Bright Child Leaves College
18 years ago
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- 18 years ago
- 18 years ago
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'Tree' rose, Julia Child, yellowing leaves, help?
Comments (1)Make sure you have excellent drainage from the container. If the drain holes are getting plugged, the soil will stay too wet and eventually rot the roots. We had the same thing happen to a tree rose in a container. When I freed up the drain holes it was like a river coming out the bottom....See MoreSon leaving for college
Comments (8)I just kept telling myself that this departure to college and growing independence was what I had worked for all these many years. This is being successful. This is working. This is what we all need. This is success..... It is hard, no doubt about it. But it is also exciting. So now start planning for an easy transition. Be sure he knows how to do laundry. At my university, all the freshman boys wore pink underwear. I would sit in the laundromat waiting for my laundry to finish, and every fall watch awe struck freshmen pull their pink underwear out of the washing machine along with the college red sweatshirt. All the school sweatshirts were red, and thus the pink underwear! Also, find some twin extra long sheets for him, and create a kit of laundry stuff and first aid stuff, including what he should take if he catches a bad cold or has an allergic reaction to the gunk in the air up there. Call the university and ask whose ATM is located ON their campus. Then open a joint banking account for him there early enough to receive his blank checks and ATM card before he leaves. He will be walking to campus and to classes in rain (and snow???) So be sure he has some kind of weather clothing in the way of shoes and an umbrella or rain coat. Assuming he will be living in a dorm and it is allowed, buy him one of those little refrigerators (unless his roommate is already bringing one). Send him up with a set of silverware and a plate and bowl and mug for feeding himself in his room. A cheap, tiny microwave might be good too. The dorm rooms seem to have only a bed or kitchen type chair you can sit on to study. Buy him one of those bed pillows that looks like the back of an easy chair with arms to help him snuggle in for study sessions. You can find them at Target, Sears, BB&B, etc. The day he leaves or the day before, mail him a care package of his favorite cookies and snacks so that it will arrive the day after you deposit him there. I always called my daughter on Sunday evenings. I heard about the weekend fun and about the school week ahead. I offered lots of dating and socializing input then, and hopefully it helped her adjust and stay on an even keel....See Morecollege workloads and assumptions of others
Comments (11)Thank you all so much. It's nice to have input from people who know first hand what engineering classes are like. As I read your generous responses, I realized I left you all a bit unsure who was concerned here, him or I. His dad and I have practically taken him by the ear, and put him in a car with his buddies, so he will get a break and have some laughs, and he is always glad he did. For some reason, this post made me see what I already knew, but was careful not to admit to you and even to myself. He has a girlfriend who is 3 years older, with a 10 yr old daughter. For alot of understandable reasons, she is more than anxious to loose the title single mom and get married. He wants to wait till he graduates to marry, and this makes her resent how much school he has left, She is really laying on the pressure. If she want to go out She complains in front of his friends and her family, about how much he studies, and I have been there when she has stated that she is the only one who works, leaving out the fact he is in college full time, as if it isn't an appropriate detail for such a remark. She believes that because she was able to get thru dental assistant school and still party, that engineering school should be the same, she knows it's not true, but when she wants to do something one evening and he has a test the next day, she resorts back to these kind of judgements, saying it not only to him, but she says it to his friends and her family, and even my husband and I. It's tough as a parent to watch, because It tears him down and belittles the hard work he puts forth with consistancy and with out whining. I see it in his face, and we have talked about it, they have broke up over it but they always get back together. I guess I didn't want to admit it was not just people in general, but her, because there is basically nothing I can do to make this right for him. That is about them and thier issues, and I have no place in the middle of it. I don't want to meddle in his life, tho I sometimes do accidentally. As far as working, he has worked thru the summers. And he's mentioned working during school. We have told him, it's his choice, but if it's strictly money driving that idea, to know we can give him what he needs. I hate to tell this, but we lost a family business we had for 32 years, last year, and it was messy. It was and still is a a very tough time, and there was no way to hide that from our kids. What it has done to him is make him feel guilty for the expense of college. We have a college fund, that is much smaller than it was, but its still enough. But he knows that the bank was able to 75 percent of our retirement, but we still will not starve. We have tried to convince him of this, but when he sees us watch our funds in little ways we never ever did before, he feels like hes partly the cause. Wow, people; this is getting more complicated and pathetic by the minute. And as I try to make it sound better or lighter I seem to do the opposite, so I am just going to stop and thank you all for your help. I am going to realize that this problem is with his girlfriend and is something only he can handle. And your inquiring minds are what made me realize that so thanks to you all. laurily...See Morecollege
Comments (71)I was only making a point (meant with a touch of sarcasm) that in another thread you stated that I have never been divorced so I know nothing about divorced people. I think I know enough to have an opinion on how (divorced) people act by my experiences/education in dealing with divorced people, even though I'm not divorced. We can all have opinions on any subject, and we do. But when I express my opinion about marriage and get told that I have no business discussing marriage because I haven't been married for 20+ years, or I am told that because I was never married to my children's fathers, I must have low expectations regarding their responsibility, or when I talk of divorced people, I must not know what I'm talking about because I am not divorced. Nobody here should have to defend their "credentials" to have an opinion. And that was my point. You are not a step parent but you have a right to your opinions regarding it. If you become a step parent, those opinions may change, just as kkny or tos may change their mind set if they ever get married and see what it's like to wear the hat of a step mother. I appreciate and see value to everyone's opinions (I don't always agree and may say so) but my right to have an opinion seems to be attacked by having my past thrown into my face and it feels like I'm expected to hang my head in shame and not have an opinion....See More- 18 years ago
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