Hi Everyone... THANKS for the comments! In reading some responses, it seems as though Medieval-theme weddings are common in Calif....but not here in New Hampshire. The costumes had to be custom sewn by a local seamstress. I didn't make the cake, although I do make cakes for family occasions. They got the idea for a medieval wedding while on a trip to Montreal....there was a store there with medieval things and theirs is a "fairy tale" romance (having dated in high school and friends in elementary school)....so the idea of "Prince Charming" marrying his princess was appropriate. Celeste

After watching that Robert Duvall movie, I think it was called Broken Trail, and one of girls in it had bound feet, I read up on it. OMG. One of the reasons they bound the girls feet was so sick, it's not repeatable. If someone actually wore shoes like these, Gwanny, their calves would never forgive them. Those are just too weird for words! lol

I can see how your feelings were hurt. I would feel very insulted if I were you. You have a right to those feelings. But I think you said it best yourself: "we didn't want any bumps in the road." It sounds like you have managed that very well so far. I think that, if you can manage it (I know it's hard), you would be wise to keep employing those skills now and try not to respond to this. Perhaps it really is true that they -- mistakenly -- thought that this was the more sensitive way to handle the situation. Maybe they had once been, or had heard of others being in, a situation where a family with friends and relations of lesser means felt humiliated when the much more lavish gifts of the other side's guests were opened, and were trying to spare your feelings. They ended up doing exactly the opposite, didn't they? But based upon what your son said, that was evidently their intention. Maybe sometime when an opportunity arises naturally to discuss this with your son and his wife, you can let them know that you aren't so sensitive about such things, and that you would feel more comfortable not to be "handled" even with the best of intentions. You actually said that it was your son, not his bride or her family, that you are disappointed in. I get that, too. As another recent (last month) mother of the groom, I can relate! I can only tell you that I noticed my own son bending over backward to try to understand his bride's family, their special sensitivities, and and their preferences. There were moments when we thought he was really kind of overdoing it -- but I am glad we didn't say anything. It was important for him not to be appearing to take sides, or something like that (I'm making it sound like there were conflicts -- there really weren't, it was more like he was afraid for no reason that there might be, or that they would be super-sensitive. In truth, they're not, and we all get along great.) If he doesn't calm down a bit about it, we'll talk, but I bet he will -- and I bet your son will, too. So I end as I began: I can completely understand your disappointment and sense of insult, and you aren't wrong, but I think you will all be happier in the end if you can let this go. Having a great relationship with the machetunim is worth a lot, and it's a wonderful gift to give your son.

I’m so glad you found peace Southern Summer ! I know it’s not the way we all visualized our blended families to be, but we had no choice but to separate & RE-gain our marriage back. I know that feeling & I am so glad your husband realized what was happening & found his way back to your marriage as priority & backed you, his wife, his future. I’m so glad to have connected with other SM’s who get it. Have a great day & keep smiling, there is a great life out here for all of us !