murredduo Here is a thought to avoid simply walking away and having the lender foreclose. Simply give the lender the house. Have a deed prepared transferring it the lender as the new owner. Record the deed. By certified mail send the deed and the keys to the lender. Check with a real estate lawyer in RI to see if you can do that. Had it work here. The contract is if you don't pay, they can take the house --- so short-circuit it and give it to them. After you sign the deed and record it and send it, you no longer own it - the lender does and there is no one to foreclose against. (1) Thought you would qualify for the Medicare Savings Program through Medicaid - means the Medicaid program pays your Part B premium and picks up the deductibles and copays. Also your Part D (prescription plan) should have 0 premiums so long as you pick certain plans (make sure your drugs are covered by the plans) and you copays will be in the $5 or $6 range. (2) If you are getting a lump sum, paying off the credit cards and buying a small house with no mortgage is an excellent plan. (3) BUT - and here is a big 'but' - the idea of putting it solely in your wife's name (and your son ....a minor?) is not a good idea. Statistically 65-73% of people who become disabled end up divorced. The sudden poverty of disability destroys many marriages - even long term strong marriages have trouble withstanding poverty due to a spouse's disability. The better way would be to (a) Keep a life-interest in the property for you and (b) have your wife and son on the deed as the owners of the estate in the entirety interest with a reversion to you if they died before you. (That means you have the right to the property while you live and when you die, it goes to them and if you die first, it is theirs.) You really really really need to talk to an estate planning lawyer about how to title any property. If you have a life interest, no creditor will go after it -- can't sell that. If it is just tilted to you and your wife straight up and your wife is on the deed at all, they can file a lien against your interest in the new home but will have trouble foreclosing to collect on the lien because they have to give half of the money from a sale to her. If your son is on there, they only get a 3rd - not worth the trouble unless you all went to sell the house. (4) I seriously doubt that your wife can get a credit card in her name. She has not been on the mortgage and she doesn't have - and has not had - any income. She has to have a credit rating in HER name - not yours - to get a credit card. To have a credit rating that means she has had to have been on car loans or house loans to show she pays her bills. She also MUST have a source of income - your SSDI will not count for her income. About all she can get in the way of credit cards until she has an income and credit history would be 24%++ interest cards with annual fees of $75 -120 a year and credit limits of $300 -500. It will take her 4 - 5 years to even get up to a $2500 with credit limit increases. That is why not working, staying home and not having an independent financial life is a seriously bad idea for women. Something happens and they have to show a credit history or income to do something and they don't have it --- they do NOT exist in the financial world. Bottom line is she really needs to get a job -- it can be McDonalds, clerk in a gas station, retail clerk etc working part-time but work she must. If she does not work, she can not get credit for credit cards or loans. She also needs to be named on all accounts - like car payments etc (utilities aren't good enough for a credit rating). BTW having her on your accounts - 2nd card for a family member thing - does NOT get her a credit rating. The account is not in her name. Might be better to pay off the cards, keep them in your name and lock them in a drawer for emergencies. Just use them enough to keep them from getting cancelled for non-use like this month pay the electric with the card and them immediately pay off the card out of your income with the amount budgeted for electric. --- When the kids are all 18, your household size will drop to 2 people for the purposes of food stamps and a $25000 SSDI income will put you ABOVE the income limits for the Medicaid savings program and Medicaid and Food Stamps with a household of 2. (Assuming that is all straight SSDI and does not include dependent's benefits for minor kids.) Now when she is 65, imagine trying to pay for Medicare B for 2 people ($122 per person - $244 a month), Part D prescription plan ($45 a month per person -$90 per month), Medigap to cover copays but not deductibles ($135 per person -$270 per month) and the Part A and B deductibles (around $1447 per year per person - $2894 a year.) That will be $604 a month in just premiums and over $10142 for all premiums and deductibles (and not including drug copays.) That will be nearly 41% of your $25000 income leaving you only $1238 a month for food, dental & vision, clothing utilities, cars etc. Now if as I suspect that the total SSDI of $25000 includes dependents benefits for minor children - anywhere from 50% to 80% of what you are getting is for the kids - that changes when they hit 18 (or finish college at 21-22). So then when they are 18 (or until out of college at 21-22), your SSDI will probably drop to maybe $13888 -16666 a year or an average of $1272 a month. With just that income she could stay on Medicaid and you could stay in the Medicare savings program and both on Food stamps. At 62 she can draw a spousal benefit - but will take hit of around 25% less because she is not full retirement age (around 37% of what you get). At 66 she would get the full spousal benefit of 50% of what you get - and even if your SSDI drops because of the kids turning 18, her spousal benefit would send your income back up to over the limits for Medicaid, Medicare savings program and food stamps. Say she waits until age 66 to draw the spousal benefit * if the $25000 is just your SSDI and no dependents, then your combined income would be $37500 -- and you have to pay all the Medicare premiums, copays etc for both of you out of that. You are way over the income limit for Medicaid, Medicare Savings and Food Stamps of 135% of FPL for 2 people (right now $FPL is $16020 for 2 so multiple it by 1.35) * if the $25000 is, say, 65% higher than it would be because of dependents. when they are over 18 and she is 66, then your combined income would be $22727 - again above the income limits fore Medicaid, Medicare savings and food stamps --- and you have to pay all the Medicare premiums, copays etc. ($25000 divided by 1.80 = SSDI without kids + 50% of SSDI for her spousal benefit = $22727 vs Medicaid income limit of 135% FPL for 2 people of $21627) It is situations like this that cause what is called a "Medicaid divorce" so that people can keep their eligibility for Medicaid and get medical care because they can not afford the costs of other insurance. When you are planning, you have to think about how it will be in 10, 15 or 23 years. If you die before she reaches age 60 she has ZERO income. Nothing nada zip. Your SSDI will not continue except for any kid under 18 and then for the kids it would only be around 75% of what your BASE SSDI (not including extra for the kids) and are getting right now. At 60 as a widow she could get 75% of what your SSDI is (without the additional for the kids.) At 66, as a widow she would get your full base SSDI (assuming no additional for minor kids.) Right now you are at maximum income and benefits - Medicaid, food stamps, Medicare Savings Program etc --- kids leave SSDI will probably go down and she reaches the age for spousal benefits it goes up......and it can all affect whether or not you have to ante up the Medicare costs for 2 people. ANd again she needs to work if for no other reason than to stash what she makes in a retirement account for the future. If you have 2 adults and 3 minor children in the house, Medicaid cut off eligibility would be 135% of Federal Poverty Level - $28440 is FPL for 5 people. 135% = $38394. She could make $1000 -1050 a month (or $220 a weekly pay period) and not affect Medicaid & Food Stamps. That would mean $11000 or so to stick in the bank. If she does that for 22 years, you all would have saved $242,000 plus any interest. (Note her gross - not after-tax -earnings can't be anymore than that $1000-1050 in a month or Medicaid eligibility is affected for that month. If paid weekly, there will be 4 months with 5 pay periods and if paid every 2 weeks, there will be 2 months with 5 pay periods. Those are the typical pay periods for unskilled work - only kind she can get .She would just have to watch how many hours she is working a month - can't be full time) Bottom line is when you became disabled, life as you and she knew it ended -and that included the luxury of staying home with the kids and never working in a job. They can go to public school and she really needs to get a job. She is going to have to step up and get a job to help keep the family provided with electric, clothes and other basics. Living below poverty level (where you all are) is really hard. By getting a part-time job, she can ease that a lot - like increasing household net income by over 42% without effecting Medicaid and Food Stamps. Add in what would she do it if you died before she was 60 (some 16 years from now) and she only got $900 or so a month in SS benefits for the kids under 16 or got ZERO because there were no minor kids? Job - now - anything will do even stocking shelves. You are gonna need that money down the road. BTW adult kids living with you do not count in your household for figuring Federal Poverty Level.

Something that we bought ourselves. Something that we told the giver to get for us.

I used to work in a nursing home. I was the nursing office "do-whatever" for the day shift. Once, I had to take a form around to the nurses for them to read and sign. Of the eight nurses on duty, 5 were left handed!! That really surprised me and I did some research on that and determined that 5 out of 8 was a huge difference from the regular population. I went into the therapy department and again the numbers were much higher. My conclusion was the left-handedness and caring for and about others went hand in hand.

^ Haha....she beat me to it again (though I would have said love of golf). So along those lines, I'll say first crush.