skip to main content

The Kitchen Table

What Kind of Wedding Gift

16 years ago

My girlfreinds daughter has been living with her partner for 15 years and they have 2 children. Now they are getting married. I just don't know what to buy as a gift, I am sure they have everything they need after all this time living together.

Sort by:Oldest

Comments (11)

monica_pa Grieves
16 years ago
A gift certificate for dinner at a nice local restaurant.
mimi_boo
16 years ago
A donation to their favorite charity.
Related Discussions
My oldest sister's 50th wedding anniversary. Ideas? Gift obligati
Q
Comments (8)
Great ideas, everyone! Pbrisjar, they wanted to have a BBQ at home too. Now they think it is at their daughter's house. She thinks they will freak out at the cost and they do not intend to tell them. She is letting them think that until a couple days before. They are not fancy, have buried both sets of parents and have more than they need. She's always trying to give stuff away (nieces, nephews, kids, etc.) She is my mother's daughter - "everything should be put to good use." They have a modest home in Mexico and modest home here. When they aren't in Mexico or here, they live on a boat in Canada. They would think flowers were a big waste of money. LOL! A cake may be nice because we all could enjoy but I'm hesitant to ask the restaurant to serve the cake. It's the kids' party and I don't want to seem like I'm taking over, YKWIM? If it was going to be at someone's house, I'd do a cake in a heartbeat. Great idea. As for this couple, they still drive the Toyota they bought (used) when the kids were young (it's immaculate). You could say they live life to the fullest, between their camper and boat, and two *very* modest homes. My sister cuts her hair every three months, so when she cuts it, she cuts it very, very short. :+" My sister thinks my house is fancy and it's always a work in progress. LOL!
...See More
What to spend for a wedding gift
Q
Comments (28)
I also read this post with great interest.. not sure why LOL as I don't have children and am not all that keen on getting married myself (though not opposed to it in theory LOL). I agree with Barb that there is or should be no expectation for guests to cover the costs of their plate. At the same time I agree with mitchdesj that it is a good guideline for those of us who struggle with how much to spend. It makes sense if you can afford it-- but it surely isnt expected. As a twenty-something, I couldnt have afforded to cover my plate for the NYC and Phila "do it big" weddings I am very close with my nieces and nephews (7) and tend to be generous with gifts. I spend a little more on birthdays, graduations etc but I also spend a lot of timing coming up with gifts that support their interests, budding careers and education etc. All are too young for wedding gifts, but I expect that I will also be generous in helping them to establish and celebrate their new lives. My situation is somewhat unique though-- I don't have my own kids and I take an active role in helping to raise the nieces and nephews-- not because their parents don't or can't but more to balance their parents. I am somewhat of a matriarch in the family-- or more correctly the crazy and generous aunt. (My dad calls me auntie mame) OK, so that said, today at this point of my life, I would give $1000 as a wedding gift to a niece or nephew. For a nonfamily close friend it would be more in the 100-200 range... though I will be honest, unless I am giving "big money" I tend to give special selected gifts.
...See More
What to get for a wedding gift !!!
Q
Comments (8)
For sure I would look for her registry first. But if she doesn't have one, or if you don't like buying off a registry, I like socks12345's suggestions very much. We got most of those things for our wedding, and we really loved them. Here are some other gifts I have enjoyed receiving and giving: water pitchers, nice grapefruit spoons, and serving spoons and forks. I don't know if this is big enough (it costs about $30), but I just bought the most wonderful little appliance (on the advice of someone at the cooking forum -- thanks, jessy!): a hand (immersion) blender that has a whisk attachment and best of all a mini-food processor attachment. The one I bought is by Braun, but others make them. If that's not quite big enough, perhaps a 3-cup food processor would be a nice gift. Both of those are easily exchangeable by the couple if they don't need them. As for cash, as you can see from a glance through these boards, in some communities, especially in the northeast, cash is by far the most common gift. In others, especially some in the south, cash is considered too impersonal. Individual circumstances can make cash a good or bad choice, too, irrespective of community customs. So we can't tell you whether it is a good choice for this wedding.
...See More
Wedding gift (cash) - going rate these days?
Q
Comments (21)
I think it could depend on the relationship with him as well as what it will cost in travel and accomadations. Also what you can afford. My family has a huge range of wealth or lack of, so some could spend the 2 grand to travel and give another 1000 on top. I tend to be overly generous being squarly in the middle financially. I recently had two events for two nephews. One a wedding and one a ”major award”. I could not attend yhe wedding so I gave 1000 which was still less thanwe would have spent to travel along with something I had from his grandad for sentiment. The other nephew I spent a couple grand on travel and hotel and made a painting of our hometown and a gift of 500.
...See More
talley_sue_nyc
16 years ago
They're probably writing on some other board, "How do I tell people that, since we have everything we need after all this time living together, they should just give us money?"

And people like me are saying, "Don't ask for it; that's rude. Everyone knows you have everything you need after all this time living together; they'll just naturally give you money."

Give them money.

(Or, call them up and ask where they're registered; maybe there's an idea on their registry list)
susanjf_gw
16 years ago
the one nice present, for those who have it all, is home depot or lowes g/c...also (but to me kind of tacky on the couples part) is honeymoon cash...

it really depends on how much you want to spend, and feel about the couple...
mrsmarv
16 years ago
Hmmm....they've been living together for 15 years and have 2 kids. I wouldn't give cash because after 15 years and 2 kids they've established their union, so to speak. To me, cash is reserved for those who are getting married and have no "history", meaning no shared domicile, no kids. I second the gift certificate to a nice restaurant or Home Depot/Lowe's.
vannie
16 years ago
Funny you should mention this. I'm facing the same situation. This couple has only been together 2 yrs.and only have 1 child, but still.... They're having a very expensive wedding ($100. per guest); I just bit the bullet and bought them something they'd registered for. Times, they are a changing!
stephanie_in_ga
16 years ago
Maybe that's why they're getting married, time for new household stuff. DH and I have been married for 15 years and I was joking to my mom that we need to have another wedding, I could really use some new towels and sheets. ;o) Has this couple registered? I also joke that I'm going to register like a bride so when family asks what to get us for Christmas they know what color towels to get and what new flatware pattern I like (we've lost a lot of spoons, I don't know why).

But seriously, even though we've been set up in our own household for 15 years, there are still some household items that would make good gifts b/c they don't last forever. And new gadgets that would make good gifts.

You could do a cooking basket, gourmet food stuffs or coffees. A good bottle of wine. Tickets to an event. Photo frames.
ritamay91710
16 years ago
Staphanie... I say that too!!! It'll be 16 years for us May 9th. I need new stuff!!! LOL!!!
evatx
16 years ago
Our friend's son is getting married after living with the bride-to-be for about 10 years. We're giving them a gift card to Home Depot since they combined two households of "things" when they started living together.
rosebudms
16 years ago
A nice card from Hallmark.
jannie
16 years ago
If they registered a gift list with any stores, I would go with something on their list. Needn't be the most expensive thing. When my nephew got married last July, they registered at Bed Bath and Beyond and there were items at any price, even $5.

Related Stories

PRODUCT PICKS Guest Picks: Wedding Gifts They’ll Cherish

Let someone else buy the blender. These are wedding gifts the happy couple will really love to have and to hold

SHOP HOUZZ Houzz Products: Great Wedding Gifts for Modern Couples

Give newlyweds a gift as memorable as the day itself, to have and to hold in a special place at home

FARM YOUR YARD Houzz Call: Show Us Your One-of-a-Kind Chicken Coops

By Annie Thornton

Do you have a fun or stylish backyard shelter for your feathered friends? Post your pictures and stories in the Comments!

SHOP HOUZZ Shop Houzz: The Best Wedding Gifts Under $100

Wedding gifts to make the bride and groom swoon

0

SHOP HOUZZ Shop Houzz: Classic and Quirky Wedding Gifts Under $200

Find the perfect classic or quirky wedding gift for the newlyweds — all for under $200

0

SHOP HOUZZ Shop Houzz: Wedding Gifts for Home Chefs

The best wedding gifts for foodies, by price

SHOP HOUZZ Shop Houzz: Great Wedding Gifts for Guys

Give him a unique gift that shows you care and speaks to his true style

0

SHOP HOUZZ Shop Houzz: Smart Wedding Gifts They’ll Actually Use

A variety of gifts at every price point for your favorite newlyweds

0

SHOP HOUZZ Shop Houzz: Wedding Gifts for Every Couple

Presents they’ll love and use on more than just special occasions

0

SHOP HOUZZ Shop Houzz: Picking the Perfect Wedding Gift

Stories and memories personalize any present whether you stick to the registry or go rogue

0

Sponsored

J.Holderby - Renovations

4 Reviews

Franklin County's Leading General Contractors - 2X Best of Houzz!

More Discussions

Oh no! Another one!

743

Have you found any bargains or deals lately?

52

Let's start a chain reaction game -- Part 4

224

Nespresso machine?

20

Little hack for turning cold butter into spreadable butter in seconds

14