Well Rick, he THINKS he's a chachaua (sp?)....He really is a good boy...he can just fly...he'd never hurt anyone but it does scare the you know what outa them cuz he is so big... bobbi, yes it's almost been 2 years since Tony has been off of all meds, we did catch it early, because he was actually paying attention to his body and the warning signs were there...Thank God he told me...he has always been the one to ignore this disease and never wants to talk about it...so I was shocked when HE called me and asked that I schedule him an appt...whew... I use to have the electric fence because my female boxer, believe it or not would squeeze her big ole' body out them tiny rails...Boy did you bring back memories..LOL....I do remember taking metal buckets out to pick berries and being so careful about getting our body under the hot wire..only to touch it with the metal bucket...lol!!! It really won't work in his case because he absolutely clears the fence .. never even gets close to it....Amazes me that he is so big and can jump so high....I don't have a dog I have a horse...LOL I was thinking even if we do resort to the lattice, I can actually still plant some vines to grow up them...hmmmmm...And yes...if jim wanted a vacation, I know where he could come, I would have the lumber waiting!!..Oh and his wife is welcome too!!!...LOL I don't think you offended anyway, I know I wasn't and have used the electric wire on several occasions, and to keep the dogs outa my flower beds too, they do learn, and it really does not hurt them! Thank you so much for asking about Tony, he was diagnosed in 2003, and it was hard to watch your son living only because of a machine...it was a long hard road, but with ALOT of prayer he lived and is really a very normal young man...I know that you have been thru alot also in your life and totally understand where I am coming from. In my daughters case, is there any other agencies out there that help a single mother (besides welfare) she doesnt want to quit working, and her first child, Colby, his father actually killed himself about a year ago...he never worked enough for Colby to qualify for any social security, so sad..so we have always provided for Colby. She has applied for daycare assistance, yet there is a waiting list....she also has wick to help to purchase the baby's formula...I just wish there was some type of aide to help a single mother, when the other parent is deceased..... One more question...Im so sorry this is soo off topic, but I know the people here know so much! IF the father of Maddi (the baby) were to go to jail or prison, does the state cover his child support? or does she not get any help with her either? So far they have been seperated for 3 months, and he has given her a total of $400. and daycare for her alone is $550. a month..Soo many questions...lol..Im sorry, but any other advice would be so appreciated! Dena

Essie that is the way I felt when I visited Africa, I tipped big. A child dressed in his traditional African costume expected a dollar tip for a photo, I gave him $2. until I found out how expensive things were there and what workers got paid. Then I tipped more. He probably made a big part of his family's food money. In this country the habit is becoming tip every one who serves, trash man, masseuse, cable man, postman, the list goes on and on. Anyone should be lucky enough to earn what a post man makes plus his benefits and I don't tip those people because they are being paid wages. Some of the places I eat know me as a regular customer and a couple put on what they know I like when I walk in the door, 3 places have done that. One place will say this is on the house this time. These employees get paid for their work just as if they worked in a book store or clerked in a dept store. Sure they are not living wages, but from my experience they are in temp jobs while they are out of school. I tip in restaurants how much depends on the service I get, especially when I am served with a smile. I do not usually tip in buffets, especially if they all they do is bring me water and ask if I want to order off the menu or have the buffet. This post was edited by EmmaR on Mon, Dec 9, 13 at 15:14

Interesting take on change and ruts. As much as I see I may be in a rut, I don't consider myself adverse to change in the least. I thrive with change.. I made my living selling and implementing change. But I don't necessarily see the majority of things we're discussing here as "game changing" changes.. "life changing" changes. I suppose a makeover could be life changing.. but for most of us, I doubt that's the case. Pal, I think you've made an excellent point. Having routine and some things simplified in one aspect of our lives can give us the freedom to seek change in others. I worked and lived with some brilliant researchers and they all had odd quirks in their routines. I too know people who literally eat the same things every day (not quite the extreme of the same thing every meal lol). I think of this as variety though-- not change. I guess that is my big aha of the day.. variety does not equal change. Personally, I like variety but I need change. I am on the cusp of a change-- I am looking for a new job, i am preparing for the eventual move of my bf cross country. My life is going to change a great deal.. and I am impatient. I am sitting here ready for the changes to come.. but I am impatient. The one great mystery is that while we can welcome and even direct change, we cannot control it. Sure, I can change my hair, my nail color.. .I can try new recipes or cooking techniques. I can change my toilet paper and my workout routine.. but that's not going to make the job offers come rolling in. They might give me the illusion of change as I sit here waiting for it though. Or not :) I have been through this before. The antsy feeling of anticipation and impatience. I remember when I first saw the movie Chocolat-- silly as it is, I remember having a great sense of understanding when a wind came up and Vianne Rocher (Juliette Binoche's character) knew it was time to move on.. I liken it to the way my dogs used to respond to the big gusts in the fall that proceeded snow. They'd lift their noses and then perform antsy dances. Who knows what they were responding to.. could have been carried in with the winds scents.. or low pressure.. but it was a marked response to something in the air. I feel change is in the air and I am forced to sit here and wait for it. So yeah, I'll get my hair done.. select the new paint color for the lr... organize the pantry.. all so that I am ready when the new opportunity arrives. Kind of like the nesting behavior we see in expectant mothers. (and please -- no apologies for branching a thread. That's what conversations do! It's all good!)

Outside Playing, thanks for the book recommendation. I'll try it after I finish the one I'm currently reading, which sounds like it has a similar plot line but in a different context: The Sisterhood, by Liza Mundy, It tells the story of how extremely capable and driven women had to work hard to break up the CIA's old boy network culture to open employment opportunities to the other half of the population. Women who, in many roles, could offer superior aptitude and insights for situations and tasks than men could offer but for which they were long denied the opportunities to try. rob, you're welcome to ignore anything I say. I provided factual information .You can choose to ignore it. There's no need to repeat what's already been provided.