Realitykraft, one line in your post has me concerned: "She treats the woman who lives with her almost like a servant even though she is actually a friend." Makes me wonder how she'll treat YOU! My Mother lived with us for just over 12 years; we went from a joyful Mom, full of wit and humour to a Mom who barely recognizes me now. We just placed her in a nursing home because it became impossible for me to leave the house or get thru a full nights' sleep, as she needed bathroom care each time she used it. (which became often) I don't want to discourage you, but you're so young, you will have a new marriage with its own inherent adjustment time and having your MIL move in with you will add stress to the mix you'd never anticipate. IF this is the only solution, then the absolute FIRST thing to do is get Power of Attorney for her health! If a snap decision is to be made on her behalf, then you or your DH must be able to make those decisions for her. Secondly, you must get home-care in each day to attend to her daily needs, shower her or assist her (or BE THERE if she falls), take her for a walk, etc, etc. Also, get her assessed for dementia; if that's starting, yes the "fun" has just begun. She may require additional meds, or even a physiotherapist to assess your apt (no loose rugs, handrails in the shower, etc). They merely make suggestions, so don't worry about that, it's just for your own peace of mind. Also: you must allow her a piece or two of her favourite furniture, likely a chair she usually sits in at home, into your apartment. It probably won't "fit" with your decor, but even in the nursing home, each resident has their own rocker/recliner/glider brought in from home. This really helps. If her bedroom is large enough to accommodate it, then place it there for her to watch her own tv shows. I know she'll have new bedding and linens, but her own pillow is important, and a blanket she's familiar with. Also her own pictures from her bedroom at home, or chatchkis, or photos for her walls. The transition shouldn't be a shock to her...it should be made gently. Once again, I imagine she'll be alone in the apartment during the day...does she like to read (large print magazines, books, perhaps would help), does she knit or have a craft to occupy her time? My Mom loved those word-search books while watching tv, or even doing a puzzle with larger pieces, like 24 count-puzzles, etc. If she has dementia, she'll need a care-giver or even meals-on-wheels for her lunch time. This will be a big responsibility for you and your new DH. Sometimes siblings drop from sight, thinking she's cared for and they can neglect seeing her as often. Negotiate visits so they start right away. Make sure her friends keep in touch by phone or visits. You WILL turn into a chauffeur for all her appointments. If we haven't discouraged you, and you plan to go ahead with the move, then all the very best to the three of you! There will be good and bad times, and you will instantly have a "child" to care for. Take our advice: we've all been there/done that, or are still caring for someone we love. Move slowly, but get assistance in place immediately, esp POA for her health. You don't need to call everyone and negotiate treatment for her if it's an emergency, right? Take care, and remember we're here when you need us! Blessings Linda

(I have deposited more-than-a-year-old checks and had them clear; I can understand why your DH did this, as well as him not noticing. Also, my next-door neighbors were getting old a senile, and didn't cash pension checks; they got a letter saying "did you get your check? it hasn't been cashed? but it was many months later, and it was several checks still on the DR table, not one check) when they took the money out of your savings account, did they give the "defective" check back to you? Shouldn't they have? Demand it be returned to you. (a lesson to us all--if we are giving a bank money back for a check, we should get the check physically returned to us) Unless they submitted it all over again? Here's what I think happened, if I understand this right. (some queries, though) 1. You give them a check, they give you cash. 2. They send the check to the central clearing house (the Federal Reserve?) to get their money. 3. The central clearing house gives the CU its money, and sends the check on to GM to get the money back from them. 4. GM sends the check--but no money--back to the central clearing house as "defective"'; the central clearing house is still in need of money. 5. The central clearing house sends the check back to the CU as "defective" and wants its money back from them. I would think the CU would have an account of money it would use to cover this; it pays the central clearing house, and the central clearing house is out of it. 6. the CU brings the check back to you, and says they want that money back; they take it out of your account. THEY SHOULD GIVE THE CHECK BACK TO YOU--it is your property, once they have their money back. At the very least, they should have destroyed it, but really they should have given it to you so YOU could destroy it. I'm thinking this is where the CU goofed, and I'd press this point. 7. You get a replacement check, and submit it, and the "you to the CU to the central clearing house to GM" chain works, this time. (can you get the folks at GM to send you a copy of their canceled check, the replacement one that supposedly worked just fine? Might be nice to have) Suddenly the old "defective" check is around. (Sometimes if a check is returned for "insufficient funds," the bank will resubmit it, just in case the money will turn up. They will bill the depositor $15, and then if it's returned twice, they'll bill another $15; the check-writer's account will get billed as well each time; this was unpopular, so some banks don't make a second attempt. I'm wondering if your "defective" check got slipped into the "insufficient funds" category and was REsubmitted? So, let's postulate: 8. The credit union resubmits the check to the central clearing house (Federal Reserve?) to get the money. BUT IF THIS IS THE CASE, then they should have RECREDITED your account when they RESUBMITTED the check. (because if they don't give you any money, then they shouldn't be getting any money from anyone else--it's not their money, it's yours, they're just the "pipe" to move it around) Did they? If you can get them to trace their records of when the check was submitted, can you insist that they DO credit your account w/ the money, on that day? 9. The clearing house (FR?) gives the CU the money, and sends the "defective" check on to GM. 10. GM marks the "defective" check w/ a confusing note that was *intended* to indicate that this check has been replaced w/another check, and sends it, but no money, to the clearing house (FR?) 11. The clearing house sends the check back to the CU, demanding its money back. 12. The CU comes to you demanding the money that it owes to the FR. So, did they "give you money" for that check twice (once in cash, once by crediting your account)? No, you say--but if this is what happened, then they should have. Or else someone put that check in the wrong stack somewhere--and I'd want to SEE that check, and I'd want to try to figure who where the "in lieu of" came from. So they should have given you money twice, and asked to get money back from you twice. Maybe if that's the chain of events, you can make them re-credit your savings account w/t he money they owe you from having resubmitted the check (treating it as though you deposited it all over again), and then they can take it back out again. Good luck!

Kidzu, of course I tried that. What I get are a thousand little tiny boxes. When I click on them I get one photo that is so small I can't tell if its worth keeping. It won't enlarge. Plus, each photo is in a separate box so it requires clicking on these tiny boxes one at a time. I have over 1000 photos on my phone and many I do not want on my computer. I tried following the directions from Google. I can't tell what is what. When I plug in the phone a screen comes up full of photos with check marks. I can't tell if I'm looking at the phone or explorer. The only heading on the page is 'photo collection.' Over 1200 photos all containing check marks. If I click 'clear' and try to individually check the photos I want, it still imports all the photos. It states that the photos will be saved in a folder under my name. I'll be dammed if I can find them. I've had it with Win 10. This is ridiculous. Before I could copy what I wanted into the folders I wanted. Now I can't tell if I'm looking at the pics on the phone or on Windows. There is no information. I deleted multiple copies of the same photos and they keep reappearing. The system sucks. I simply want to copy manually what I want to copy and save in the folders I choose. Stupid, dumb and typical Microsoft! Thanks, no reply is necessary. Jane

I should have given more detail. The Win7 is probably not legitimate. I bought the old desk top several years ago on craigslist. It appeared to have been used in a business environment. It had/has Win7 Ultimate, but it was originally an ME machine. It also had MS Office. After ~1 year, I got messages that the MS Office needed renewing. Eventually, I went to my computer guy, who I guess has purchased bulk copies of various office sweets etc and also upgrades and retires old computers, presumably/perhaps moving their liscenses. He got Office reset. Last year, I had a problem needing his help and he told me that there were now indications that the Win7 ultimate was potentially not legal, but that he didn't have any copies of Ultimate. I'm not sure why he didn't set up a normal Win7 that I assume he has. A month or two after this, I began getting the Windows not real messages with the black screen.