Missy got this in an email from a friend the other day and asked me if she should dump her friend. When I was reading it and trying not to laugh she gave me dirty looks and had to leave the room. I heard her laughing outside the door so knew I was not going to get hurt. She still weighs 115 like she did in high school. Runs rings around me. "HIGH SCHOOL CLASS REUNION OF A 70 YEAR OLD WOMAN I went on a starvation diet the day before, Knowing that all the extra weight would just melt off in 24 hours, Leaving me with my sleek, trim, high-school-girl body. The last forty years of cellulite collection Would just be gone with a snap of a finger. I knew if I didn't eat a morsel on Friday, That I could fit into my senior formal on Saturday. Trotting up to the attic, I pulled the gown out of the garment bag, Carried it lovingly downstairs, Ran my hand over the fabric, And hung it on the door. I had prepared for it like any intelligent woman would. I stripped naked, Looked in the mirror, Sighed, and thought, "Well, okay, Maybe if I shift it all to the back ..." Bodies never have pockets where you need them. Bravely I took the gown off the hanger, Unzipped the shimmering dress and stepped gingerly into it. I struggled, twisted, turned, and pulled And I got the formal all the way up to my knees ... Before the zipper gave out. I was disappointed. I wanted to wear that dress with those silver sandals again And dance the night away. Okay, One setback was not going to spoil my mood for this affair. No way! Rolling the dress into a ball and tossing it into the corner, I turned to Plan B: The black crepe caftan. I gathered up all the goodies that I had purchased at Saks: The scented shower gel; The body building and highlighting shampoo and conditioner; The split-end killer and shine Enhancer. Soon my hair would look like that girl's in the Pantene ads. Then the makeup -- The under eye "ain't no lines here" firming cream, The all-day face-lifting gravity-fighting moisturizer with wrinkle filler spackle; The 'all day kiss me till my lips bleed, and see if this gloss will come off' lipstick, The bronzing face powder for that special glow. But first, The roll-on facial hair remover. I could feel the wrinkles shuddering in fear. Okay, Time to get ready! I jumped into the steaming shower, Soaped, lathered, rinsed, shaved, tweezed, buffed, Scrubbed and scoured my body to a tingling pink. I plastered my freshly scrubbed face with the Anti-wrinkle, gravity fighting "your face will look like a baby's posterior" face cream. I set my hair on hot rollers. I felt wonderful. Ready to take on the world. Or in this instance, My underwear. With the towel firmly wrapped around my glistening body, I grabbed the black lace, tummy-tucking, cellulite-pushing, ham hock-rounding girdle, And the matching "lifting those bosoms like they're filled with helium" bra. I greased my body with the scented body lotion and began the plunge. I pulled, stretched, tugged, folded, tucked, twisted, shimmied, Hopped, pushed, wiggled, shook, caterpillar crawled and kicked. Sweat poured off my forehead but I was done. And it didn't look bad. So I rested. A well deserved rest, too. The girdle was on my body. Bounce a quarter off my behind? It was tighter than a trampoline. Can you say, "Rubber baby buggy bumper buns?" Okay, So I had to take baby steps, And walk sideways, And I couldn't move from my buns to my knees. But I was firm! Oh no I had to go to the bathroom. And there wasn't a snap crotch. From now on, Undies gotta have a snap crotch. I was ready to rip it open and re-stitch the crotch with Velcro, But the pain from past experiments was still fresh in my mind. I quickly sidestepped to the bathroom. An hour later, I had answered nature's call and repeated the struggle into the girdle. I was ready for the bra. I remembered what the saleslady said to do. I could see her glossed lips mouthing, "Do not fasten the bra in the front, and twist it around. Put the bra on the way it should be worn -- Straps over the shoulders. Then bend over and gently place both breasts inside the cups." Easy if you have four hands. But, with confidence, I put my arms into the holsters, Bent over and pulled the bra down ... But the boobs weren't cooperating. I'd no sooner tuck one in a cup, and while placing the other, the first would slip out. I needed a strategy. I bounced up and down a few times, tried to dribble them in with short bunny hops, but that didn't work. So, while bent over, I began rocking gently back and forth on my heel and toes and I set 'em to swinging. Finally, on the fourth swing, pause, and lift, I captured the gliding glands. Quickly fastening the back of the bra, I stood up for examination. Back straight, slightly arched, I turned and faced the mirror, turning front, and then sideways. I smiled, yes, Houston , we have lift up! My breasts were high, firm and there was cleavage! I was happy until I tried to look down. I had a chin rest. And I couldn't see my feet. I still had to put on my pantyhose, and shoes. Oh ... why did I buy heels with buckles? Then I had to pee again. So I put on my sweats, fixed myself a drink, ordered pizza, and skipped the high school reunion. If this did not give you a good laugh -- you're too young!" It is the spirit of the person that makes them beautiful so wear the remembrances of every little thing with pride, all that I have met here are beautiful and i have not met any in person yet.

WEll of course there's the song by David Mallet song "Inch by inch, row by row - gonna make this garden grow - all it takes is a rake and a hoe and a bit of fertile ground." . . . But, I also make up my own songs while I am out in the garden. Here's one I wrote last year after finding deer tracks everywhere. A Song to Sing While Working in the Garden Stay out of my garden you mangey ole deer Your presence is definitely not wanted here I see your footprints in the early morning light So I know you visited my garden last nite. YouÂve been biting my beans and chompin my corn Your destruction is leavin me oh so forlorn! I planted this garden for me  not for you So you mangey ole deer  just stay outta here! Stay out of my garden you ole woodchuck you I definitely donÂt want what you came here to do YouÂve left holes in the rows I so neatly have sown Your destruction is making me we-ep and moan I planted this garden for me not for you So stay out of my garden you ol groundhog you. Stay out of my garden dear bunnies so sweet Go somewhere else to find something to eat I planted this garden for me not for you So stay out of my garden you little bunnies you. Stay out of my garden you ugly ol bugs My gardenÂs off limits to you thieves and thugs DonÂt want your destruction in my garden so dear So you ugly ol bugs  just stay out of here. If IÂve failed to mention all you culprits by name The message is still just one and the same I planted this garden for me not for you So stay out of my garden  yes that includes you! © May 23, 2007 Sherrieflower And sometimes I sing another I made up: Guardian angels guard my garden keep it safe from all that would destroy Guardian angels guard my garden so abundant harvests I'll enjoy. :)

often on my way to work i'll play talking heads and i'll laugh myself all the way there w/ this... i'm on the road to nowhere (LOL) WELL WE KNOW WHERE WE'RE GOIN' BUT WE DON'T KNOW WHERE WE'VE BEEN AND WE KNOW WHAT WE'RE KNOWIN' BUT WE CAN'T SAY WHAT WE'VE SEEN AND WE'RE NOT LITTLE CHILDREN AND WE KNOW WHAT WE WANT AND THE FUTURE IS CERTAIN GIVE US TIME TO WORK IT OUT We're on a road to nowhere Come on inside Takin' that ride to nowhere We'll take that ride I'm feelin' okay this mornin' And you know, We're on the road to paradise Here we go, here we go CHORUS Maybe you wonder where you are I don't care Here is where time is on our side Take you there...take you there We're on a road to nowhere We're on a road to nowhere We're on a road to nowhere There's a city in my mind Come along and take that ride and it's all right, baby, it's all right And it's very far away But it's growing day by day And it's all right, baby, it's all right They can tell you what to do But they'll make a fool of you And it's all right, baby, it's all right We're on a road to nowhere i'm an 80's child, extremely well educated, working in a job where i'm well paid but utilize very little of my knowledge and feel like i'm going nowhere fast...lol but atleast well paid lol. it's part of a bigger plan for my life... another fav is sinatra's the best is yet to come. it was the last song at both of our wedding receptions. it represents to me that even thou i've have a fabulous life so far there is even more fabulous thigs still ahead. i absolutely worship music and have tons of songs that have meaning for something in my past or life now that i relate to all the time :-) ~ liz

Very pretty Marion Cute Girl and Boy there. I love those two colour combinations as well They go together real good in my garden also Both lovely gentle plants...Cheers.MM.