Well, I must say it is so nice to hear someone saying how happy they are. We all take things for granted a bit, don't we?
I am enjoying life everyday. My husband had leukeamia 6yrs ago and is in remission and doing fine. I had breast cancer 5yrs ago and again 1yr ago, but am doing just fine. It has made us appreciate everything and everyone so much more than we already did.
I would truly love to wish everyone on this forum a happy and content life!
Cheers,
Dee.

I too think it's wonderful for someone to say they're happy. Too often we feel or are made feel guilty about our lives, especially by those who practise self loathing.
I am happy that you are happy YQ. So please, rejoice in your family, home and garden, Christmas shopping and being reunited with an old friend. And thank you for your good wishes.

Isn't Happy wonderful ?

We are off to Ayr in the very early morning and have the Patrol all packed up with plants and gifts and goodness knows what to visit our Daughter and Grandchildren, Son in Law there too.
Friday and Saturday nights we will be amazed audience members at the Show of Shows, our Granddaughter's second dance concert so between then and tomorrow I know I will be sticking sequins and such on costumes and going to rehersals.
What fun, been looking forward to it since the first one last November.
We have wonderful neighbours who will look after our dogs and garden, maybe better than we do, as they just love coming over and seeing all the new plants this year, so they are Happy too.

Hoping, while we are away, all goes well with everyone here and your Christmas preparations are a great time for you all.
Marion

Marion that sounds wonderful, and I bet they will be just as excited to see you.Dee, youve certainly had your share in the last few years ,heres wishing you lots of fun with your Christmas preparations and Wattleblossom thankyou I certainly am rejoicing and counting my blessings at the moment.
I definitely feel happier when the sun shines and the days lengthen (maybe I should move to Qld) I think my good mood is partly due to smelling Jude the Obscure all day yesterday when weeding (that is one magnificent fragrance.
Cheers pam

I came to the forums to get away from things for a while. I just opened my mail box to find a letter from my SIL telling me all about her family's activities this year. How happy her uni student son & daughter were to be finished their exams, and how they had holiday jobs they were enjoying. Her letter was written on Sunday afternoon, only a few hours before the police arrived to break the news that her lovely son, our dear nephew had taken his life.
I'm so sorry to even have to share that, but I do have to share it, and I do need to read your happy stories to get any where near like feeling that life can and will go on again with any sense of normality. For us I guess it will. For my brother and his family - will it ever?

Oh, I am so sorry to read your awful news Sparaxis. How absolutely devastating for all of you. I don't really know what to say except that we are all here for you if you need to write more on the subject. I understand the awful feelings around a suicide because we had one in my husband's family quite a long time ago. The worst thing is that you beat yourself up about it thinking that you should have, or could have done something to prevent it. Chances are you couldn't have anyway. Please take care of yourself through this horrible time. My thoughts are with you and your family. Life can get back to normal if you want it to and you let it. It does take time though.
Hugs,
Dee.

Sparaxis, I am truely sorry to read of your loss. My cousin took her own life nearly 2 years ago ( just before xmas). The family struggled to cope and all of us felt such sadness, guilt and anger towards her at doing such a thing to herself and to the rest of us. Time does lessen the pain, but I live in fear that I may experience the same thing as I have 2 teenagers and 1 nearly teenager. I try and reinforce to them all how much they are loved and there could never be anything so terrible happening in their lives that the only solution was to end their life. But, as they hit adulthood they make their own decisions, and I hope and pray that the thought never even crosses their mind. Unfortunately, they are exposed so early in life as we have had more than a few young people suicide over the past couple of years, many being students from their school and living in a small country community most of these kids are known to us.
So much more time and money needs to be invested into finding why suicide is on the increase because we are losing so many of our young people. I get so angry when I see the money wasted on politicians and consultants etc in our health system because the money is so desperately needed to be put to good use.
Sorry for rambling but I feel so strongly about this topic. Sparaxis, hang in there and support each other and make sure their is someone you can talk to as well. Don't get caught up in the what ifs - its truely not worth it. It has happened, it was your nephews decision to do this and as Dee says chances are you couldn't have prevented it.
My thoughts are with you.
Meg

The what if's happened so long ago. This lovely boy took it on himself to 'parent' his hearing disabled parents and his 2 sisters. He would lay awake at night listening for his little sister (only 18 months younger) in case she needed him, and again later for his younger sister, and he promised them both he would always care for them. He had to take important family phone calls from age 4, and translate bad news and such to his parents. He also had to stay close at all times, so they knew he was safe. When he discovered himself, they saw their pride and joy turn into something they could simply not come to terms with. He had been brought up with a narrow world view, in a close nit church community, and as a young homosexual man, he was considered by his family to be 'bad'. The secret was kept 'safe' from us all until 2 days ago. Yes we could have helped and been there for him. We loved him unconditionally and will miss him so much and fear for the two girls.
There are things that go right back into my childhood relationship with my brother, and even into my mother's relationship with her unloving parents, that we feel contributed, but you can't go back there and change it all.
Anger is a big issue for me just at the moment. I can't help the family heal because I can't condone their disapproval and pact of secrecy.

Our thoughts are with you. Problems, to some people can seem so overwhelming that suicide seems to be the only answer. Your nephew had a load to carry and to him it seemed the only way to get out from under it. It is easy for us to say we could have helped if we had known but to someone having these thoughts, there doesn't seem to be a way out. Your anger will pass but the guilt your family are probably feeling will take a lot longer.

My cousin took her own life a few years ago. She had 4 beautiful kids and fostered many others, mainly abuse cases. She was a regular church goer and was always there for whoever needed it. One day she decided she had had enough and took an overdose. After she took the pills she realised her mistake and called a friend to help but by the time help arrived it was too late. Her children struggled for a while but have come to terms with it now.

Sparaxis what a terrible waste of such a caring young man,so unnecessary. I understand your anger.
Your brother and his wife have paid a terrible price, his sisters must be distraught.
You are among friends here.
Keep talking to us. pam

Jan - I am devestated for you. I read your first post about the young man committing suicide, my first thought was has he just come out about being gay? I have known of a few lovely young men doing this personally, it is just a sensless waste of life. Then I read your follow up post and my hunch was correct. It is just so horrible that they feel this is the only way out when their family discovers their secret and can't deal with it. We are all feeling for you.
Rach

Thank you all, and sorry for turning a happy post into a sad one. It has been a great help these last few days to just walk outside in the fresh air. My roses, and those in my Mum's garden are blooming well this year, and I find myself weeding, and allowing my mind to go blank for just a little while.
Thanks, Jan

Gardening really IS a great therapy Sparaxis. It has helped me through a few trying times in my life. I don't know what I would do without it. My sister is selling her suburban home and moving to an apartment in the city. I couldn't imagine anything worse! I really need my dirt and my plants to play with. Hope you have a good day.
Cheers,
Dee.

Well Jan this post has come full circle then because it was the weeding and caring for my roses that gave me my happy feelings that started it. Blank is good for you right now even to escape from your sadness for a little while. Im so glad you have that to comfort you and I bet your mother is glad you are there for her Thinking of you pam

Just opened this post and so shocked to find what happened. So very sorry, Jan, with the issues of *why* so weighty. May you find comfort for yourself and strength to support your nieces and other family.
Rose