs in your area.