Nope, you ain't alone...LOL

I used to post here a lot more, but not anymore. I don't have time to wade through all the crap.

Actually, I have yet to find a forum where I seem to fit in. This one is too antagonistic and the childless stepmom forum is WAY too whiny and self-involved. I actually really love my stepkids and consider them an asset as opposed to something that has to be tolerated just because I married my DH.

Anyway, I totally get it. Carry on.

Every topic deviates from the original and gets totally off course with out any help to the original problem.

If you're a new poster ... and you post something you have a genuine problem with by the end of the post some of them figure out their lives are pretty good and stop posting.

And thankful they are not dealing with certain BM's on this forum ... :)

I have stopped posting "my issues" here because tired of being told I am wrong ... it doesn't matter what I do as a SM I can't do anything right ...

I see, and I do it myself quite often, something thats hits a note with me, and a stream of conciousness follows, which leads to another from someone else, but unless you label your advice 1.2.3.here is your answer, I m not sure you can do otherwise..Antagonistic, yes, but I ve noticed when you have 1.2.3. answers, post ends, antagonistic often go to 150 posts...If you are so stringent that the posts are useless and you cant wade thru,no time, dont..Take what you can use and leave the rest....Really, not up to one, or a few posters to edit what someone wants to say..Guess its relavent to them, and they think its relavent to the post

Yes, I agree...see my post this morning to helpwiththis regarding her 11yo stepdaughter.

It's disheartening to see all the BS that gets posted...and it ALWAYS seems to come from the same few people, who CLEARY have nothing in common with the OP.

Enough said.

Since I seem to be the 'new kid on the block', coming here with a problem only a few days ago, I'll comment too. My view is fresh, I have no opinions formed about the posters. As a matter of fact, I can hardly remember their IDs.

My question received 87 replies. I was astonished. Some came from one corner, and there were posts that were from another slant.

What I was impressed with was the ease of relating here. Sure, some didn't agree with what the previous poster(s) said, and they addressed it. It was apparent that they knew each other from here and had formed an opinion on that person's 'style'.

I found it refreshing. It was a debate of sorts and reminded me of the Obama/Clinton Democratic Debates in a way! The freedom to do that is astonishing. Believe me, I've been on other boards that didn't have that options. Posts may have been deleted if disagreement took place.

OMHO, but the atmosphere is like a think-tank, and more power to it. If I wanted someone to agree with me, I would have asked elsewhere. That elsewhere probably would have received 2-4 replies too. The frequency of posting here is remarkable, the help invaluable.

So someone comes along (and I'm not saying this was the case) and is strongwilled or beligerant -- that's life! To me GardenWeb is as close to perfection as I could hope to find.

I truly am blessed to have found it, strong-willed people at times or not!

There are a lot of wonderful people on here who give amazing advice. Then there are others on here who don't give advice. They just spew hatred upon stepmoms. They attack their posts as the same 2 attacked my recent post.

I come on here looking for advice and encouragement and from the same few I get told that I am not capable of relaying a situation to my dh or brother-in-law because I am just a stepmom. I get told that I have no say in the child I raise as my own. When I say raise I am not speaking of EOW. I am speaking of DAILY while her bm dates and parties and can not be bothered to call or visit.

You would think that stepmoms like myself would get commended for providing that nurturing mother relationship with the child. Instead I get bashed for it and told that I am not allowed to do anything for my stepdaughter. Other times when it suits the trolls I get told that I should be doing this or that.

I definitely enjoy the "think-tank" atmosphere here and the way most people respectfully debate their opinions and experiences.

The only thing I would wish is if people posted to topics where they can actually have something purposeful to say. If the topic is whether or not to talk to SC about picking up their clothes and someone comes on and says something like 'Why was the dog named Sparky?' What is the purpose in that??? Obviously the origins of Sparky's name has nothing to do with the kids picking up their clothes. That's the kind of stuff I get bogged down with. Then everyone starts debating on why Sparky was named that instead of Spencer and he should've been named Spot because he has fifty brown spots and blah, blah, blah. Before you know it, it takes 5 minutes to open a thread because everyone has had a debate about Sparky or Spencer or Spot and very few pieces of relevent advice for the poor OP who just wanted her SC to pick up their dirty clothes and put them in the hamper. Of course this is hypothetical, but have we not all seen this happen recently?

Ya know what I mean?