Playing violin for my friend who passed

15 years ago

I mentioned here last week that i was asked by my closest friend to play by her husband's bedside as they removed machinery -

Well that was yesterday. The plan was go to at 5, and so I cancelled two therapy sessions, and kept the one at 1. at 1:40, I received a call from my friend's adult daughter and there was just silence on the phone - she couldn't talk - I said "I'm on my way" and ended session abruptly - my client was gracious -

It took an hour to drive there, and I kept begging in my head for him to hold on, hold on -

Got there and turned the corner not knowing if the room would be empty. It wasn't - I'd made it - turns out he held on for the rest of the day.

I won't talk about the experience here as I see it as sacred but I will share that at about 8, i was prompted to go home. I played a final song and my husband and I headed out. He died 10 minutes later. It just felt right that the moment was preserved for just the family.

I'd like to share a song here if that's okay -

Tears will put the shine on your fiddle

Don't ever underestimate the power of a little love in a song

THere's a song about the drink

and there's a song to make you think

about the one who broke your heart and how he done you wrong

and there's a song to make you sing along

But the one that matters most will make you cry

It's the one we sing when it's time to say goodbye

Love you (( ))

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Comments (14)

liljunkr
15 years ago
Thank you

(( )) Love you
marylmi
15 years ago
I love violin music. I had my brother play "Amazing Grace" on the violin at my husband's funeral. The minister accompanied him on his guitar and sang the lyrics. It was very touching and beautiful!
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sjerin
15 years ago
That everyone should have such a beautiful death! You have given that family such a gift.
lynn_d
15 years ago
What a dear friend you are, Amy, you truly are a blessing in those lives. I'm so sorry for the loss, but what a peaceful passing.
dotmom
15 years ago
Your story brought tear to my eyes. What a beautiful gift and send off. You are a good and kind friend. Bless you, Amyfiddler.
hallngarden
15 years ago
Amy, what a wonderful gift of music. Yes, your story brought tears to my eyes also. Your generous gift of music will be cherished by your friends. I have read several of your post and first thing comes to mind , is you are a very wise and generous person. Know that you are blest with lots of loving friends.
alisande
15 years ago
Amy, how lovely.

I'm reminded of something I wrote to a friend just this week:

I used the term Ã¢ÂÂgood deathÃ¢ÂÂ in conversation once, and the friend I was talking to looked appalled. But since none of us can hope for no death (and many would say thatÃ¢ÂÂs a good thing), the best we can hope for is a good one.......peaceful and in accordance with our wishes.

When my husband lay dying in a nursing home, I brought his favorite CDs (Shostakovich's 5th Symphony and Brahms' German Requiem) and played them to the end.

I'm sure your friends appreciate what you did more than they can say.
joann23456
15 years ago
As Susan said, you helped him have a good death. Well done.
amyfiddler
Original Author
15 years ago
Oh, seriously, he had a marvelous end to his life. If only I could relay the uniqueness of this particular family, and how expressive they are with their loving. If I were to share the details we'd all be sobbing - my part was so small. I felt so humbled to witness it. It brings me to tears. I could only hope for such a sweet end for myself and my own loved ones. I know I have to start today, creating that environment around me, being more loving and serving as he was. He was, is, a uniquely wonderful man. Thanks for sharing in these thoughts with me KT. :)
kacram
15 years ago
how wonderful, Amy. I'm glad you were able to
help him and his family.
maire_cate
15 years ago
Amy I'm so glad you could share a little of your experience. What a wonderful and unique gift you were able to share with them.
Kathsgrdn
15 years ago
There's a little girl and her family who come around Christmastime to play her violin for the vets. It always makes me cry, it's so beautiful.
glenda_al
15 years ago
U are a mighty special person! Hugs for you!
des_arc_ya_ya
15 years ago
Amy, you did a very special deed for a friend and her family. I'm sure that they will never forget your kindness.

Playing violin for my friend who passed

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