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Need Advice

17 years ago

I am not sure what to do. I have been dating a Dad, father of two. In the beginning, everything were fine. The kids were good. As they got older, things became more difficult to the point that it started to cause problems in our own relationship. We had many arguements concerning the kids. My BF had told me in the past that his kids come first. We struggled and survived the relationship. This summer we had the biggest fight ever. We did not see each other for over three months. The very first week that we started seeing each other again, my BF went out with his guy friends Friday night. I was very hurt. I don't really know what to think anymore. I believe I still love him, otherwise I would not be crying over this. However, I am not sure if this relationship is for me anymore. I believe the initial kid period did a lot of damage to our relationship. I was second...and I can still feel that. His word is still hurting eventhough that was many years ago.

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Comments (2)

Vivian Kaufman
17 years ago
"The very first week that we started seeing each other again, my BF went out with his guy friends Friday night. I was very hurt."

Ummmm,....let's just say that I have a friend dating a woman who plays this kind of card on him a lot. He's been a friend to my husband for 25+ years. We try to avoid doing ANYTHING with them.
organic_maria
17 years ago
Drop him. This is not for you. First and foremost anyone who tells me his kids come first is full of Sh*t! You should all come together as a family unit. Its all or nothing. Its the parents that have to come first. period! You're not going to cater to your kids. yes your bf loves his kids but he also should respect you as well. I dont know what the fights were about but for you to leave for 3 months...I know you love him. But loving and living with a person is two separate things. And if this man will not stand up to his kids to have a relationship with you, then he is not the man for you.
Plus the first week you were back, he went out with his friends. That is basically saying he is in control adn he will do what he wants regardless of your feelings. The problem is not the kids. Its him. DITCH HIM!He is treating you second....he doesn't have to. My husband didn't. He put his kids and me equal but different. No one was better or deserved more than the other and that is how it should be.
maria
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