Connie, I am glad to hear your DH passed his cardio stress tess. Have the Dr.'s checked your DH for Meniere's. I have provided a link for you. My cousin and my Aunt both had this and suffer periods of light headness and dizziness. I used to be the Queen of dizziness but mine relates back to fluid in my ear. When I was a kid our old family doctor made me take Dristan tablets all time to dry up the fluid. Now just taking a daily diruretic fixed that problem but sometimes I still suffer from serious bouts of vertigo and other times just light headed dizziness. I am prone to ear infections too which doesn't help any. I hope he your DH finds out what is wrong soon. Feeling light headed and dizzy all the time is not a good way to feel. Anne Here is a link that might be useful: Meniere's Disease

I'm so sorry you're going through this. My sister is bipolar type 2, with rapid cycling, and I watched my mother try to deal with her. (Fortunately or unfortunately, my sister self-medicated with food, not drugs or alcohol, so she wasn't a physical danger to herself.) I *so* understand that you're afraid of alienating your daughter, and are worried that she'll leave and you won't see her. The only thing I know for sure is that nothing good ever comes out of acting from fear. I'll tell you my bias. I watched my mother do much the same with my sister as you're doing with your daughter. My mother's main concerns were keeping my sister relatively calm and not letting her break their relationship. My mother did things she *knew* were counter-productive, because she was afraid of losing my sister. She "helped" my sister in school - to the point of actually doing many of her assignments. She wrote absence excuse notes for fake illnesses. She provided my sister with spending money. (I, OTOH, started working at age 15.) Later on, my mother gave my sister a place to live, rent-free. She paid for everything - clothes, food, utilities, car insurance, gas ... you name it. My sister got a good education and could get good jobs, but when she got them, she spent all her money on spending sprees. (In one week in 1986, she bought a $20,000 car, a $2,000 exercise machine, $1,500 of stereo equipment, $1,000 in CD's, and probably a whole lot more stuff I never knew about.) My mother eventually gave her money, because she didn't want to lose my sister. (By that time, it wasn't a physical loss she was afraid of, but my sister would go into her room and completely ignore my mother if she didn't like what my mom was doing.) When her illness cycled, my sister would rage at my mother. (In type 2 bipolar, the manic cycle is more a matter of anger than what we think of as mania.) My sister would throw books and scream and make life miserable, but my mother took it, because she was afraid my sister would stop talking to her. My sister lived with my mom until the day my mother died. One of the last things my mother said to me was, "Take care of your sister." Well, I loved my mother enormously, but *THAT* wasn't going to happen, at least not the way my mother was doing it. Once my sister lost her safety net and had to be responsible for herself, she managed to do it. My sister is still ill, on multiple medications, and is hospitalized from time to time, but now she's much more responsible. She holds down a full-time job, something she hadn't done for more than a couple months at a time before my mom died. My sister will tell you that what my mother did for her, though it was done out of love (and fear), made her illness worse, not better. She'll also tell you that while she loved our mother, she never respected her. I don't know if any of this strikes a chord, but there it is. I can't say what you should do, because I'm not in your situation. I just want to urge you to consider that you're not just hurting yourself by placating your daughter to the extent you've described, you're actually hurting her. I keep thinking of that old adage about the definition of madness being doing the same thing over and over and expecting the results to change. I think you know you have to do something different, because you don't like the results you're getting. As to why bipolar illness (and ADHD, and all the rest) are diagnosed so often today, who knows? Personally, I think they're real illnesses and have been around forever, but they're also over-diagnosed. You don't need to solve the societal problem, though, you just need to figure out what's happening with your daughter. If she *does* have bipolar illness, then it doesn't really matter if 10,000 other people have been misdiagnosed with bipolar. And if she doesn't have it, many of the things you need to do are still the same. (BTW, I agree with Alisande that you're right to look at the diagnosis with a critical eye, and ask for a second opinion.) I'm sorry if anything I've written makes it sound like there's anything remotely simple about the problems you're facing. I wish you the best of luck.

Maybe they can just have a simple ceremony with just family, then have a large party for their 1st anniversary. DD got married privately on New Years Eve. My son married them and his future wife witnessed. A year later they threw a huge anniversary party for friends and family. It turned out sooo much better than a wedding/reception/off to honeymoon thing. They were able to focus on the celebration, without wedding stress. Although they did not plan the evening as a wedding party all their friends treated it as such, bearing gifts, love and good wishes. They had a whole pirate theme going and all the guests from 20 somethings to 90 joined in the fun. It is still talked about to this day. Other people have albums, they have shared memories that are still frequently brought up 10 years later.

Undertones are tricky and the lighter, more reflective the color the trickier undertones become. What is "No undertone" in one home on one surface may be pink or green or blue in another. We have multiple things at play. The color itself has certain physical properties. Luminance, Chroma and Hue. The surface it is painted on may be smooth or rough and that will change how the light reflects off the surface. The paint has different gloss levels which changes how much light is reflected off the paint. Then you add in the quality and color of the light that is either coming through the windows or produced by artificial lighting in your home. The last part of the equation is the colors that surround the color you are looking at. Our brains receive about 11 million bits of information per second, but we only process about 50 bits of information per second. Our brain groups data so that it is easier to ingest. (Cool fact - when we hear a sentence our brain fires electromagnetic energy from different areas for nouns vs adjectives vs verbs etc. Even if you don't know the parts of speech your brain organizes types of words in different spaces.) When we see white we automatically compare it to every other color in the space and the brain decides how to process the information as a whole, not each individual color. We can make some assumptions based on comparison of whites to pure neutral white and say this will most likely have a blue undertone because it is bluer or grayer than pure neutral white, but if you place the white next to a brilliant pastel blue it may look more green or more purple than the blue. We also associate gray with blue. Remember how we see less color when we are depressed? What do we say? "I feel blue today". We're not seeing more blue, we are seeing more gray, but our brain groups gray and blue together. The best way I have found to test if my colors will work together or fight with each other is to look at the combinations outside around 2:00 in the afternoon on a sunny day. If they look good together they will still look good together when the color/quality of the light changes. They may not look the same, but the colors will all be impacted the same way by the light and will still work or not work together. Natural daylight reveals subtle color differences that you may miss with artificial or filtered light.