With my siblings and Mum, we are very sporadic about gifts. Most years we skip the gift part of Xmas, and birthday gifts are experiences (restaurant meal, a performance) or let me give you the money to pay for (whatever) that you just bought yourself. With my husband, we both buy what we need or want when we need it so we don't give each other gifts. With my in-laws, I have to provide a written list of what I might want. They rarely purchase from the list so I don't know why it's required. Since I refuse to play the game anymore, my husband provides a list of ideas for gift cards (restaurants, gas cards) for both of us. My husband dislikes the gift exchanging, although he's actually quite good at it, but he doesn't fight it because it's important to his mother and sister. Xmas is now basically an exchange of gift cards, occasionally for the exact same thing. My longest term BFF doesn't like to exchange gifts so we don't - perfect! We usually treat the other to dinner. My 2nd longest BFF is a gift giver; I give her kids money and something I think she and her husband would want. I don't routinely exchange gifts with anyone else. Once in awhile I'll get or give a gift to another friend. The best gift I ever received was when my husband was sick and a friend would drop off wonderful salads for me. I would come home from being at the hospital all day and she'd stop by with it, all freshly made with interesting ingredients. It was nourishing to my body and soul.

As a Master Gardener, may I suggest that you don't buy seeds or plants? They may have a plan that they are going to follow, and if you send them particular plants or seeds, they may feel obligated to use them even though they may not be the "right plant in the right place." Instead, how about a gift certificate to a nearby nursery? A family member once brought me a set of Burt's Bees products for gardeners. There are tons of gardening gadgets out there, if they like to garden. (Just because they're getting new landscaping doesn't mean they are avid gardeners though.) One item that I just saw on TV that I thought I'd like to have is that new clothing that has insect repellent imbedded into the fibers (link below). Or how about something for their home that is handmade in your area (meaning they can't get one locally), like a vase or a handwoven throw for those chilly nights? Email me if you want the name of someone who makes beautiful hand-turned wooden vases. If they entertain often, you could get them a set of nice wine glasses or other wine items, martini glasses, serving dishes, a big platter. It's always good to have plenty! I also like to receive placemats and napkins, but that could just be an obsession of mine. :-) Here is a link that might be useful: BUZZ OFF Insect Shield apparel

Hi Krustytopp, I've been dealing with an invasion of little critters recently, that may be mice - but on the other hand, they don't look quite like garden-variety mice ... more like junior sized rats. Anyway ... ... the tracking that they leave behind to let you know of their presence is quite similar, whichever they are and is here ... in quantity. I'm busy gathering those little black, elongated pellets up, to add to the compost pile. I could perhaps send some to you (possibly labelled as "by-products - of little commercial value" to satisfy the concerns of the postal folks) to take with you when you visit the store that dribbled away the value of your "gift " card/certificate on you. Maybe they'd like some of it scattered along their "service" counter ... ... or you could suggest to them that you could drop some of it among their merchandise, e.g. sweaters, socks, underwear, etc. - to about equal value of the stuff that they denied you. Or, if they have a snack bar, on the tables in there? How about on their check-out counter? I'll bet the check-out staff person would be impressed with that! How long do you think that it'd take for them to get cleaning staff to show up? Do you think that the check-out staff person would still be in attendance at her/his counter by the time of the cleaner's arrival?? Seems like a fitting reminder of your visit, don't you think? Have yourself a lovely week. ole joyful P.S. Hey - I just thought of a better idea. Ask to see the manager. Drop some in his pocket. Tell him that you think that a fitting response to his company's having stolen value out of yours! I think that'd be a fitting conclusion to your visit to his store! Don't you?? On the other hand ... ... if you took the stuff in a Zip-loc bag, showed it and suggested to the various staff people along the route that I mentioned that you were thinking of doing what I suggested, that what did they think about that idea? Ending with your discussion with the manager. I'll bet that they'd remember your visit for a while! On your next visit to the store, you could ask to speak to the manager again ... ... and remind him of your displeasure at your treatment by his store. Mention that you still had that little bag at home ... That you hadn't bought anything at their store today ... ... and wouldn't be doing so for a while. And that you'd been telling several friends of your unhappiness - for months, now. That they'd all had a good laugh at your story - and thought you amply justified in what you'd done. Just thought that he'd like to know. Give him the bag. Just mention in passing that you have another like it at home. No - you didn't threaten them/him with anything. You were just considering certain possible future actions. o j

We've had excellent seafood at The Ritz Carlton, I can't remember the name of the seafood restaurant. The Ritz on the beach, there are 2 in Naples.) The Turtle Club at the Vanderbilt Beach Resort Is also very good. If they will be in Naples during 'the season' it's important they make reservations as soon as they know the dates they'll be in the area. (You may want to check availability of seating reservations before purchasing a gift certificate.)