Are they relatives or friends? Don't know where your are in SC but we lived there for over 65 years and people are not as friendly as they were years ago. As to the food, just contact one of the missions in Los Angeles, food pantrys at one of the local churches etc. Many of the places will serve the dinners or make up baskets. Yes it is a big loss, and I to would be both mad and disappointed. You could help serve or make up the baskets, and meet new friends. As to Christmas, just say you have other plans at this time and try to help out with others. Jut beaware, it takes a long time to develop friendships with others in CA due to many reasons. Feel free to email me and let me know where you live and I will be glad to help you our. We use to live in the Antlelope Valley, and I have friends and relatives in the Orange County area.
Marie now in ND

I would take them up and host the Christmas meal. I'm sorry your thanksgiving plans were a bust but at least you have the ingredients and utensils so they won't go to waste.

It's my step-dad and his family so we are close. He's stuck working up in North Dakota through the holiday, so it's not his fault. He was supposed to be back next week but it was delayed. I'm not mad at them as I know things happen. It's just disappointing.

Volunteering is a good idea. The one or two people who can still make it said they were still willing to come but mentioned friends invited them and they invited me come with them instead of doing a big meal for only three people. They also suggested I host Christmas instead when we can all be together.

I'm in Irvine.

I can understand that especially after so much planning and preparation, this cancelation is a huge disapointment. (I'd be secretly relieved, but that's me.)
Do you know a few local folks you could invite over instead? You'd be surprised how many holiday orphans there are and... sometimes people are hoping for another invitation, just as an excuse to avoid the family drama.

Chi83, I am so sorry that you are disappointed. I know that feeling all too well. A couple of years ago we went thru this at Christmas, it was the year my mom died. I guess everyone thought that it would be easier if I didn't have to prepare everything as I always had. So no one came. It was a horrible day but it was the last one like that. We now celebrate with friends that know a broken heart doesn't hurt as much when there is love in the air, and that love doubles as it is given away.

Chi, it's sad you can't host like you wanted, but please do Christmas. Everything you've bought already will keep and it will be so much fun for you and your family to all be together. Maybe you'd be comfortable taking up the offer of going to another house. I probably wouldn't, but that's just me. Wanna come to our house for Thanksgiving?

Off topic, but are you still on the liquid diet? If so, how are you doing?

The best Thanksgivings I've ever had have been the "orphan" Thanksgiving potlucks I've been to since moving to Seattle. Ask your friends and co-workers, I'm sure you can rally up some more people who need somewhere to go.

If not, I suggest volunteering also and just host for Christmas. There are lots of Thanksgiving meals for homeless and low-income folks out there. Or you could look at Senior Centers also. You'll never meet people more thankful for a yummy Tgiving meal, and many of them have absolutely nowhere else to go and nothing else to eat. A lot of interesting people to meet and chat with too.

Let us know what you decide!

Yes, please do Christmas. It really isn't that far away, and being together will make up for this disappointment. It might be possible to get a firm commitment from them without being too pushy. ;-)

One thing about your equipment purchases is that they'll last for years, though many holiday celebrations.

I think I will do Christmas. I'm just afraid that I'll get disappointed again.

I don't think I'll go to someone else's house for Thanksgiving. Mostly because I'm a strict vegetarian and most people use chicken stock when they make stuffing and such, and I don't want to ask strangers how they made their food, lol. It's just awkward for me and for the hostess usually because they feel bad that I have nothing to eat, etc.

Thanks for the invitation Patti, that is sweet. :)

It's just tough for me because I lost my mom a couple years ago to cancer, my brother is newly married and living his own life in Florida and my grandparents aren't well enough to travel and I can't see them this year. I think that's why I was looking forward to this so much because I've been feeling really lonely lately.

I've only been here two months so I don't really know anyone yet other than some casual friends.

Didn't you ask these people if they could come BEFORE you went to all this expense? I gave up hosting any family get-togethers years ago for this very reason. "Sure, we'll be there" turned out, at the eleventh hour, to be "Sorry - we can't make it this year". Now, it's just a quiet day at home by myself.

If I were in your situation, I'd find a little old family who needs a meal and take it to him and or her.

I say reschedule Thanksgiving - can you pick another date for the family to celebrate Thanksgiving?

I did confirm several times, but sometimes things happen and I understand that. In this economy, work has to come first over holidays, unfortunately.

I tried to reschedule but he won't be back in town till the 27th (driving from ND) and they already have plans to spend the weekend after in Vegas which I'm sure they made some time ago. I work full time so I would only want to do it on a weekend.

I'm going to do Christmas. I have no idea what people eat on Christmas, lol. I'm feeling better about it. I'm going to make a mini Thanksgiving for myself and enjoy not having to share the leftovers, haha.

I was going to suggest what Nycefarm did. If you're close, and if the reason is legit, they're probably as disappointed as you are. Why not pick some other day, before or after Thanksgiving, and have your own celebration, and use all the things you've stocked up.

Or, the suggestion of inviting some who need a place to go is a good one--lots of college students can't go home for Thanksgiving, or servicemen. My niece and her husband moved across the country from the East Coast to Arizona and have been 'adopted' by some neighbors for holiday meals--which is nice because she misses our big family Thanksgivings, etc. I'm sure you could find someone for whom a Thanksgiving invitation would be a real treat.

One Christmas, we spent the morning at the local AIDS baby hospice, instead of just indulging ourselves--it was a wonderful experience.

Maybe to relieve some of the pressure you could host a "Thanksmas" dinner. We've done that several times due to scheduling conflicts. We celebrate both holidays in one and try to do it on a weekend in between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Sometimes it even works out better that way.

Oh, that's too bad, but you are really ahead for whenever you choose to get together and have a great meal. Even the planning is done! Sorry for the disappointment but like your idea of a small Thanksgiving for yourself. Are there any lonely friends who would be thrilled to be included?

Your last post sounds much better than your first which means you're getting use to the idea. Christmas dinner can be pretty much the same as Thanksgiving. Some people eat turkey, some ham and some people like us do a beef filet or prime rib. It really can be anything you want. I'm glad you decided to do Christmas and also glad you're going to fuss over yourself. Moving is hard....it takes a good long time to develop special friendships. I hope you're enjoying your new digs.

Go for Christmas, Chi. I think it is just great that you went to all of this trouble, shows how much you care. I'm sorry about the disappointment, but you are right, they are probably disappointed to. Sooner or later that turkey roaster will come in handy and the warmer is always a good investment.

Save everything you bought and have a family Christmas dinner. Or, donate what you have to a soup kitchen. your church or Salvation Army will be able to point you in the right direction. I feel bad on Thanksgiving and Christmas because it's just me and DH. Our daughters prefer to eat with their boyfriends' families. And we no longer travel to Buffalo (450 miles) to see my family or to Albany (over 100 miles) to spend holidays with hubby's two sisters and their families.

I'm sorry your family couldn't come for Thanksgiving. I know how disappointed you must feel. If you do end up celebrating by yourself remember there will be new shows released at the Movie Theatres, treat yourself. Or stay home and watch something good on TV. The buffet server and cooking utensils will keep. Keep your notes on your menus, etc. because I have a feeling that next year will be a whole 'nuther story and you'll host a wonderful dinner.

Thanks everyone. :) I feel a ton better now and I'm looking forward to Christmas! I might even risk a little tree, which I haven't had since I got my cats 6 years ago, lol.

Greetings chi83,

Most of us are not enthused about having some friends who are shiftless.

Holidays should be a diffrent matter, however, as they are there for our convenience, and I think that one shouldn't feel too burdened should it be convenient for us to celebrate on a different day.

If your folks could make it on a diffeent day, not too far from the real one, wouldn't that suffice?

On the other hand - if you could find some orphans, living alone, that would likely turn out well, as they'd be thankful and happy to escape something of a dreary day alone.

Here's an idea ... maybe next year, should such a possibility be in the works, you could plan one celebration on the "real" Thanksgiving that the Canadians observe on the second weekend in October, when the weather's still warm ...

... that way, should something come up to scuttle that plan, you'd have the "real" Thanksgiving that U.S.ers celebrate to fall back on: Canadians say that's within spitting distance of Christmas.

(The designation "Americans" applies to everyone from north of the Arctic Circle to those resident on the southern tip of South America).

Hope you have a happy, fulfilling holiday, whenever you celebrate it.

ole joyfuelled ... with an occasional assistance in the fuelling by turkey

When I was little we celebrated most holidays before or after because dad couldn't get the holidays off (not enough seniority)

That said, now I compete with hunting season which is DH's major holiday of sorts. I often do Thanksgiving twice, once with my immediate family on Thursday and again on Saturday with the in-laws when DH is back.

Holidays are about spending time with family- even if it is not on the exact day. So accept an invite to someones home for Thursday and reschedule with your family for the next available date.

I am sorry things didn't work out for your Thanksgiving meal. Hopefully you can try for another meal soon at another time. It does sound like you have really planned everything and I understand you being disapointed, I hope you can get to serve your meal to your family soon.

Sue

I'm sorry, Chi! sounds like you are feeling better!
I'm gald!

My son moved to Chicago 8 years ago, and the years that he can't make it home for Thanksgiving, he and his friends, that can't make it home, have a Friendsgiving. They will be about 20 strong this year and sometimes the faces change but the intent is still the same. I hate that he can't make it home every year and it makes me feel so much better that he isn't alone. He even calls me for recipes.

Just a thought--you might try contacting Loma Linda University--it is a large 7th Day Adventist school and many of the students are vegetarians. Some eat meat, many don't and unless there had been a big change, they have many students from all over the world. Many are from India and other countries who are also vegetarians. I don't think Irvine is very far away. Any local 7th Day Adventist church could help you, or you could contact the University for ideas. It is a very good medical school. Good luck
Marie

I'm sure it's disappointing but at least there's good reasons. Still frustrating though. Kind of the epitome of anticipointment! Nonetheless, these days working is such a good thing it's something to celebrate it seems.

Definitely keep the gear. You'll use it. Try the stuff out for yourself. That way you can get used to using it too.

There's lots of things you can do. You've received many good ideas. I was thinking an "open" weekend or day for a get-together as an alternative. Celebrating your new home, people being employed, the sun rising or just friends & relatives.

One thing I'll mention though, on new appliances, often you need to burn them off a bit. My electric roasters needed it and it needed to be done outside. There was a definite smell of the coating on the components burning off. You do it one time but it can take hours. If someone took a new one and tried it for a celebration, in a closed house, with lots of family and friends around... could be quite smelly and embarrasing! Check the instructions. Not all need it, but some do.

Here's hoping that all works out for plan "b"!

chi 83..first you live in a great place and when we lived in san diego, and i was sad, upset, or whatever, i haeaded to the one place that can sooth you in a matter of moments...the beach...the one place i miss everyday here in mi...(that and mountains, lol)

look at this way...you now have a complete kitchen and i'd used everyone of those new gizmos...prehaps an late thanksgiving when your family gets back...

i think it's lovely that your friends are asking you to spend the day with them...enjoy...

Things are looking up! I think my uncle, who I haven't seen in a year, is going to be flying out to spend the day with me. He works for an airline and gets free tickets so he'll fly in Thanksgiving morning then leave at night since he has a cruise to make on Friday out of Florida (tough life he has - he just got back from a 2 week vacation in Europe!) We'll probably go somewhere for dinner, maybe Maggianos, then maybe the beach or something. It's not definite yet but I think that would be fun. :)

Thanks for all your well wishes. I'm determined to have a great holiday no matter what happens!

Bless you heart, I'm glad you'll be having a nice day with your uncle. Hope it's your best Thanksgiving ever.

There are so many different organizations that would be more than happy to have you help with a dinner.....Here, we have Meals on wheels, Salvation Army, several churchs also have a special dinner for those who can afford it or are alone.....It certainly would give you a lot of satisfaction.......

Me again. You are not far from Dana Point. Down at the marina they have some great restaurants, we have eaten there many times. You do need reservations. But it is so great, eating and looking out at the boats in the harbor. If he is flying in John Wayne Airport, that is not far.
Good luck
Marie

Thanks Marie. Do you have any specific recommendations?