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ladyamity

Don't post pics? Why or Why not? (Long, rambling, sorry!)

15 years ago

**This is a repost. I posted it once (I thought?) but I don't see it so if it shows up double, just ignore. *smile*

If you don't post pics of your home, why not?

Noooo, I'm not being snarky.

Anyone who's read my posts for the past couple years knows I don't do snarky.

After reading another discussion board, and this being my 'home' board, I just got curious and thought I'd ask here.

I read a discussion, 3 pages long, last night on another forum.

The discussion was about posting pictures of homes, interior and exterior.

Yesterday I had read Persnicketydesign's post here about budget decorating and it sorta fit with what I read last night so I wanted to inquire here.

Actually the topic of the discussion on that other forum was not about posting pictures of personal homes but the discussion evolved into that discussion and I was surprised at some of the responses.

What I gathered from three pages of responses, and I'm not painting with a broad brush, just taking the general consensus from the answers posted to that discussion:

The long-time posters would rather someone not post a decor question if it doesn't include a picture. *ouch!* From being on this GW forum I can sorta understand as I don't do visualization very well. But can't see anyone from this forum telling posters not to post if they don't have a pic to go with the question.

A couple posters said they didn't post pics because they didn't know how.

Six posters said they wouldn't post pics of their home because they had done it before and got slammed pretty badly for 'showing off' or 'grandstanding' their huge homes.

The majority of responses talked about the security issue of posting pics of their homes.

They pretty much said if someone wanted to they could take bits and pieces from the many previous posts of a single poster and with a picture actually zone in on who the poster was and almost exactly where they lived.

I had never thought of it that way!

Then again, I'm the one that would post my home address just to get folks to drop by so I could have people with same interests to talk to/have coffee or tea with. LOL

(Mr. Amity jokes that when one of us dies, someone will have to hire Pallbearers because we don't have enough friends between us to carry the casket *grin*)

So, security for me is not an issue. I'm careful but not overly cautious when posting pics.

Quite a few posters alluded to not posting pics because they didn't have the grand or magnificent homes.

I'm with this last group.

I have the mass-market accessories, the oft maligned *grin* microsuede chairs, other furniture that the cat dragged out before it dragged in, heck, I even have the plastic on my new lampshade (for now).

I've posted pics here many times and always got great responses so it's not like I won't post pics.

It's just that the little I can do on a very tight budget just doesn't seem worthy of 'oooohhhhs and aaahhhhs' so I don't post whenever I've redone a room with a new paint color or painted-refreshed a bookcase/shelf/whatever or made a new vignette for my garden. It's just not that big of a deal to me so I wouldn't think it would be for anyone else. Also, my decorating 'style' is not the norm. Over the years the decorating has come from 'make do' so I wouldn't expect anyone to be able to relate to or even like my decorating. LOL

I'll admit to sometimes having a pity party of one. When I see the beautiful granites, the marbles, the beautiful woods, the gorgeous back splashes, yea, I sometimes look over at my own back splash and think "ewwww". Then I come back to reality and realize there are plenty of people who don't even have a back splash----puts things back into prospective and I'm fine with the world again. *smile*

Should I get to feeling a little down after seeing the beauty of homes on this forum I always look at the paper I copy/pasted and hung on the door of my refrigerator.

It was a response to me by FlyLeft awhile back. It couldn't have come at a better time and it inspired me, gave me the motivation to work doubly hard to finish my bathroom. Flyleft's words also gave me confidence--not having to ever make excuses again when family/friends come and see the latest decor/reno in our home.

FlyLeft: Anyone can buy their way to a nice bathroom, but you "hacked" (that's a compliment--from a pretty addicted Ikea hacker :)) your way to something that has dedication and energy and individuality in it and that functions great too. I just love that.

So, all this to ask --- If you don't/won't/can't post pics of your home, is there a specific reason?

Amity

Comments (66)

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I used to post here, pre-iV ownership, under a different name. (By the time I returned, I couldn't recall the details & we'd gone through three ISPs.) Back then, I posted links to photos of our house and several people made snarky or downright rude comments. It probably says more about me and my insecurities, but I recall those comments far more clearly than any of the helpful ones. I don't recognize those names here, so I don't know if they were sent to ride the tea cups permanently, or got bored, or found someplace else to mock people.

    I'd love to get advice on several decorating puzzles, but haven't posted photos for several reasons. First, I haven't taken time to figure out how (but I'd like to learn.) Second, I do have privacy/security concerns. Among other things, right after we bought our current home, I happened across a blog containing a photo of a neighbor's house and a diatribe against the "type of people" who were assumed to live in our neighborhood, complete with death wishes in the combox. It reminded me of the arsonists referenced on the deleted picture thread.
    I've found a few photos of this house (inside & out) on websites for the developer and some subcontractors. That bugs dh even more than it does me.

    The third reason is, I confess, we own a very large house. We didn't plan or intend to buy such a big house. We don't need all of the space and would happily delete several rooms if we could. But we did have very specific needs when I did a whirlwind house hunt and this is the only house that met those needs. Even though it's been a financial drain and we're feeling the pinch more each day, we're still glad that we bought it. It has accommodated in-home health care, large IV poles & wheelchairs, shower chairs, etc. while providing room for house guests, entertainment for the homebound and a restorative view. That's probably more than most of you care to know, but I'd feel almost obliged to post a rationale of why we live here any time I posted pictures asking for help.

    Finally, and this reason relates to the third one, I've read too many negative comments about other people's homes and decor, especially when the houses are larger than average. By choosing to buy this house, particularly when our medical bills are astronomical, I knew that I wouldn't be spending much on decor for a very long time. One bedroom got new, good quality furniture, because its occupant was going to spend many hours there. OTOH, the master bedroom has a combination of Sauder and HomeDec., a guest room is all Sauder, and several rooms are empty. We still haven't sold our former home. Since the medical problems began, our net worth has declined about 80%. Instead of buying more furniture, we've chosen to increase our emergency fund to cover mortgage payments in case dh is downsized. So we enjoy the amazing view from the comfort of an old microfiber sofa in the hearth room and the sunroom is furnished with a patio set from Home Depot.
    During tornado watches/warnings, we relax in the basement watching movies in the home theater that I didn't even know existed when I made the offer on the house (the builder had locked it & I thought it was a closet.) Eventually, I'd love to get help with decorating all of those spaces, but am afraid that too many would figure that I could just buy whatever (including an interior designer's services) so why bother offering creative assistance?

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Great post. A picture is worth a thousand words - and when it comes to decorating, I believe that is very true. I'm sorry that some people are uncomfortable posting a picture of their home because they feel embarrassed. This board is made up of people from a wide range of interests, talents, taste levels, experience and income. It's this diversity and generosity which makes this board so interesting. It's helpful to have another set of eyes helping one when decorating. I can appreciate other styles of decorating and the basic rules of scale etc. do apply no matter what you are trying to accomplish - so I would hope everyone felt comfortable sharing.

    DLM mentioned google maps- we're one of the cities where they sent around a car with a special camera to take pictures of the streets at the level of the car roof (you can see part of the car camera in some angles). I'm just thankful that my garden was nice and not full of weeds and that no one in my neighborhood were caught dressed inappropriately picking up the early newspaper. And of course in the satellite picture you can see great detail. It's all public now - and most of it has always been public only we just weren't aware of it until now.

    I hope everyone keeps posting - with our with pictures.

    Sky

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  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    OMG Val.. I can't believe they got a picture of you and your neighbor, that's crazy. I just checked google maps and the closest you can get to my house just looks like a big blob of green trees, the only way I know where my house should be is because I can see my neighbor's roof- see I told you I live in a whole in the wall town, LOL.

    ~~Veronica

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I just figure if someone wants to rob a rich person's house, they can just drive around an exclusive neighborhood and find one. Much easier than looking on the net.

    You're probably at more risk that a criminal would follow a woman, who was in an expensive car, home from the grocery store, than you would be from someone hanging around GW HomeDec.

    I think I need a nap...that last sentence didn't look correct. Where I was raised we'd call that "Milwaukeese".

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I think it is a shame that we have to be so careful nowadays, but that, unfortunately is the way it is. There are people in the world who would do you harm, not for your wealth, but just to be committing a harmful act. I don't think it is necessarily the size of your house that intrigues or entices them, but if they know where you reside.

    That might be a reason not to post pictures with house numbers and don't give the name of your town, unless it is NYC or Los Angeles, and they are looking for a needle in a haystack and never give out your full name and be careful with whom you network.

    I have met some very nice people on the internet, some of whom I have visited, from all corners of the USA and from Europe and have made some wonderful friends through GW gardening forums. However, I had communicated with them for a long period of time and we were meeting at a public forum the first time but friendships developed which I will always treasure.

    As far as those who bash others for their large homes, it is total class envy or jealousy. I think we should celebrate that we live in a society where we can achieve. Some will achieve more than others, but we all achieve in our own way and we have all been blessed to live where dreams can be realized and I celebrate anyone who has worked toward accomplishing such.

    Not everyone is going to have the same and that is what makes us "individual."

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I used to post more/better pictures, but since iV purchased GW I'm not thrilled with their policy. DH asked me a long time ago not to post pictures of the front of our home, even though it's barely visible from the street.

    Now, I link pictures instead of posting them in the thread (most of the time) because I don't want iV to do something with it. I rarely post asking for advice. I'm more likely to post a thought or suggestion.

    I don't post decent pictures of our home any longer. I posted a Shutterfly link of our home - showing rooms and accessories - that was enjoyed by many here until I was emailed by a GW 'friend' who said the link had shown up on HGTV's Decorating forum. I guess I live in a bubble, but never thought someone would post a link of someone else's home somewhere because it's not something I would do myself.......and yes, I realize this is the internet. lol

    I enjoy seeing all types of home at all price levels and would hope no one would feel they couldn't or shouldn't post pictures.

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    My father-in-law was taking out the trash when google was taking pictures down his street!

    To comment on the security issues, my 3 kids all had myspace pages long before I started posting any pics here. I could go crazy worrying about that, but I choose not to.

    That ZabaSearch is such a cool website! I searched for Daisy Adair, though and oddly none of my personal information came up. Weird!

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Yeah, what Patrica43 said. I've been burglarized before and that's not what I worry about. It's the crazies that scare me.

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    This has been such an interesting thread and every post so thoughtfully stated. I hope you know what good people you are.
    I strayed over here while a regular on the Kitchen forum and stayed because 99% of the people here seem to be very nice. Being an interior design major with a minor in art history I flat-out love every part of the design process. I realize that mine is a reasonably big home and that my budget is fairly comfortable but, trust me, I thrill every time I find a consignment shop or garage sale find for it . . . and there are many! I'm very proud that, all in all, I've decorated my home on a pretty darn reasonable budget.
    What I love most here is to see and listen to the creativity and thought process that goes into solving a design problem or creating a beautiful room. Big homes or small, large or tight budgets . . . I admire them all. I actually appreciate a room decorated a la Walmart or with garage sale or consignment shop finds more than I do one done on a huge amount of money. It's the choices you make and the personality you put into your rooms that counts, in my book. That's why I love to see everyone's pics. My favorite home of all that I've ever seen on this forum and the other decorating forum I belong to (Great Impressions) is My3dogs' home. She says it's small and not that special but, to me, it's a jewel box of rich colors, fabrics, textures and wonderful finds accumulated over a long time. It reflects her personality and her passions so much. Now that's a truly special home!
    I post pics of my own home because it's fun to share new ideas I've come up with or to ask for ideas from you all. It's fun to talk with people who share the same passion for decorating that I do. It's also fun to put our heads together to come up with solutions to other's decorating dilemmas.
    I don't look down on anyone who needs decorating help. Heck, I have four terrific sisters and three of them admit (and rightfully so) that they don't have much talent when it comes to decorating. But, they're talented in other areas that I am so NOT talented in! They help me; I help them. We enjoy each others' company . . . kind of like this place, too, I guess!
    I hope that this thoughtful discussion will help any would-be picture posters feel better about posting their pics here. And, if you need help figuring out how to post pics or links here, just ask. It's quite simple once someone explains it in simple English. That's what it took for me to get the hang of it.
    Lynn

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    google caught a photo of me from the back, bending over cleaning my driveway. DH found it and pointed it out to me. Oh, real pretty.

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Amity wrote: "I'm the one that would post my home address just to get folks to drop by so I could have people with same interests to talk to/have coffee or tea with. LOL "

    I'll be right over!!!

    I have no problem posting photos of my home. I have no problem with Google streetview. I think I'm the only one who Googles my own house... I'd be surprised if anyone else is all that interested in me or my house.

    But then again, I often forget to lock my front door at night.

    I have a BIL who's absolutely paranoid about his house, his car, his yard, his family, his bank accounts. His house is bristling with alarm systems, which in my mind, rather spoils the ambiance.

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    LOL Brutuses! Not your best side ,eh?

    I haven't worried too much about posting pictures. If people wanted to find me, it's not very hard. I'm pretty much an open book on the net. I just never worried about that sort of thing. I've had websites with photos of my whole family at one time or another. I suppose I probably should care more. ?

    I joined this community over a year ago and have gotten so much useful information and inspiration. It didn't matter to me if the person's house was big, small or inbetween. I still get lots of ideas from all across the map. Even if the house isn't really my style, I can still appreciate someone's hard work and excitement in their project. Quite honestly, some of the opposite end of my style spectrum is starting to creep into my house all because of seeing beautiful examples on GW. Posting a picture helps tremendously in giving/getting advice. I don't think it's a necessity but definitely a bonus.

    I haven't seen much house bashing for smaller homes or those on a budget. I have seen much criticism of bigger homes over the years. (not just the recent thread but many others)

    Bottom line though, I really enjoy this place and hope people continue to share ideas...with pictures or without!

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Interesting thread and timely. I love looking at all homes, big, small whatever, I don't care. I enjoy the community feeling of being involved in a group that has the same interest as I do.

    I would post more pictures and have a very practical if silly reason for not posting pictures more often. I'm anal about the room or area being "perfect" and sometimes I just don't want to clean it up and make it showroom ready to my standards to post. Now I'm sure many of you would say, we don't care about that. In my head I know that, in my heart, no way Jose! LOL Seriously, I post interior shots when I need help because it truly is easier to get help if you can see the area in need. As for posting exterior shots of the house, when I need help there I will. I actually never thought about the security issue.

    I am conscious about what I write here because I have googled my screen name and other things and threads and posts have shown up in the search results.

    All in all, I just want to celebrate the joy of decorating with everyone whether you have a dollar or a million.

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I'm not particularly concerned about privacy or security issues. And I'd love to post pictures. I have a couple of knotty decorating problems, and could use the help--sometimes a picture is the only way to clearly show something. But alas, I am a real techno-idiot, and can hardly use a digital camera, let alone download photos to my laptop, let alone figure out how to then post the photos here!

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Kkay, if you can take the picture, download it, get it on photobucket, we can walk you through the rest. I just can't do the pictures. If I had a photographer, I would be in business. Alas, my DH's eyes are almost as bad as mine. He has glaucoma. LOL. Our neuroophthalmologist asked if either one of us could read a phone book. No! Not unless it's in the yellow pages. :)

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I've spent most of my time here on GW over in the Kitchens Forum and recently posted our finished kitchen photos. I love our kitchen -- it is a dream to work in (and we use it a lot -- it is not a trophy kitchen!) -- but it ended up being about three times our original (and unrealistic, it turns out) budget.

    So in my finished kitchen description I told the story of our expanding budget and how I wished more people (on the Kitchens Forum) would share their costs so that those out there in the planning stages could get an idea what is feasible for $X, $2X, etc. I wish I had known what some of those glorious kitchens cost so I could have had a real-world perspective. It would have helped shape my remodel.

    99.5% of the responses I received were positive and supportive, saying YES, how helpful that kind of information is. However some people decided to contact me offline (via the "e-mail me" link) and take me to task for "showing off" and how redoing a kitchen doesn't have to cost that much (they wrote it more pejoratively than I just paraphrased it, but you can catch the drift).

    You know, I'm 38 years-old but those few (clearly in the minority) hurt my feelings! The "R" in rmkitchen is not for Rockefeller! (it's actually for rocky mountain kitchen -- I know, what a thoughtless id!)

    So that kinda made me sensitive to what I do / do not share here on GW.

    But then I also started receiving some "odd" e-mails again forwarded by GW. I was one of those who felt really comfortable here and shared all kinds of personal information (notably my youngest child's illness and progress), inc. photos. But these odd e-mails scared me -- yes, I may be overreacting -- so I removed all personal photos inc. the front of our house from my photobucket album.

    Okay, all that being said, I LOVE seeing everyone's photos. I love it love it love! I love getting a peek into people's perspectives and styles. There's a reason I subscribe to so many shelter magazines: I am a born looky-loo. It's true -- in addition to the gene for loving chocolate they also found the looky-loo gene!

    For me the poster's budget isn't an issue -- good taste can be had for pennies and crap taste can cost gajillions. Ingenuity is free!

    I'd like to think I could post my photos and ask for advice without being judged. We'll see!

    I'd also like to think I can post my photos without any security concerns ... we'll see about that as well.

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I love seeing the wonderful things the people on this fourm have done to their homes. There is some true talent here and I am gald I found this forum.

    I post pictures when I want advice and really can only give advice when I see a picture. I have a difficult time picturing stuff in my head unless the author can give a detailed account, but I don't thing John Irving is asking for advice on this forum - so show me a picture.

    I do agree that it is wise to be cautious. The internet is full of trolls and weirdos but I think we are pertty safe here.

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    When I ask a question, I try to include a photo (even though taking and posting a photo can be a pain). I realize that I am not a regular here. It is always more fun to "chat" with an old friend than a stranger. However, exactly ONE poster responded to my last question. (And I sincerely thank you, patricia!) My only other previous question received only a handful of responses and one was a little catty. So while I dont mind posting pictures, I think twice (actually 3-4 times) before posting questions because obviously my décor questions arenÂt very interesting.

    You can say all you want about little houses and small budgets getting attention, but I think that unless you have a home with pretty bones (and small can still be pretty), your decorating questions just arenÂt very interesting. I completely understand. My 70Âs home with paneled walls and "low" 8-foot ceilings isnÂt nearly as fun to decorate as a funky old cottage or new home with high ceilings and an open floor plan. My home is too old to be stunning and too new to be interesting.

    I still find tons of helpful information here and drool over the beautiful homes, both large and small. Later, when IÂm a little closer to "finished" in some areas, IÂll get brave and post more questions (with pictures).

    Nin

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    RMKITCHEN, several people who are friends have gotten strange and debasing remarks. Somehow, some of them figured out it was not even a regular at GW, but someone who signed up just to annoy and agitate. Some were even called by names not fit to come from a decent person's vocabulary. I think there are people who just do that to get their own thrills since their lives are so empty.

    I am very sorry that happened to you. You certainly have a beautiful kitchen and worked hard to get there and do not deserve such.

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I don't think I've ever posted a picture here, except maybe of my pup (don't remember for sure if I did that or not!). I am not a big *picture taker* and I am a somewhat private person. However,if I had a specific question about a room, etc. I think I would feel fine in posting a picture.

    I've never thought anything negative about someone having a large house (other than I'm glad I don't have to clean it!). We are all different and like different things. Our house is not small, but it's not large. There are just the two of us, no children - we have no need for a large home. I care much more about the feel of someone's home rather than the size. *My favorite home of all that I've ever seen on this forum and the other decorating forum I belong to (Great Impressions) is My3dogs' home. She says it's small and not that special but, to me, it's a jewel box of rich colors, fabrics, textures and wonderful finds accumulated over a long time. It reflects her personality and her passions so much. Now that's a truly special home!* I agree wholeheartedly with that statement. If someone felt that way after being in my home, that would be the ultimate compliment. I love My3dogs home and home like Cattknap and others. They are warm and inviting and so reflect the people living there.

    I do not post pictures of myself and/or family other than a small private message board I belong to (a small group of long-time friends, password protected board). And I'm very careful even there. I HAVE been approached in my job by someone who tracked me on the internet. Not in person, thank goodness, but I did get a phone call. It did scare me a bit. Thankfully, we do not use our street address, we use a p.o. box (street address is not listed), so it would be hard for someone to actually find our house.

    The comment about posting the cost of things, I can understand where you are coming from and it probably would be helpful to those in that situation, but it would probably make me a bit uncomfortable. To me that is personal or private info. I get a little uncomfortable if people here tell how they paid for things or how many accounts they have or this and that. But, I'm that way IRL too.

    That said, of course I do enjoy seeing pictures here. I also realize it is the internet and once you post a picture or link, it's out there and you should be aware of that when you post it. It's like it's not yours anymore.

    I too hope that people will continue to post here. I'm sorry to think anyone would have been treated badly because of the size or cost or whatever of their home, be it large, small or polka-dotted. Rockmanor, I'm truly sorry you were treated in that manner and hope you will continue to post. I'm sorry to hear of the medical problems and expenses and that just shows that people don't know what is going on in someone's life and it's never good to jump to conclusions or speak before thinking carefully.

    tina

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    Sometimes I have posted pictures, but usually through a link to a website where I keep my pictures. Since my website isn't under my current real name, I don't feel very insecure. It's a Tripod site, and they don't allow you to post with a picture direct - you have to give a link.

    I enjoy looking at other folks' photos. Most people are so general about where they live (i.e. "NoCal", "Maine" or such) that I'd never figure it out! Whether someone's house is upscale or not isn't important to me. It's not how much you have - family is more important than things, to me. Most everyone's posts shows how proud they are of their families - and especially the family pets. :-)

    I was not aware of Google Maps having that type of picture available. So I just went over to view mine. OMG, that was taken when we were redoing the family room - the contractor's truck is out front, it was trash day (so the trash cans were also on display) AND the Porta-Potty for the contractor was in the photo! I was blown away, so thanks for letting us know about that little "feature" online.

    Zillow isn't nearly so up close and personal like that, though you CAN see one of our vehicles from the aerial shot.

    DonnaR/CA

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    It's been a long time since a thread this involved and long has kept my attention long enough to read the whole thing (well, most of it). I feel uncomfortable posting pictures of my home because of my inept decorating ability. I don't feel I've always had this problem but apparently I have a large gaping hole in my head and brain cells are escaping at an alarming rate...thank you menopause and MS :o I have those "mass-marketing accessories" too. I'm always second guessing myself and rarely seem to get positive feedback when I do get brave enough to send pictures. I'm sure I'm way too sensitive. I was just telling my mom that my rooms/decor are "too predictable". It probably looks good to most but I see too many homes of people here that have that decorating "gene" and it can be a tad intimidating. I have nothing against large, elaborate decorated homes. I LOVE drooling over them and kudos to those that can afford such luxury :)
    Monica

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    Gosh I just learned how to post pictures on here and have become a posting fool. I need to be more careful, I guess.

    I love looking at people's house's and rooms.

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    If you all think we (GW'ers) are showing too much of ourselves, you should have gander at some of the Plastic Surgery Boards these days...they leave nothing private. Not only do they show scars in intimate places, they show everything, even down to the tissue that was removed on the table in the operating room.

    Weird...

    Susan

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    This is all so interesting. I love hearing about other's homes and feelings about this.

    I am sure you all know I post pics quite a bit. I am not so nervous about the security issue as I too think people can find you just about anywhere if they want to. Maybe I should worry more.

    On to the house size. 1st let me say, I LOVE seeing EVERYONE'S home. Whether it small or large, old or new, classic or or contemporary. I love the variety, the differences, the uniqueness. How boring if we were all the same.

    We are building a large home, you know I share pics cause I am just so darn happy to be moving into a home where we all fit. There are 11 of us in 2200 sq. ft. and has been that way for many years. We have worked hard and now get to build our dream house. I love it and sharing it. I hope to do so in real life as well.

    I have gotten a few snide comments for sure about how rich we must be etc. While we are comfortable we are just regular people, who are thrilled to be moving into a house I designed. We wake up, eat breakfast, teach our kids, feed the cats, garden, etc. all normal stuff. I sometimes don't understand this snideness, its as if because I have a large house people can be rude.

    I am the total opposite of what these people think for sure. But oh - well, I keep sharing pics and hoping I get to move in one day.

    I also keep looking at all your wonderful homes and wish we could all get together at each other's houses for some lovely food and great conversation.

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    I'll admit it--I'm here for the visuals! Particularly before and after shots--and it doesn't matter to me how big or small the project budget was. I've always loved watching homes/interiors being rejuvenated. There's nothing I love more than seeing a "diamond-in-the-rough" reset and polished to it's potential.

    Like others, I have a really hard time visualizing decorating ideas when people post without photos. Oftentimes I've read posts where someone has little hope that their space can be "rescued", and describe it as much worse than it actually appears when they finally post pictures.

    I have no problems posting photos of my interior or exterior. I don't really understand the security concern about posting the front of your house. It's done all the time on real estate websites for even very exclusive properties, along with maps to the home's area. I'm not sure how posting photos of one's home entices burglars. If I had valuable collections I'd be careful not to include any of the items in the photos, but that's about it.

    I will not, however, post photos of my children on the internet--for any reason, anywhere. Because of my profession, I've had a lot of training in child victimization and have seen how clever those who exploit children can be when it comes to using/manipulating images.
    I do not want even the faces of my children out in cyberworld being altered/viewed for child pornorgraphy--because in my mind that may contribute down the road to the victimization of some other child somewhere.

    When I do post photos, they're generally of "treasures" I've
    found on CL or at a thrift store. I love to share the thrill I feel when I stumble upon some old piece with great lines and lots of potential (like the vintage sofa I recently picked up on the curb). Most people in my real life have no appreciation for things like this, but I know there will always be people here who share my vision (and often see more potential than I even notice). This is why I also love it when others post pictures of their finds.

    The biggest deterrent to posting photos, for me, is the amount of time it takes to do it. Taking the photos, downloading them to the computer, uploading them to Photobucket, logging on and posting here, etc.--is very time consuming! That is why I really appreciate those who are willing to take the time to share photos with us.

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    Security wise, I'm not worried; after all, we let in plumbers and repair persons and they could be stalking the place, for all you know.

    I'm not finished decorating my new condo so it will be a while before I post pictures; the house we are selling was built in 2001 and I posted the link to the album many times, it's old news now.

    I guess I'm a little nervous about posting pics also because I'm not sure I want to hear the comments and criticism ; how vain is that.

    It's nice to see how other people live, it gives you some insight on them.

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    I post quite a few pictures (as I'm sure you all know). I learned SO much from other people's posts as we were building our home and I'm really anxious to help others out. I feel a great need to "repay" my GW debt, per se. I've posted interior and exterior shots, but I do stop at naming exactly where we are located and especially keep pictures of my family and their names discreet. Is this enough? I'm not sure, but I've never been a "nervous" sort of person. I hope that doesn't come back to haunt me some day. I also try to be really aware of what I say about people. Just what if my neighbor did recognize my house and I was bad mouthing them, or my GC! If I don't have anything nice to say, I try to keep it to myself.

    As far as seeing other people's homes, I LOVE it! The little ones, the magnificent homes, the old ones, the news ones, the homes in different areas, different styles, everything. It gives me a little bit of perspective on how people all over live and is a wonderful source of ideas and inspiration. So, I'm grateful to all of you have so graciously "opened up your home" to my interloping eyes!

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    teeda I have to say, this gave me a bit of a chuckle this morning over coffee.......

    "The biggest deterrent to posting photos, for me, is the amount of time it takes to do it. Taking the photos, downloading them to the computer, uploading them to Photobucket, logging on and posting here, etc.--is very time consuming! That is why I really appreciate those who are willing to take the time to share photos with us."

    Back in the old days at BHG they didn't have a way to add pictures to posts unless you used the HTML codes AND!!! digital cameras weren't a fact of life (maybe they didn't even exist - I can't remember!) so we took our pictures and had them DEVELOPED then had to SCAN them before typing in the HTML gobbledy-gook!!!! Sometimes I think, oh I don't have the time, energy, interest to get a picture up here and then I remember what it used to be like and slap myself!!!

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    I used to belong to a political forum -- talk about getting flamed for stating an opinion, even a mild one! Many of the people were just downright cruel and they could really gang up on you there. It really upset me, online and in non-cyberspace life, so I had to quit. That was a few years ago but at the time it came very clearly to me that I should have heeded the childhood warning my mother gave me about not talking to strangers.

    Now I find this forum to be much nicer and many people have been very kind to me. Decorating isn't as inflammatory as politics.

    I don't post pictures because I don't know how and I'm not sure I want to do what it takes to do it. I am security conscious, and do not think ANYTHING is free, especially on the internet. Free screensavers, software downloads, etc. -- you are going to pay for it one way or another, probably with the sharing of your information at the very least. So I never click the "download" button when some offer to upgrade or add software appears. I read here about using photobucket, went over there, and was not comfortable with their "free" service, and that is why I am unable or unwilling to post a picture.

    I would really like to post my staircase so McClark and others can give me their opinion about painting it! Having said that, however, I would never post anything that I thought could divulge my real identity or address --not because of the good people I've met here of course, but because of wierdos with wrong motives.

    Oh my gosh! I didn't know about googlemapping, just did so for my address and there it was -- a thumbnail of the front of my house (nobody bending over in the photo though, thank goodness, LOL.) I clicked to see a larger photo and guess what? I needed to download an upgrade of Adobe to view it. Right.

    It is helpful to come here for advice, and fun to give it to others, and I think everyone appreciates being acknowledged for their contribution no matter who they are. Often I go on a thread and realize I have nothing to offer to the situation, or that what I have to offer might not be appreciated, so don't say anything. So if you post a question and nobody answers, it doesn't mean your question was dull or stupid, just that no one at that moment had anything to bring to the issue. Don't take it personally. I've seen someone add their own comment, "Anyone?" to bump it back to the top, and thought that was a good idea.

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    I just want to add I am rare poster, freq lurker and enjoy this site so much. I marvel at how much help people posters give some people. The pictures make it possible for you talented ones to help pull a rm together. I especially love the photoshop work some of you do.
    I look forward to seeing what so many of you have done. When we finish our renovation (1870) I will post some pictures too.

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    I LOVE looking at everyone's photos and hope this thread does not discourage anyone from sharing more. We are at the end of our design stage of our "forever house" so it will be a while before we break ground (18 mos) and before I can share photos but I look forward to learning as much as I can to making my home as lovely as all of yours'! Cheers!

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    Acountryfarm, with 11 I don't think your house is too big at all! Goodness, I can't imagine you living in 1100 sq. ft. that's for sure. Fooey on those people who make rude comments. They are just jealous. If you worked hard to get your home, why shouldn't you have it?

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    Decorating isn't as inflammatory as politics

    Oh, I bet I could name a few topics that would positively light up the boards..... LOL!

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    ...a few topics that would positively light up the boards.../>

    Renofan -- like what?

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    I post pictures -- Because if I don't, how will I get the help I'm asking for? Our house is kind of 'different' and the 'look' I'm going for is hard to nail down in words. But I can show it with a picture and then the decorating gurus here can work their magic. And they sure have! I posted a thread on my 'not up to its potential' living room, and the advice I got was incredible! In two days with me spending only $125, the room went from 'OK' to "WOW!" And without pictures, it could never have been done.

    On security issues -- I try never to be so nasty here that someone would find it worth the effort to hunt me down and hurt me! ;-) (Even if they're good at PC detective work.) Actually, I try the same thing in real life, since it's so much easier in real life to hunt me down and hurt me, if someone were so inclined... As far as theft-worthy items go, everyone in my neighborhood has something "worth stealing" if that's the way your mind works. I imagine my antiques and artworks are about average for my neighborhood, and to the extent that they're not -- then I'd use some discretion.

    Can someone find out who I am? Sure -- But I'm not interested in hiding that. And if someone wanted to 'out' me, it wouldn't rock my world. In fact, I've met and become real life friends with several GardenWeb regulars. It's pretty clear from our online chats that the majority of us are adult women between 30 and 60 -- so a pretty 'safe' demographic...

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    I like to post pictures of my home. I frequently post pictures of my children on another board I belong to, as well. I like to think I'm not careless about my privacy, but I'm not overly concerned, either.

    As for google earth, the last time I checked it, they didn't have our subdivision added. The pictures show an empty field, while our road has been here for five years and we've lived in our home for three!

    Carrie

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    I'm sorry to hear that anyone have been flamed for posting pictures (be it large or small). This is good that this has been brought up (esp. the larger homes) so we can all be more sensitive. One of the things I do like about this forum, is that people are more forthright about offering their opinions than IRL. Constructive criticism can be a good thing, though only if the poster is asking for it. I've learned so much and enjoy the decorating process as much or even more than viewing pictures of finished rooms.

    As some may already know, one of the things the kitchen forum has done is compile a FAQ for new posters to help them not only navigate the process of remodeling a kitchen, but to make the most of using their forum. Below is a link to their instructions (courtesy of starpooh, who has spent countless hours not only compliling this, but a whole blog of actual finished kitchens) for posting pics on the GW. I do understand the difficulty of learning the process to add pictures, since I've not yet taken the time to learn to do links!

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    Bigdoglover, don't ask. Reno is right.

    When I began reading this thread, my first thought was, "Oh no. Not again!" since many have been very vocal and downright confrontational at times over this topic. But like someone else already said, I've found it a very interesting read and I like the way everyone has phrased their responses. Plus, I've got a little new insight into some people's thinking on the subject.
    I also found a strong connection to R's comment about some input she got when she posted photos...

    "It probably says more about me and my insecurities, but I recall those comments far more clearly than any of the helpful ones."

    Long ago, on BHG Decorating, (where I first 'met' DLM2000, Lynninnewmexico, GeorgiaGal, and more) someone trying to stir trouble on the board posted a comment along the lines of "Red's tiny little house attached to the Big garage". I thought I was impervious to internet insult, esp. from a poster that wasn't a regular or who was noted for any kind of helpful remarks, but I removed my exterior shots and didn't post any more for a long time. So, I do get why some might feel hurt if they get hit with unkindness. Sometimes I guess that those of us with thicker skins, or maybe even more confidence about what we do with our homes, might be a little insensitive to other's concerns. I know I am.

    Deb and others remarks about google searches are right on the mark. In most areas someone can see your home anyway if they wish to find it for some unearthly reason. Another poster commented about letting tradesmen into your home. I do confess that I believe there are a lot more dangers from the carpenter's helper who did your kitchen cabinets, your teenager's more low-life friends, or even the carpet shampooer salesguy who stood at your entry trying to talk you into a free demo while sizing up your visible flat-screen tv and badmommajamma stereo system in the adjoinging family room. Plus, we do need to think about the WHY of someone trying to find us. After all, our neighbors can find us. The paper delivery guy can find us. The phone installer can find us. And we wish the pizza delivery guy could find us a little faster. So if security is a concern about posting a close up of the recliner fabric or the hardwood flooring or the bathroom valance......not only consider whether you have given enough info for someone to stalk you--(This is my new Flexsteel sofa with my 27" flat screen t.v. in the background. I love my little home at 12345 Lavender Lane, Cowberry Hill Ca., 93777, and if I wasn't leaving the state for 11 days starting on August 28th, with my front door key in the mailbox, I would be posting another shot of my insane jewelry collection!)--but also about the likelihood.

    Confession time now for Red. I LOVE the photos in the posts. I have DSL (Stalkers--pay attention!) so it's a pleasure thumbing through posts looking at pictures. Allison's comment about posting a link and her reasons why make sense, so I see why sometimes I need to click on a link. But just like anyone else here, I am drawn to certain photos. When I buy Decorating magazines, I don't look too much at the ones with the big lavish fabuous homes and I don't buy the ones with the Country Crock feeling with gingham and ducklings either. (Those used to be my favorite but that 'Red' has new loves now!) I look at more middle of the road stuff. I like the shots of gorgeous kitchens with cooking islands and miles of cabinets, but I gravitate to the ones that are....
    ...Wait for it.....more like what I'm trying to do at my house. I like photos that show rooms nicer than mine. I like photos that have great ideas. But they need to be ideas that I at least have a prayer of copying. If one of you out there posts a photo of a new dining set that set you back $13,000.00, I may compliment you on it, but I am far more likely to get excited about the one somebody else posted that they got for $130.00 at a garage sale. Why? Because I could do that. I could totally do that. And I don't begrudge people their bigger houses or their bigger budgets. My own home is twice as big as the one we lived in when we got married. (Trailer.) My budget is ginormous compared to my 25 year-ago budget. But this is why no one should feel that their photos don't matter. Some of us are a little predjudiced towards the less-fancy stuff because it feels within our own grasp. And I am assuming that some of you great girls that have a little more to build a little more are totally intrigued with some of the shelter magazines and homes that reflect what YOU are hoping to do.

    And right here and now, I want to apologize to anyone who has ever felt 'slammed' by another poster for putting their photos out there. If you were mocked for building a chair out of packing boxes draped with a flowered sheet, I am so sorry that some of us couldn't realize how proud of that chair you were. That it's darned hard to put a cute house together when there's barely enough money to put gas in the car for work and taking the kids to school. And that when Red says, "It's only paint! Go get a couple of test quarts and slap them on the wall to get the right shade!" She is NOT thinking..........she's not thinking that you may only have $20 total to buy paint. Try not to let it hurt you and try to forgive Red for being insensitive.
    And if you got slammed for your Grand House, and heard some muttered "McMansion" comments.........I am sorry for that too. Seriously. I've not done the slamming, but boy, I've certainly thought the thought to myself. You know the thought. Why does she even want our decorating help? Why doesn't she just hire a decorator to fill her 14,000 square feet and be done with it? Well, reading Rockmanor's story really had me cringing. I do sometimes judge other people's thinking by what I see them buying. That is so wrong.
    So, all of you who like to do photos, keep them coming. And those of you who feel like you just don't want to, well, we're still gonna want to see, but you don't have to feel obligated to show.

    Red

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    Red, you are my hero. :) heroine?

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    Amity, I am so glad that you started this thread. I was just about to go away & delete GW from my favorites list after reading the fuss on the pictures thread. It was too depressing. But today, I am choked up over the responses people have posted and the willingness to consider varying POVs and circumstances. I hope it's okay if I specifically mention Tina and Red; thank you both for being so understanding.

    After reading this thread, I am encouraged to learn how to set up a photo account that I can link to when I ask for advice. Allison, I like that idea very much. Would you (or anyone else) please suggest one to use? Does anyone know if it's possible to link to a Kodak easyshare album? If so, I'll make a point to learn how to do that.

    As for the whole security issue, here's my take on it. I am not worried about burglers. We have very little worth stealing, since I don't own any costly jewelry. We do have an alarm system that is on pretty much 24/7, but that's more about personal safety than things and it's probably overkill. However, we have experienced unsettling incidents, including worrisome behavior by some people dh had to terminate for cause and stalking by a nutcase who threatened our children. I now have a concealed carry permit. Our ph # is unlisted, google maps shows our lot as empty & is about 6 yrs. out of date on the neighborhood, and most of websites I've found that have info on us are 2 - 3 houses behind the times. Since one looney already put a lot of effort into finding us, I don't care to make it easy for him or anyone else to do so again. So I will stick with interior photos or backyard photos that don't identify the house.

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    Rock, if you go to photobucket and sign up there, you can access whatever photos you have on your computer.

    I have a big house also and would really like advice from the people who do so much with craigslist and garage sales, ebay etc. With new construction it's really hard to make it look homey. My GW friends chime in but they are always kind. We're on a budget and though we have a few good pieces, most of it is cr*p.

    I had to shudder reading your last post. DH just had to let go of an employee for cause and I'm a bit nervous.

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    Parma42, I'm sorry if I worried you. It's very rare for someone to react violently to being terminated, it's just that the ones who do make a big splash on the news. However, if your dh's former employee even hinted at retaliating, please contact your local law enforcement and ask their advice. Maybe a restraining order would be appropriate, or maybe the officers who patrol your area will drive by a couple of times each shift just to check on your home.

    Our homes should be our sanctuaries and no one should disturb our peaceful enjoyment of them.

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    I don't think any one should be afraid to post a picture because we come from all walks of life and have had different things happen in our life that also affects the home we choose. I love looking at them all and have found some styles that I like that I thought I never would. As far as people making nasty comments I think that it should just role off your back because I have had a few run ins without pictures of people that didn't agree with my opinion (not on this forum). I was always taught that if you can't say any thing nice to be quite.

    My neighborhood isn't on google maps yet so now I need to get busy weeding before they get here. It has been raining for a week and can't even get out side when it stops because the mosquito's get you.

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    Great posts...

    I have not posted much recently, as I do not have any decorating projects going on. Mostly I shared what I was doing to show that you can get amazing results with low budget. I still get e-mails about my stained concrete projects about once a month and I am happy to answer any questions to help folks to complete their projects.

    I do not worry about posting photos, we are behind closed gate, so you either have to climb the fence to get to us, if you are not expected and then we have two big dogs greeting you ;)

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    For those of you who are not on Google maps yet, I can almost bet you that you're on Google Earth. They update that one every 6 months or less. We still aren't on mapquest, google maps etc (one year old street) but we are most definitely on Google Earth. Those are some close up shots too. You might have to download it but it's free.

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    I am probably not going to be posting many pics when asking questions any more because I find that too many people are only looking at the pictures, NOT reading the text, and thus their responses are either directly contrary to something I've said in the text (for instance "get rid of XYZ" or "the color of ABC is wrong" when I've already said in the accompanying that I love XYZ so it's not going anywhere or that the color of ABC is really more toward mauve when it shows up as puce in the picture) or have nothing at all to do with what I'm asking. I find that intensely frustrating.

    I have almost no pictures of my current house because it's still in "whatta dump" stage. No paint (walls need a TON of work), short on furniture, dreadfully designed kitchen that's a perpetual mess because there's nowhere to put things... and forget outside pictures, a few weeks ago we ripped out almost every trace of vegetation outside (and will not be replacing it until next year, probably fall '09 to get the end-of-season sales) due to a honeysuckle invasion that I swear was growing by feet per day and was starting to attack the porch. I'll happily post pictures of my previous house because I think I did a pretty decent job with it.

    We're not on Google Maps but we're kinda-sorta on Google Earth - but the best you can get is a fuzzy whitish blob in the midst of a bunch of other fuzzy whitish blobs on a fuzzy grayish stripe. No closeups. Our town is clearly not a high priority as far as Google is concerned! WRT security - we live in a somewhat iffy neighborhood so I am one HECK of a lot more worried about the people a dozen houses down the street breaking in looking for meth money than I am about someone trying to track me down via the Internet (I Googlebate every so often just to see what's out there re: me) from half a dozen states away. I've been email-stalked and -harassed a bunch of times in my 18 years online because of my outspoken ;-) opinions and my ISPs have always been helpful in dealing with it. However, I've had meet-ups with a whole slew of people I've met online over the years, twice flying nearly cross-country to do so, and it's been grand fun.

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    I find that too many people are only looking at the pictures, NOT reading the text, and thus their responses are either directly contrary to something I've said in the text (for instance "get rid of XYZ" or "the color of ABC is wrong" when I've already said in the accompanying that I love XYZ so it's not going anywhere or that the color of ABC is really more toward mauve when it shows up as puce in the picture) or have nothing at all to do with what I'm asking. I find that intensely frustrating.

    Mari, that's my biggest deterrent also. I'll only post pics when I've girded up me' loins for the inevitable comments that are *exactly* like what you describe. There are times that I want to post a question, but then I hit "delete" because I'm not in the mood to have the whole room picked over, but rather just want an opinion on one little element.

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    last modified: 9 years ago

    Yes mari, that happens often.

    One of my first posts (I had just learned how to add a pic) was when we had just moved in. I said that the big plant was a housewarming gift that I had just plopped on a small table for the time being. The first thing a responder said was that the table was too small for the plant.

    Oh well, as my DD is so fond of saying "any attention is better than no attention". lol

    I just expect it now and it really doesn't bother me.

  • 15 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I always use links to post my pics and I have found despite some negative comments, the helpful criticism and suggestions have helped me a lot. Based on suggestions for my bedroom lamps, I replaced my brass lamps with crystals lamps and realized that as long as the styles and shades were similar they did not have to match perfectly. I love my new crystal lamps in my bedroom and I moved the satin brass lamps to my guest room. I thank most of you for this change of mine.

    Les was right that a small night stand was not good for a TV to sit on in my bedroom. This made me realize when returning the damaged Stanley set that I would buy a smaller dresser so I could fit a small Armoire in my bedroom. I love my Armoire so much and I thank members of this forum for helping me make this decision also.

    Members of this forum helped me accept the linen color honeycomb blinds in my bedroom and stop wishing I bought white ones. Squirrel's comment that the Sensations Sheers were peaceful while the lace may be beautiful but was not the peaceful look I was striving for in my bedroom was what I was thinking also so despite the majority liking the lace sheers, I realized I liked the peaceful look and choose the Sensations sheers in the white (the lace white was too bright while the semi-sheers in the crinkle look material was like an off-white and soft)which softened my linen Duet blinds that I now love.

    Hence, posting pics was very helpful to me despite knowing my home was not as beautiful as most homes that had pics posted since I live in a townhouse due to the high cost of living in my part of the country and my desire for square footage space.

    What is difficult is when posting pics, some people seem to think there are other ways to arrange furniture which is nice and helpful but sometimes it is impossible and I try my best to explain why my home office really can't have any other set-up than what I now have and I feel that my time was wasted since I got no more comments despite all the new pics to explain why things are the way they are.

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