We got married on April 18, 1983. I thought there might be tulips blooming about then. That year Spring was late. There weren't any tulips blooming or even daffodils and snow flurries were predicted. I'm not sure if it did actually snow. We had the wedding inside. I remember another year when it was downright hot in April. Come to think of it it was hot in April 2004. April is pretty unpredictable around here. I'd try for May if I were you. I think the grass and lots of other things are that beautiful Spring green then.

I promised in this post to post my vows. Again, we didn't exactly do vows. My brother-in-law started the "ceremony" be announcing that we would basically recite our thoughts and feelings. He did a wonderful job. I don't have a copy of dh's words, but you'll get the idea from mine below. We had this party as a backyard picnic sort of thing, did the "ceremony" on our deck with microphones. It turned out beautifully. Really enjoyed it. Here is what I said (names changed to protect our privacy) My dearest John, 25 years ago, we stood at the alter together and pledged our commitment to each other. I remember standing there hoping we would be right for each other and that everything would work out for us. Little did I realize what a gem of a man I was marrying. We have had a wonderful twenty-five years together. This ceremony would not be complete without the mention of our wonderful children. We were both elated at the birth of each of our children. And have continued to be very proud parents as they have each grown into wonderful human beings. And each has their special traits and personality. Dana is a beautiful young woman who has really blossomed with her education and Chinese language and cultural experience. And John has turned into a wonderful young man with the determination to learn to fly at 17. But John, you have been a wonderful man, husband and father. No woman could ask for anything more. YouÂve put up with me for all these years and I know that has not been easy. I know that I can be demanding and difficult at times, but I have always loved you. When we got married, we had nothing, except our love for each other. WeÂve both worked long and hard for everything we have today. We were only in our early 20Âs when we married and we sort of grew up together. But the most important thing we have that we have built is this marriage. WeÂve had our good times and our bad. As I write this I try to think of our good times together, but I canÂt think of any in particular, because our entire marriage has been our good times. Our next 25 years together promises to hold some unusual challenges for us both. But at this point IÂm certain we will make it through those challenges. Thankyou John, for all that youÂve meant to me. I love you John Robert Smith and I always will.

My small family wedding is going to be just that - small and immediate family only, in my future in-laws back yard. Mine will be smaller than yours though - 12 people, tops, including the officient. ;-) Mine is casual, wedding at 11am, lunch after for the attendees, and that's it, no reception or anything either - very laid back and relaxed. Personally, I think I'd get the wedding over with first, and then do a late dinner and cake. Then there wouldn't be a "break" in the festivities, and you won't have to "switch gears" from dinner to getting married. Were you going to have a dance afterwards anyways? If not, then don't worry about it, just leave it out. If so, then by all means, have your first dance. I would definately forgo the tosses and such...you don't need replacements, just leave them out. You're going to be very pregnant - I really think I'd make things as simple as possible for yourself, and just leave out the things that don't seem to have a place. Going with your original plan, just have your dinner, get married, then have cake, and dismiss everyone - you are going to be *exhausted* by then anyways even just with that few things, and you need to take care of yourself. :-) One thing you *should* do though is send announcements out afterwards to all who weren't invited...that's what I'm going to do to "smooth over" some ruffled feathers (people who aren't invited) and inform people of new names, addresses, phone numbers, etc... Good luck - I'm sure it will all turn out just lovely. :-)

I have a different version of the Sand Ceremony. We are also having an outside ceremony and opted for to use the Sand Ceremony. Our version incorporates Christ (if your niece is religious). Here's it is: Sand Ceremony Minister: "Bride and Groom, you have just sealed your relationship by giving and receiving of rings and this covenant is a relationship pledge between two people who agree that they will commit themselves to one another throughout their lives. You are committing here today to share the rest of your lives with one another. Today, this relationship is symbolized through the pouring of these three individual containers of sand into a fourth one. One, representing you, Bride, and all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be. One, representing you, Groom, and all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be. The third one represents Christ, all that He is and all will forever be. As these three containers of sand are poured into the fourth container, the individual containers of sand continue to exist, but a fourth entity is also created; on which did not exist before but one which will forever more continue to be. Just as the individual grains of sand can never again be separated and poured again into the individual containers, so your marriage will be. (Minister pours the Christ layer) This layer represents Christ who is and always will be the foundation of you both as individuals. Bride, pour some of your sand which will represent you as an individual. Groom, pour some of your sand which will represent you as an individual. (Minister pours more of the Christ layer) This layer represents Christ as the foundation of your marriage. Bride and Groom, now pour your remaining sand into the container together to represent the joining of your two individual lives into this union of marriage."