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The Kitchen Table

When does it become road rage?

14 years ago

My husband and I disagree on this. As an example, he says it starts when a driver cuts him off. I say it starts if my husband responds to the cutting off by approaching the other driver.

It's a fine line, but I'm curious as to the answer.

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Comments (14)

heather_on
14 years ago
I wouldn't consider it road rage if a driver accidently cut me off. I would consider it road rage if I responded in anger to being cut off.
User
14 years ago
I think there's a difference between drivers being rude and self centered (and there are lots of those) and drivers who have road-rage. To me, road-rage is when a driver is so full of anger and aggression that they try to get revenge against someone.
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carla35
14 years ago
Road Rage would be the Rage you get from a driver cutting you off.

Cutting someone off itself is not road rage unless you are cutting someone off purpposly as a response to something the other driver did. Like they cut you off first, so you get in front and cut them off. At least that's how I see it.
azzalea
14 years ago
Maybe you're actually saying the same thing.

He says 'it' starts when a driver cuts him off. Presuming your husband is referring to the rage that starts in HIM (your husband)--yes, I'd say that's when the road rage starts--for your husband. And you're right that that road rage becomes a visible thing when your husband acts on it. That's a really fine line, though--does it really make any difference whether your husband's rage starts at one point? or one a few seconds later?

The pronouns used (or not used) in your discussion make all the difference. It's actually hard to answer, because I'm not sure if your husband is referring to the other driver as having road rage (causing the cutting off), or to himself--that the cutting off is the start of his (husband's) road rage reaction.
cheerful1_gw
Original Author
14 years ago
Husband thinks the other driver is having the road rage by cutting him off, so that would justify husband having road rage reaction.
marie_ndcal
14 years ago
Be aware that road rage ticket in CA could be a felony and jail time. They had so much of it they changed the law several years ago and it did help out.
gadgets
14 years ago
About 25 yrs ago, the husband of my friend's daughter was in a rage related accident. I don't remember who did the cutting off, who did the chasing, which ended up in a terrible accident. The accident put the young man into a coma which lasted many years. Even when he partially came to, he had irreversible severe brain damage and he had to live in a Home until he died a couple of years ago. Such a waste!

Shirley
susan_on
14 years ago
I think that if it happens often enough that you two are discussing it, I think it's starting with him.
cheerful1_gw
Original Author
14 years ago
I think the whole idea of road rage is so stupid. There's too much impatience in the world, along with the rudeness and self-centeredness. Too many people get hurt and killed because of it.

As for the initial cutting off, and the response to that - two wrongs don't make a right.
redcurls
14 years ago
I think that the term comes into play only when it is in RESPONSE to something else.
bee0hio
14 years ago
That your husband is justifying an aggressive response on his part sounds scary to me. The other driver may or may not be having his own road rage. If your husband responds in kind, then you have 2 fools ragers on the road. Yikes!
sylviatexas1
14 years ago
"Husband thinks the other driver is having the road rage by cutting him off, so that would justify husband having road rage reaction."

That's the same rationale as "I didn't mean to beat the stuffing out of my wife & put her in the hospital with black eyes & broken bones & missing teeth;
it's *her* fault*, because *she* (fill in the blank):

made me so angry (I was spoiling for a fight & just looking at her "made" me angry)/

scorched my shirt (because I roared at her to "get in here this minute & bring me my shoes)

/was sitting down
/was standing up/

eats too much/
won't eat enough/

doesn't talk to my friends/
talks to my friends/

& one of my all-time favorites,
'interfered with my disciplining one of the children', which often consists of beating the daylights out of said child.

People who fly into rages do it because they love it; people who blame other people for their behavior are dangerous & you cannot reason with them;
they *like* being the way they are.
joyfulguy
14 years ago
Do I note a little rage around here?

I guess the incipient rage in husbnd is when it gets him bent out of shape ...

... but it seems to me that what we usually refer to road rage is when the angrified one relates directly to/confronts the other driver.

ole joyful
cynic
14 years ago
Some states have laws about aggressive driving which curiously can include blowing your horn too long or too often. (I think it should include honking your horn when you lock/unlock your vehicle too, but I digress.) Don't know if they say how many seconds you can honk without a ticket though. I think California is the only state in the US that has an actual "Road Rage" definition and perhaps not surprisingly it's supposedly the state the term "road rage" originated.

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