Glenda, even though you are not close I would ask her, so many treatments are different now, you have no way of knowing if you don't ask.

That may be very difficult to answer, side effects from chemo can vary so widely with the patient. Unless you know someone who has taken her, you may either have to ask her, or wait and see what she may need or want. It could be nausea (although if that's been a problem they have probably tweaked her drugs or added something to combat that), to plain old fatigue, or nothing immediately with side effects showing up several to many hours later. You might want to keep your day open on the chance she would like company, tea, someone there but I think there's a good chance she'll have a routine in place after this many treatments.

I think in your shoes I would try to stay my most intuitive, take my ques from her. If she seems in need of attention, do what you can, and if she clearly doesn't want anyone to hover, don't :) I don't hover very well but can if I'm called on to do that....now DH, he can hover ...

And bless you, I'm sure the kindnesses she's receiving are making a difference in her recovery.

Wondering what I should expect after she finishes her treatment.

It depends on what type of chemo she is getting but I think it's safe to assume that she will feel tired. My experience with my husband when he went through chemo was that he was very tired after the chemo application and napped for the rest of the day. The next day he had an infusion of energy and felt fine.

Lunch?

Again, it depends of the type of chemo...but I would say "no" unless you've discussed it with her prior to her appointment and she agrees.

How she will feel?

Tired.

With today's chemo applications most oncology chemo departments give an anti-nausea injection or drip before they start the chemo procedure to either eliminate nausea or greatly reduce the possibility of nausea.

Do I stay when I take her home?

I would ask her directly. Otherwise, I would not...simply because she will probably want to go to bed or settle down for a long nap.

My replies are based on my own experience, Glenda, and I hope they help. But beyond them, I wouldn't hesitate to ask her directly. Most chemo patients that I've known were more than willing to assist us with their care. They're usually realists and when they know we want to help...they'll do what they can to facilitate that help.

Bless you for being so caring.

Anne

After the chemo session, she will likely be tired and a may be a bit testy. You will, of course, take her home. After that, the schedule is unpredictable.

I advise that you ask her before the procedure what she wants afterward. Also, consult with the hospital staff. They may recommend that you stay with her until her evening support arrives home. The other possibility is she may wish to settle down to sleep it off, and will dismiss you.

Yes, Glenda...just ask her on your way over. It would be kind of you to talk about it; she will know that you want to do anything you can to make her comfortable.

If you prefer not to ask her, is it possible to ask the daughter?

Glenda, I agree that you should just ask her....From my own experience, my DH brought me home and put me to bed....I stayed there the rest of the day .....but....all chemo's are different as has been mentioned so just let her tell you what....During the chemo, they will probably give her Benadryl or a like medicine and she will be a little groggy and need to sleep that off. The chemo chairs are pretty comfy but it is still sitting for several hours and it wears you out....

You and your friends might want to provide her with a few meals, that helped me so much...My friends kept us fed and it sure was a big help.

If members of the Bible Study are going to be doing this to help relieve the daughter occasionally, then I think it would be very nice if the daughter would provide some guidelines with just this sort of information for the helpers. Maybe you, or one of the others, could contact her and ask her to do that.

It is wonderful that you are doing this. Are you the first one of the group to do so? If not, perhaps those who have done it before you can tell you of their experience.

My mother was never tired after her chemo infusions, and she was always VERY hungry afterwards. Her tiredness didn't start until about two days post-chemo.

Everyone's chemo experience is different. My DH drove himself to and from chemo and didn't even want me there. As the nurses explained it, this was his place and he didn't want me interfering. I would come right out and ask her, let her know you're available if she needs you and then back off.

What everyone said here is true. Cemo treatments are different for everyone. When I went through mine it was not difficult. I was somewhat tired and most foods did not taste good. I would talk to her daughter. I can tell you people bringing in food helped so much. If she is a single gal, single servings that could be froze for later is really nice. It is so nice of you to help her and give the daughter some relief, too.

Friend and I visit with her frequently, every other week. We take lunch, chat, and last time we played Mexican Train, BUT we told her each time, to let us know when she was ready to rest and we'd leave.

Which she did and Which we did also.

She asked me to drive her, and she needs someone to take her each time, that's why she gave me Monday as the date for me to drive.

We had all told her her daughter would probably welcome others to help take her which is greatly appreciated by friend and her daughter.

Thanks for the info.

This lady (and her daughter) are so fortunate to have this extra help. Not everyone will devote the better part of a day to help an acquaintance.

It sounds as though you'll need to play it by ear. I'd guess that every treatment is tolerated differently on a given day -- even by the same person.

*I* always feel I should be 'hostessing' anyone in my home, so unless I felt very weak, I'd probably be less stressed being left alone for the afternoon, perhaps with a light lunch available to be 'nuked'. This lady may want company -- or be hungry. You can volunteer your day to her on the way to the hospital.

Bring a book for the wait, and possibly to read at her home if she needs you to stay. Won't YOU get hungry? Do you have a contact number for her daughter?

When I went with people I would stay with them if they felt like chatting, otherwise I'd take a walk around the place and drop in the chapel for a while. Take a book. As for what we needs from you, just ask her. It's difficult for a patient to ask a caregiver to stay so I always made the initiative. Sometimes we ate afterwards, other times she'd be freezing and I always had a blanket and pillow in the car. Most times we'd get to her house and she'd sleep. If that was what she wanted, I'd leave but always check on her by phone about 3 hours later. Keep up the good work. We actually had fun many of the times.

Am going thru that with DH now and chemo treatments. Like several stated, find out ahead of time from the medical staff and the person. Some people do not like the caretakers to know, but that is wrong. They need to know to protect the person and themselves. And each treatment is different. Sometimes they feel great--other times they are really down and/or sick.

So many answers, but I'm sure that once you're on your way to the hospital you will feel a little more at ease. Nothing wrong in asking her on the way home if she'd like to go for lunch or pick something up on the way. I like Ruthie's idea of putting together some freezer meals. If all, or most, of the SS class did one a week, it would probably be a blessing for her daughter-- especially if you cook for them.

:o) She's well taken care of in the food department. Last time I was there, someone knocked on her door and handed her a freshly made chicken pot pie.

Her church class takes good care of their class members~