Thanks everybody for your input. The shaker cabinets are new -- so that's why I hesitate to paint them. True, the lighting in the kitchen isn't that great -- so perhaps it would be difficult for people to notice the difference. I would love, however, to change the hardware. Currently they are the tubular pulls which seem too contemporary for this pre-war apartment. I know I may have to paint the cabinets depending on the new hardware I select. If I can fill in the holes with wood filler and have it paint so it would be seamless, I'd leave it as it is. But not sure if that will happen. If I end up having to paint the cabinets, I figure might as well paint them the same color as the trim/moldings. Decorators White looks good in all of the rooms (with the exception of the master bedroom where colors are more muted) because the furniture tends to run on the fresh clean side.

Not sure but I can’t edit my other comment so. Why not think just the island done with soapstone counter and all the cabinets a nice neutral . Choosing cabinet color is also dependant on many things . Or choose all the same counters and do just the island cabinets in that color you like. IMO a designer might be a good choice to avoid mistakes. Building a house is a daunting task with all the decisions that need to be made some help is usually a good idea. I also would strongly reccommend a kitchen designer from the beginning not your architect but an actual KD

Congratulations on your new house! The first thing that caught my eye is that you have a lot of windows so you’ll have plenty of natural light. That will work well with the farmhouse look. This house has lots of possibilities, but I would suggest you focus first on figuring out your budget and then decide what your first priority should be. Houses always need repairs you don’t expect, so keeping some extra money in savings is more important than getting the decor perfect right away. You can use the idea book feature here or a Pinterest board to gather inspiration pics if you haven’t already. Then as you make each decision you can plan it to fit into your big picture. For instance, I really like Hallet’s idea that you could paint the ceilings and trim. But some farmhouse looks have bright white trim and some have a light greige or other neutral and then bright white walls. If you think through which you’d prefer now then you won’t find yourself stuck later after spending time and money on the wrong option. I didn’t see anything in your original post about needing wedding ideas, so I’m not really sure why the timing of the wedding is important. :)

I used to watch a TV show about how to dress properly for your size. I always remember the hosts saying "things should go with each other and not necessarily match". So my advice is if the fixtures you like "go with" each other , then use them.. It's your house.