You say you've threatened to call the cops if they physically hurt their sister... it sounds like you may have to do more than threaten if it ever happens again. Physical abuse is a crime, and I don't think you have to be 18 to be accountable. There is a very clear line of what can and can't be condoned, talked through or otherwise worked out and physical abuse is over that line. The boys need to know very plainly and in no uncertain terms that if they hurt the girls or anyone else, they will be picked up by the cops. As for the other stuff (lying, refusing to do chores), well, obviously that's harder to deal with because it's more vague. But I think it's safe to say that in most human dealings, the best way to influence or improve somebody's behavior is to make it real unpleasant for them to continue what they're doing... to make it in their interest to change their behavior. And let them know the deal so there is no surprise or uncertainty so that if they choose to misbehave they have no one to blame for the repercussions they suffer but themselves. It may not prove a foolproof method, but I'd guess it's worth a try. Like for example: "Dude, you are NOT going to like what happens if I hear you call your sister a bad name again, because you're not going to like scrubbing the floor with a toothbrush and vinegar at 5:00 in the morning. Your choice." Or: "yeah I know you don't really feel like doing the dishes. And I don't really feel like cooking you dinner or paying for your phone either. If you back out on your promises and contributions to the family, I guess others in the family have a right to back out on their promises and contributions to you. It's much better for all of us if we all pitch in and do things to help each other out. But again, your choice." You as the step-parent who isn't even living full-time with the step-kids REALLY don't have to do anything for them. Their mom obviously has to provide a basic decent level of care and make sure there's food in the house for them to eat, etc. But at their age she doesn't have to cook it! There are plenty of "extra" things you and she can leverage and refuse to do for them until they learn to behave decently, without running the risk of being negligent parents. In the meantime, though, do proceed with family counseling. Even though the boys' behavior desperately needs changing, it sounds like there are some genuine adjustment problems and anger issues that need to be addressed. Especially with the older boy, who sadly sounds like he has had a lot in his life to be angry about. He just can't be allowed to continue expressing it in the ways that he has been.

Love what you did! The room looks so warm, comfortable and fun. I envy your ability to put things together, not to mention the speed with which you can go from pondering what look you want to the finished project!

Am unsure of the style really but can offer some advice. The roof is oddly configured. Kinda looks like the hat Sally Fields wore in the Flying Nun. It's also odd that the rake the same depth over the bay window as it does over the rest of the house. If you can afford to have roofing work done I would consult with a local designer or a contractor to determine the cost of reconfiguring the roof there at the front. Really don't know what that configuration might be but I think the roof bothers me the most. I do agree with Patricia Colwell - the wood trim shouldn't be accentuated but should blend in more with the body of the house. That can be accomplished with paint. Revamping your landscaping will help lots as it is a bit out of control now. Good luck!

I think your hair looks more dense as well! So happy for you. Wishing you continued success! I'm sorry that the burning is still occurring. I hope that you can find the secret sauce for that as well. DS uses a broken capsule vitamin a on his eczema and psoriasis. It isn't a cure but it certainly helps him with the itch etc. Maybe going forward you could take a dry hair picture now and compare it next time as well as your wet hair pictures. Perhaps you could just mark down exactly how you did your hair and repeat that next time. Too much work? Anyway it's a thought. Even though you had different lighting in the second one I could still discern that there was more hair. I don't know if you want to try to get the lighting closer or not but I don't think it's a big deal personally. I do see what people are saying, comparing apples to apples is easier.