Houzz Logo Print

Question for all of you with exes/shared cust. RE: school events

14 years ago

How do you typically handle who takes the kid(s) to school activies/events?

This Sat. SS has a little fair/indoor carnival at his school. It's not a big deal---just some game booths, food, bounce house, etc. A PTA fundraiser.

We have SS Wed-Mon this week and he will (obviously) be with us this Sat. for the fair. However, DH works on Saturdays, although usually just from 9-early afternoon. He could totally take off earlier than normal and we could take both kids to the fair.

BUT of course--BM told him she wants to go. DH just kind of said that he had figured we would take him and BM said well, she wants to be there, too, the RO says she CAN be around me at school functions (she is right.)

SIGH. DH told her (not sure verbatim) that he doesn't want to stand around and play big old happy family, that it just makes it too awkward for ALL of us to go, and that he doesn't really want to be there with her even if I stayed home.

And, really, he's right---it is just stupid! I mean, it's one thing at a soccer game where we are watching SS play. But a fair? I mean, what, are we ALL (me, DH, BM) going to walk him from booth to booth and watch him do this game, watch him get face-painting, watch him in the bounce house? It seems like an unnecessarily awakward situation for ALL.

Anyway, so DH just said fine, never mind, he would rather work a longer day, and that BM can just take SS. He made plans to drop SS off with her in the AM and said he would pick him up on his way home from work in the mid-afternoon.

So SS will be with BM on Sat.

It's really not a big deal *this time*, DH and I are both FINE to skip the event; but I also don't like setting this precendent that he will give in/back off because she's insisting on being there.

So, like I said, how do YOU handle school events? Who takes the child? The parent they're with, or both parents?

Nothing is going to change here, as this has already all been decided and it works fine THIS TIME...but what about next?

Comments (23)