I guess I didn't check to be notified of posts. I didn't know there were any responses until solstice98 on another forum gave me the link. Thanks SO MUCH for all the comments and especially bihai's detailed response to Gainesville (thank you!) since at least we have spent a few days there looking around. It's definitely easier on me to take the heat than the cold. It took me too many years in VA to admit it but all the structural damage seems to occur in winter, so it's best to make the move. We moved here to VA after 18 years in AL (15 of which I had the rheumatoid issue with no damage). I wanted to get away from the heat and humidity of central AL. Oh well .... I enjoy change and I've lived in a variety of states, but always wanting the woods since I can't be in the sun. Sure does make it difficult with conflicting health issues [grin]. Solstice98: Does Lakeland have a lot of forests? When I look on the map, I see lakes and those are generally sunny areas, other than maybe some riparian buffer around the lakes. We're not water folks. Haven't done the beach since the mid-70's since I can't be in the sun. That kinda tosses the coast ideas out doesn't it? Or is the "nature coast" I see pop up on searches a different story? I love the sounds of tropical fruit trees! Would the Ocala area fit more? Or Dunnellon? As far as the "catching the breeze" areas mentioned because Gainesville was so far north. We like the theater and places to volunteer (nature centers, botanical gardens gift shop, etc.) University towns are great for this, although the medical emphasis of Gainesville isn't an attraction. We've used "alternative" choices since the late 70's so have been out of that industry for quite some time, other than bloodwork now and then for thyroid. To answer juniperplants, I had family in Hollywood when I was a teenager and young girl and I remember it as being really sunny. I love the outdoors and like to spend a lot of time walking in forests, so that's where I got the idea it wouldn't be an option. I'm also not a city gal, so I like walking out of my backdoor into the woods - not having to drive to them. With rheumatoid stuff going on, the woods out back are what entice me outdoors for the exercise I need ... but the thought of driving a car would not get me there - mornings are a bit overwhelming at times. We even order our food (other than produce) every 5 months so I don't have to do grocery shopping. I was talking about temperate trees. Neither my husband or I like palms, although mixed into the rainforests of Costa Rica they are lovely. And as far as humidity in Costa Rica ... it depends on the area you're in. It can be in the 70's year round with a cool breeze other than mid-day and early afternoon. International living might appeal to me if we didn't have an FIV kitty that would never be allowed in. And it does seem "odd" not to live in the USA. :-) I love most plants, so I don't mind growing flowers I don't know. It's not that I'm looking for a place to have all my "old friends" and I did see some of them during our visit to Gainesville ... and also some things we had in AL, so that won't be a problem. I did like the mix of trees in the forests there with some saw palmettos on the ground. The list of things grown in Gainesville is a nice blend. Sounds like May through Sept. are the hottest times?? We were down there in June with unusual cool weather in the mornings till about 10:30 and then it cooled off after the rains at 5. That was lovely, but I understand not typical. The student population is something that came up all the time while we were there. Fortunately we work in-house with our own online business, so the traffic problem would not be a day-to-day issue, but it sounds like you don't want to be anywhere near the university or mall area, eh? We also were informed of the high taxes since Alachua Cty is so much Univ. and Hospital that don't pay them. Do you live in Alachua County, Bihai? Familiar with HOA - ended up in a community here because we were going to find land and build, so it would be temporary and fast resale. Oh well ... you know how life takes it's turns. One thing we know is that we don't want HOA again. Gardening choices hasn't been a problem, but brush piles and a few other issues have been. Live and learn :-) The list of wildlife possibilities is very cool. We so enjoy the entertainment that it provides outside our windows and that's where I work, by a window, unless it's nice enough to be outside like now, I'm on the porch. The pools have been an issue when looking online for a home. We don't want one because neither of us enjoy pools anyway. Haven't been in one since a hotel back in the early 80's. Sure is a lot to think about and digest. I want to come back down there end of September to look around more but I know FL is a huge state, so will need to choose a few cities and make a decision. Thanks again ...

Good morning all, quick check in here, then I've got to get moving. Little GD is coming over today to play with Gma, and then we are going over there for dinner tomorrow evening for Mother's Day. Our weather warmed up again this week, but is only hot for a few hours. Mornings and evenings are still cool, so we haven't even had to use the air conditioner yet in spite of the 90 degree temps. Bebe, I remember you saying that you like dishes too. You really have allot to work with, but are you like me and don't bother since it is mostly just the two of you? My DH prefers to eat in front of the tv, so I mostly decorate the table when we have company coming. Once in awhile, I'll set the dining room table just to "play" then leave it a couple days just to enjoy how pretty it looks! ;o) If I had the storage, I'd love to have all kinds of dishes and accessories because I think they are so pretty--but we downsized a few years back to get ready for retirement so not much extra space now. I sure enjoy seeing what the gals on Holidays put together, and love checking out Tablescape Thursdays on the blogs. ;o) I also keep trying to find things to paint that can be used in tablescapes too. Guess I really need to try painting on glass to be able to do more of that. Have hesitated to do it because I need to buy special paints for that. More money and more storage issues! ;o) Punk, hope you get lots done at your son's house. Have they moved in to it already? Nice that you are close enough to be able to go help. Sure sounds like you will be eating well this weekend with those two events going on. Hope you have lots of fun too. Anj, you are right, a crockpot is a really good idea. I only have two, one small and one large oval one and love using them. Used to be so nice when I would come home from work and dinner was already cooked and the house smelled so good. I like to watch that Semi Homemade show on tv and she has done several shows with crockpot meals. I think those countertop grills make good gifts too and most everyone likes them too. I always hate trying to think of gifts for people, always want it to be something they will like and use, but never sure what they like. LOL Okay, gotta run. Have a good weekend. Luvs

"What in heaven's name would prompt a 7 yr old to even think of saying that?" He has his mom's support. His mom is immature and making it a game for him. He thinks it's fun & probably has no idea what it really means... but he's getting a reaction, isn't he? His mom is reacting with laughing along with him.. dad is reacting by telling him "that's not funny", but to him.. it is funny. He is controlling mom & dad with what he's saying. He has 'power'. I'd suggest dad practice saying "that's nice" or "okay" and change the subject. Unless dad really thinks he's drinking alcohol (which he may... a mom like that would think nothing of giving a kid a sip) but the more power he gives it, the more they will do it (trying to goad/engage dad with their funny little game) Playing those games, makes them feel like a team.. them against dad. In the end, it will be destructive for mom because she is going to lose her son's respect. Mom is on his level, not the parental level where child has respect for parent. Dad needs to stay on the parent level and not play the game with those two. As for his self esteem, when you try to convince someone who thinks they are ugly or stupid or whatever that they are not, all it does is makes them think you're just saying that. I wouldn't give it any attention at all. When he says "I'm so stupid", instead of telling him he's not, ask him to help do something you know he can do... like say, "well, I don't know about that... you think you can help me find my keys?" or something along that line. If you're going somewhere, get him to help find landmarks or street signs and when you get to the destination, thank him for all his help i finding the place/keys, etc. It might help him to see that adults don't always have all the answers and know everything and him helping you will make him feel smart/brave/etc. when he accomplishes it. As for holding him back, you have no control over what DH and BM do. It seems the more DH says he needs to be held back, the more adamant BM is in saying no way. The teacher should be the one telling BM because she is the one that is there day in & day out with SS and she's a third party. If I were your DH, I would stop pressing to hold him back and maybe suggest that he might benefit from a learning center (like sylvan) and tell her how much her half is going to be. I'd probably say something like "I've been thinking and maybe you're right, our son shouldn't have to be held back and be embarrassed as the oldest kid in the class next year... however, I know you are as concerned as I am about him keeping up and succeeding in school so I guess the best thing to do for our son is to share the cost of a learning center. It's going to be $XXXX.XX. What do you think?" and see what she has to say... I think her egging her son on to say the alcohol thing is a dig at DH for making her do the evaluation. As hard as it is... I'd try to ignore it. Document it, but ignore it. It WILL come back to bite her in the ass... eventually. Karma!

I guess background information would be helpful :)! This is a new build and is almost framed so walls and window must stay. We have 5 people in our household - 2 adults and 3 boys ages 10, 8 and 6. With boys, lots of food is a priority and I buy 4 or 5 gallons of milk at a time, hence the need for lots of fridge space. We will have a separate freezer in the laundry room (down the hall past the fridge) so we don't need lots of freezer space - just a spot for frozen berries for smoothies, waffles and a half gallon of ice cream or so. The rest (meats, pizzas, leftovers, etc.) will be stored in the upright freezer in the laundry room. I would prefer not to have an icemaker - seems wasteful to me to make so much ice and not need nearly that much. We do need ice in the kitchen though and because we are doing a built in fridge one option is a 36" all fridge, which necessitates an icemaker of some sort and fridge or freezer drawers (these are VERY expensive to get all freezer and the room in the fridge freezer will probably be fine). I am concerned about the ergonomics of spreading all these appliances around and also would prefer having fewer rather than more, but sort of shy away from the huge mass of a 48" fridge. Very open to options in this area though! I am the main cook and almost always the only cook. However, my husband does cook his own breakfast (always uses microwave for either turkey bacon or oatmeal or both), and often we overlap. Other than breakfast, I am the cook and the clean up person. As far as the two dishwashers go, my boys (and husband) seem to eat constantly and on a particularly heavy day I end up running the dishwasher both before and after dinner. Two dishwashers would be used for entertaining but also because it would be nice to be able to run one during the day and still have a place to put the dishes. I am a creature of habit so I run it at night and unload in the morning and to have to break from that routine to have a place to put the dinner dishes throws me off! As far as entertaining, almost exclusively informal and almost never catered (i.e., with a catering staff). The exception is holidays, where we are the usual gathering spot. I don't have a need for a baking center (almost never bake - although I enjoy it), nor do we need a coffee center (we will just put the coffee pot on the countertop). We have a wet bar (with pocket doors) in the den so we will put all water, sodas, beer, etc. there but a snack center if we do the refrigerator drawers would be helpful. Oh and one more thing! Realized recently that there is no view of the TV from the breakfast room. This is not a real issue because we don't watch tv during dinner and I will have a small countertop tv in the kitchen viewable from the island so I can watch tv while I clean or cook. I am a little concerned about the times where tv is watched during a meal (the Masters, college football, etc.) and thought about putting a small 19" flat screen on the edge of the island by the breakfast area, hopefully with a cabinet door or tambour door or something so it can be closed away. Not necessary I guess and won't be used tons but it might be helpful to keep food out of the den! Hope this helps! and P.S. There will be no barrelling through the dining room :) I have cured them of that habit in this house so I am not worried about the oven opening into a path (the fridge would worry me more as that is something they are in and out of all day long).