Disappearing Brunch Guest

9 years ago

I'd love to hear your responses.

We had a brunch for 20 this past Sunday. I made blueberry french toast casserole, coffee cake, banana bread, egg and cheese quiches, bacon, kielbasa dish, rosemary potatoes, huge veggie tray with hummus and dressing, several fruits individually sliced and presented, coffee, tea, mimosa, 4 types of soda, 4 types of juice.

Everyone arrived within 20 minutes of start except one couple who came an hour late (so some folks had, had seconds, but there was still plenty of everything and the hot items had been replenished. The husband filled his plate, the wife picked a few things.

The wife began complaining that she was hungry and wanted to go to a bakery. They asked my husband for his recommendations ( I was in the kitchen) and left. A half an hour later they returned which I find even stranger. I asked the husband and he said- oh you know sometimes people just want to eat what they like.

My husband believes that there wasn't enough food and maybe they felt like they got the crumbs. Since we actually had leftovers of everything, I disagree.

After the party, we received a lovely email from him thanking us for the invitation and what a lovely time they had. He mentioned that he learned I cook Thai food which is his favorite and hoped they would be invited for a Thai dinner.

I'm just perplexed by it all,

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Comments (7)

enduring
9 years ago
Unfortunately they both sound ill mannered. Can you imagine what Ann Landers would say about this? I would leave it be, and recognize that this couple has issues, unless you feel the need to help them improve their social skills.
newgardenelf
Original Author
9 years ago
I agree. I told my husband, I'm not in a hurry to prepare a time consuming meal for a couple who might decide they prefer Mexican that night.
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gbsim, you've cast the deciding vote! Thanks to you and lindac and Annie for relieving my 'guilt' over the whole dessert question. :) Guess my instincts were right but I was just afraid to trust them. My preference is also for 'plain' fruit, but I was worried that it would seem blah to everyone else. From your comments, I guess not. Teresa, something you said about that gave me a brainstorm. I have several dozen antique crystal champagne glasses that are really lovely. They're not 'flutes', so maybe they're not even champagnes, even though that's what my mother always called them. Anyway, they're wide-mouthed and shallow bowls on elegant long stems. I'm going to fill them with a colorful mix of grapes, melons and berries. They'll be on a separate 'dessert' table, along with an optional whipped topping of cream cheese, sour cream, sugar and Grand Marnier and some simple (but luscious) shortbread cookies. Omigosh, y'all have inspired me! Teresa, it's in Nov. Sounds so far away, but 4 months ahead isn't too early to begin planning, right? The weather here is incredibly unpredictable at that time of year. More often than not, it's really gorgeous between Halloween and Thanksgiving. Indian summer. But sometimes it turns nasty. I'm trying to think positive! I have also worried about the carb overload. But, hey, Michael Bloomberg isn't invited, so we should be safe. mjrdolfan, thanks for your good wishes! She's a lovely and *appreciative* bride, so it's my pleasure to do something special for her. I so understand your concern. But that's exactly why I posted here -- because I know how easy it is to get sucked in and end up leaving too much to do at the last minute and have it all go to hell in a handbasket. I promise that won't happen. You didn't 'throw a wrench' into it at all. You just reminded me, once again, how important it is to be on top of things. Thanks! sm P.S. Grace, forget the mimosas? Do you think I've totally lost it, honey chile??? :) Actually, the Bloody Mary's are what I'm famous for. Horseradish is my secret ingredient. But I've already put one of my ddil's in charge of the mimosas. And another is making bellinis. And a third is squeezing fresh orange juice. It's gonna be a partay!!
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Maybe they realized after they had eaten and felt better that what they did was rude, so they came back to try to be polite and make amends? It sounds like they were fine after they returned and sent a thank you note, which I find to be pretty rare these days. I still think the dinner invitation was a lighthearted attempt to assure the hostess that her food quality wasn't why they left. I guess I have a higher tolerance for people making etiquette mistakes than most people here. I always assume there's something going on that I'm not privy to and give them the benefit of the doubt. I'm socially awkward myself and I'm sure I've stuck my foot in my mouth a few times without intending to offend anyone.
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nancylouise5me
9 years ago
Of all the rude il-mannered guests! They actually came back and "dished" you a second time?? These people are weird. You prepared a wonderful brunch. Your husband is wrong. I'm sure there was plenty of food for these two to choose from. I wouldn't be inviting them back for dinner or anything else. Good thing I was not a guest at the brunch. I would not be able to keep my mouth shut if I saw the husband at work. I would ask him what he and his wife were thinking by behaving so rudely. How crass the were. NancyLouise
rosesstink
9 years ago
It certainly sounds like you had enough food so forget that bit. Even if it looked a little picked over that's what they get for being an hour late.

Have you been in the company of this couple on other occasions? It could be that the wife is just picky (or a pain in the butt) and her husband caters to her whims. Have you seen that in them before this? If not, there is always the possibility that something upsetting happened before they came to your house and the wife wasn't ready to handle the social situation. One never knows.
enduring
9 years ago
They sound as if they may have bigger issues then something upsetting happening prior to the brunch. People usually know themselves well enough to cancel an outing when upset. Your comments are certainly being gracious rosesstink, and very kind. I just think this couple have issues and I don't recommend continuing to nurture a relationship with them. It will be a painful one, over and over again.

Some years ago the husband of a dear friend told me how his family dined out. The parents would take the 2 children to a nice restaurant and ALWAYS one or the other parents would find fault with the food and send something back. The Mother was the main instigator I believe. She would make somewhat of a scene about the food embarrassing the children. I felt so bad for him, having to live with this example of anger.
gellchom
9 years ago
It sounds to me like either there was something going on and the food issue was an excuse to go away and deal with it, or else they are just plain weird. Probably the latter. How well do you know them?
I wouldn't worry about it. You didn't do anything wrong. I wouldn't bring it up -- it's not for us to school others in manners, and what can they do about it now? If they are as strange as they sound, they wouldn't understand anyway.
You sound like a terrific hostess. We've all had some odd guests. I'm glad they were only 2 out of 20 and it didn't wreck your party. And you got a funny story out of it!
marge727
9 years ago
We entertain a lot and from time to time we have had guests do some pretty strange things. My solution is always the same. They don't get invited back to my home. The fact that the husband requested you to cook for them again and told you what kind of meal he wanted, tells you that they are socially clueless. They should have offered to invite you over for coffee or something, you are not running a restaurant.

It reminds me of a party we had with all kinds of food & beverages, and one lady insisted we make her some scrambled eggs. I didn't even know her --she came as a guest of my friend.

Disappearing Brunch Guest

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enduring

newgardenelf
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Disappearing Brunch Guest

Comments (7)

enduring

newgardenelfOriginal Author

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nancylouise5me

rosesstink

enduring

gellchom

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newgardenelf
Original Author