Hey Kevin, We have a few resorts here in Va. Wintergreen is about 3 hrs away in the mountains near Crozet Va..(Charlottesville) The skiig/snowboarding is fun for Va...My son like to go to Snoeshoe WV..it's about a 2hour drive from his College (Va Tech) But my favorite on the east coast is Seven Springs PA...great place for all snow lovers...great for families... and has alot to offer...My favorite place out west is Whistler/Blackcomb!!! Talk about heaven!!! LOL !!! We usually see temps during the winter down to the low 20's and average temps around 40-50...We always say wait until tomorrow around here because the temps change and we can have snow flurries one day then 60 degress the next!!! Have a great day!!! Laura in VB

We just avoided frost last night, and the temperature is trending up again today, but not *crazy-up* like the first part of March. We had to turn the heat back on Sunday. We had strong winds last night, but our pears have held onto their blooms; they are full out. The magnolia is done for. The serviceberry seems to have put out an additional inch of growth every time I look at it! One of our Japanese maples is leafing out at the top. One of the first to start leafing here was our century-old American Elm. (Maybe it's just closer to the sun -- lol.)

Dyinginside, Your husband stated that it will end in divorce because of you and his daughter. one thing: HE SHOULD NOT DEFINE HIS MARRIAGE TO YOU ON THE BASIS OF HIS DAUGHTER . PERIOD. BIg red flag here. and to top it off he's not interested in going to counciling now????? I agree with sweeby, you have leverage, use it. You are in your parents home. If your husband thinks that is where its heading and he has made the decision to not change this direction, because he's the one who can change this or at least put his foot down and say to his daughter, she is my wife i love her , stop treating her like Sh*t, then there is only two things you can do. 1. Tellhim counciling now and work it out while being at the parents house. Cause counciling does cost and financially you'ld be in better position to do this... 2. If he insists on no counciling and stays.....tell him to leave with his daughter. My feelings on this: If i were under my parents roof, in this situation and my husband said, well i've spoken to my daughter and she still doesn't like ..and i guess if that is the way its going to be between you then i guess i'll have to divorce you....I would tell him, pack your bags now and leave with your daugther please. I would tell him , i know you love me and you love your daughter but if this is the way you think then its obvious you have chosen your path and you want your daughter and there is no sharing of you between me and her. Please have a wondering life and take care of yourself and yoru daughter...Give him time to pack up and go to a relative until he cna find an apartment. WHy muddle through a situation when your husband has obviously made a decision not to act and to pick his daughter? I know you are in love with him but maybe he needs to be alone with his daughter to form a relationship with her and he can't handle the both of you.ITs sad. unless you all go to counciling i dont think this will work. You will be left alone and resent not acting faster.

Yep sounds like a plan :-) We've had similar experiences with my (now) SD12 and SD14. It's exactly what Mattie says: SS knows it pleases BM if he has a bad time at your place. BM has done the same thing to my skids. By saying: "Are you ok babie?" in a worried voice and hugging the kids excessively they pick BM's anxiety up. "Something must be wrong, my mummy is so upset to leave me here". It doesn't take long to work out what the desired response is. And then there's the reward afterwards which seals the deal. SS's loyalty will be with BM simply because he lives with her and she's his main caretaker. It might make you feel better knowing that it's a normal and healthy response for SS. When I realised how it works I felt a lot better, knowing it's not personal. Because it's not. All you have to do is be supportive of SS when he's with you. I would stick to the court ordered time, as suggested by the other poster. And when he needs to call BM, or when she rings him and he feels bad after, have a chat to him. You can say "I understand you love your mum very much and it's ok to miss her. I'm sure your mom knows how much you love her, but we are happy to have you here too. I know how hard it can be, most of us do. Our BM does very similar things. She'll drop the kids off and keep them in the car in our driveway for a minimum of half an hour. Just to bring the 'goodbyes' and 'love you's' and 'miss you already!' to a hysterical level. Once that's achieved they can come into our house. Pfff. And (on a bad day) she'll call them 2 mins later while she's driving back, just to check if they're ok.. Again, pfff. You did say SS gets over the crying pretty quickly after he gets off the phone, so all is not lost! If you can comfort him and distract him a bit after then my guess is you'll be fine. Another thing I've learned is not to try and 'save' the skids anymore. My skids can do as they please at BM's, eat what they want, go to bed when they want, stay home from school, watch movies all day etc etc. At our place there are different rules, we eat meals together, they can't just grab what they want, when they want. We have a set bedtime and we don't rent 10 movies a week. But, it's unreasonable to expect the kids to totally change when they're with us. They are used to hanging in front of the tv, they don't play outside much. If this is what BM lets them do, we can't change that. Of course it's not great, but I can't save them from it either in the short time they're with us, you know what I mean? So we have to compromise. You could have a talk to SS, include him in the decision making. He'll feel more in control and less victimised. Also, he's more likely to accept the rules if he feels included in the process. For example tell him that you realise it must be hard for him to come to your place where there's different ways of doing things. And that you understand he sometimes wants to go back to moms because of it. Then tell him that you want to help him with this because you want everybody to be happy. Yyou could ask him to think about what he finds most difficult ("Do you miss your X-box, your friends, your favorite food/mums cooking etc"). Encourage SS to share what goes on inside him (hopefully he will). Then it's time to comprimise. For example you can tell him that the set bedtime is not negotiable, but maybe you can rent him some dvd's and he can watch one a day in the holidays. Or an extra hour of tv to what you'd normally do. Ask him for his favorite meal and if that is McDonalds maybe have it one day in the holidays, for lunch or dinner. Take a little and give a little. Good luck to you!