I love speaking in front of groups-- it is one of the few times I know people are listening to me (or at least pretending to!). It doesn't mean I don't get nervous, though, in anticipating the talk. One thing I find that helps is to continually reconnect to the audience-- when people feel like you are trying to apply what you say to their situation, it holds their interest. If you use notecards, keep what you write on to a minimum. You want to be sure they just trigger your memory, so that you don't get lost trying to read off of them. Most importantly, have fun. Really-- when people see you relaxed, THEY will relax as well. I also agree with the practice, practice, practice. My speeches are a million times better when I have practiced, if, for no other reason, that I know I have done all I can to prepare.

When I was a kid it was so easy. Mom and dad were still married and came from the same hometown. So a visit to the grandparents meant a trip to only one place. We would stay a few days with one side, and a few days with the other. It was great. When my parents got divorced it got more complicated. My brother and I had four Christmases one year: I drove home from college in Missouri to Florida for Christmas with Mom/granny; flew to Maryland for Dad/stepmom/stepbrothers; drove to PA for cousins; then on to Ohio for Dad's dad, then drove back to Maryland, flew back to Fla. and drove back to Mo. It was exhausting. Now I am married to DH, whose parents are also divorced. The four parents live in: California, Arkansas, Alabama and Florida. Oh, and his mom and dad can't be together. And my mom and stepmom can't be together. Then there are DH's kids and their own in-laws . . . it's like that riddle with the farmer trying to cross the river with a fox, a chicken and a sack of grain. Our Christmas solution? DH sees his dad about twice a year when he comes from CA to Ark. to visit his brothers and have a fishing trip. We used to go to DH's sister's (his mom lives on the sister's property) for Thanksgiving, but there was a huge family meltdown back in '04 that put a stop to all that. So now DH sees his mom on those same spring and fall trips to Ark. and we go out (with my mom) for Thanksgiving. My mom always gets the actual holidays, because she is single and, frankly, the most pitiful (I know, I know -- but it's true) and lives here in town. Dad and stepmom fit in where they can, usually coming up before or after Christmas. DH's boys are usually with their Mom on Christmas. We have DH's daughter and family over usually the week before or after Christmas, or meet them halfway for dinner -- and invite the boys to this. My brother comes in from Tx. some time around Christmas, but also goes to his girlfriends' folks in Ky. Whew! I'm tired already! There is no way the kitchen will be done in time for Christmas this year, so there will be a lot of eating out. There will also be liberal use made of hotels for visiting relatives, as my mother informs me that the cute little pull-out sofa-chairs I got from IKEA for the spare-bedroom-turned-home-office are not beds at all, and should be donated to the CIA for interrogation purposes.

The biggest reason to sew is also one of the easiest projects to succeed at: custom curtains. You can save a ton on curtains if you make them yourself, esp. if you have odd-sized windows. Pillows are also really easy; as are tote bags, scarves, and even an elastic-waist skirt. (the secret to pillows it to stop one stitch before the corner, and sew the last stitch of the side DIAGONALLY across the corner, then stitch the next side; this gives you really sharp corners when you turn it inside out. But if you aren't honestly likely to do that, then I'd seriously consider sending that sewing machine on to someone who could use it. In whatever way makes you feel comfortable--selling it so you don't feel taken advantage of; seeking out someone w/ few resources, like a college student or recent immigrant; or someone who'd value it because of it's contribution to their serious sewing equipment, like somebody who bought a serger and an embroidery machine but wishes she had a basic straight and zig-zag machine as well); or somewhere it can do some social good (like a nonprofit organization's sewing class, or the school, or a junior college, where they'd find it useful for teaching people the basic skills). . One thing about old sewing machines; the ones in the cabinet aren't as popular w/ most folks nowadays bcs you can't put them in the closet, and the older machines have very few stitches. They're workhorses, but they're basic. And most basic portable sewing machines aren't terribly expensive. So, start looking for a home for it before it gets even more obsolete. If the wedding dress has pretty fabric, it could become a christening gown (do you have siblings whose kids or grandkids might use it?), a pillow or three, or even a quilt. Martha Stewart Kids once showed how to do a quilt from a baby's outgrown clothes, and suggested KEEPING the details like the pintucks on the bodice, or the applique, or even the collar, and not just using only the plain expanses of skirt or trouser leg.

I'm sure I'll see bits and pieces. I do want to see the dress, LOL. I'm just hoping it isn't one of those hideous strapless numbers so popular now. It almost doesn't matter what body type you have - strapless aren't the most flattering. Small women often have the tops too big and not filled out. That looks sad. Large women often have boob muffins and back bulges. That also looks sad, LOL. And while I am not a deeply religious person, strapless is not the first choice for a cathedral wedding. Maybe later for the evening reception - I've heard speculation that there is more than one gown. Being married in Westminster Abbey, I expect the gown to have at least shoulders, and possibly sleeves. So I'm looking forward to a modern Grace Kelly sort of vibe. Simple and classy. One can dream, LOL.