I have a nephew in SC -- I should go visit and get some rocks :) Actually, these rocks were all over my yard for some reason. I decided to put them all together in a rock garden. I am going to go hunting for rocks because I need to expand the rock garden by about 20+ more feet in length. oh, yeh, I did go hunting for the river rock. Numerous excursions to the beach. (SHHHH) I'm not too comfortable with the idea that GW could possibly make some money off my photos. :/ yuck.

Nancy, I tore my meniscus some 7 years ago and it was a while before I got to see the knee specialist. I believed I was mismanaged by my regular doctor then or rather his staff at the time. While they did immediately sent my file to the knee surgeon, either they didn't do much follow up or the doctor didn't emphasize enough the state of my knee. It took a rehab doctor to tell me I needed an operation and so with that information I went right back to my doctor and demanded they follow up with the knee surgeon. At that point they gave me the phone no to that clinic and when I made the phone and explained my state, I was seen immediately and they wanted to operate the following weekend. Talk about mismanagement and the further damages it caused my knee. 50 percent of my meniscus is gone. I cannot do any sports anymore as a result.

PART 2 he has spread lies about me all over town, has people look out for me and call him when they see me like I'm some kind of criminal. I've never been arrested or in trouble with the law. never was dishonest with them. matter of fact my honesty has been anmd still is used agaiunst me. his son is a dope head, has been arrested,for domestic violence, grand theft auto, breaking and entering, drugs, u name it. I still deal with the abuse because I need my adopted mom for a place to stay. I feel like a pile of dung for having to depend on her. its impossible to be independent when your making 10.50 hr. With a growing boy in school and fiance is hashing out problems with SSI as he is unable to work. and because she is brainwashed into thinking she needs him, he has control and messes with me however he can, yet i cant think of a way to kleep him away from me and quit messing with me. He set the pool pump to go on for 5 hours everyday and locked it and did the same with the sprinklers so we cant change it. I pay the water and electric bill. He's got the whole world it seems like convinced I'm on drugs. that infuriates me because no one sees that he's being dishonest and unreasonable. they all know his son is a skrew up and a drug addict and that he's been in all sorts of trouble. and I'm not yet they believe him. I wanna know where did his credibility come from? y are his friend and he's so stupid to believe him and not question his mean nasty things he says in such a mean nasty way about a child (when I was) and when he still talks so bad about me now, and to mainly the same people, now that I'm an adult and doing my own thing y don't they ever question him? I mean come on, it's got to get old at some point, this crazy white hair man running around can't keep my name out his mouth. y he is so hell bent on proving to the world that im a skrew up??

Say this to your DH. "DH at 8:00pm on the 3rd, I'd like to have a discussion about the kids". This will show him it's important to you and thought out. It'll also eat at him a little bit as wondering what your conversation will hold. Best to have conversations without emotions being involved. Don't ignore him up until then, act loving & then on the 3rd state your case like a professional. Explain to him spanking isn't a form of punishment you agree with. Write down alternatives to spanking 1) taking a toy away, 2) timeouts, 3) not going to do a fun activity. 4) Counting has done wonders for my son. Ask him if he has other forms of discipline that you both would consider. Tell him if the spanking needs to continue in his opinion, it's obviously not working & he will need to attend a parenting class to give him other avenues of punishment. Look one up(parenting class) & have the dates/time written down prior to the 3rd. I write everything down prior to a meeting like this so I don't & he won't go off track. Keep it strictly focused on the spanking topic only. Don't go off topic. Now as you say you "baby" your daughter, do you parent out of guilt? That's not the best way to parent, but I have done it many times myself. Address(to yourself) why you feel bad for her. What do you feel guilty about? Remember you are preparing this little girl for the world. You want her to have personal boundaries & respect for herself. If she has no boundaries from you, she won't have them for herself. I know you love her because you're here asking for information about making her life better. I remember a few motherly sayings, "A Mother is not a person to Lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary." Try & remember you can shape her for only a little while & then the world gets her. You're a good mom & she sounds like a lucky little girl. Just a few things to work on, just like the rest of us. Also, I think you're very gracious in allowing your daughter to love her Dad "very much". I've seen many times where a child doesn't feel comfortable loving the other parent. You're a very good Mom to encourage the love between your daughter and her Dad. She may be more defiant when coming home from Dads. The rules are probably not difficult to follow there & he sees her briefly so discipline isn't needed. Give her time to adjust after getting home & let her debrief. Also, your DH may love your son more. If roles were reversed you would probably love your biological child more than a stepchild. That doesn't mean he should show it though. Rules are to be equal. Good luck & hang in there! Parenting is tough & even tougher with blended families.