I've learned that given a choice between things I like equally (fabric,flooring,or rug, etc.) I'm better off selecting the one that shows the least amount of dirt, specks, smears or pet hair.

Great thread. We all need reminders of these! All of the following are the result of me breaking the rule, and living to regret it.

1) Couch/chair rule. Must sit in it first. No exceptions, no matter what the website is telling you about all the wonderful things that are used to make the frame, coils, foam, etc.

2) Every piece should serve an importatnt function, and that can include just being pleasant to look at, but you must REALLY love it if that's all it's offering.

3) When offered a choice, go for versatiity in a piece, like a table that can become larger or smaller, or a cabinet that can work for different types of storage.

4) It's much easier to buy something than to sell something. Even with the wonderful phenomenon of Craig's List, don't buy thinking you could just re sell it if it doesn't work out. When your mind goes there, it's a mistake just waiting to happen.

I look forward to reading more. It's always a comfort to know I'm not alone!

So true. I know although I adore beautiful fabrics, I have to leave the delicate stuff behind in the store - doesn't fit into our pet friendly lifestyle.

I believe the "Decorate for the way you live, not the way you want to live." was from Magnaverde - one of his pearls of wisdom LOL.

1. I'd rather leave a wall blank while I wait for something that speaks to me than fill it with junk from TJMaxx/Marshalls etc. I actually avoid going near those stores unless I'm looking for something specific.

2. I use the internet extensively getting ideas, researching materials and making purchases for items that prior to the internet I didn't even have access to buying.

3. I spend a little time while on vacation looking for something to bring home for my home - not junky touristy things, but something that is truly useful that I wouldn't find easily at home. Doesn't even have to be exotic - I went to Room and Board and Ligne Roset when I visited Chicago and bought some furniture that when I use it daily it reminds me of Chicago and the windy, rainy cold day that we walked from the hotel over to R&B and Ligne Roset.

Sky

Never allow yourself to be pressed for an immediate decision when selecting upholstery fabric (or other important fabric decisions) without first seeing a sample in your home. (Learn from my mistake!) It will be a costly fix, but I will have those chair reupholstered someday!
And while considering fabric samples -- stand way back from the swatch. It's a more realistic perspective of how the pattern and color will look on a piece of furniture.

1. Get a tiny notebook, and put in little swatches of your fabrics and paints, and carry it with you always.

2. If you don't love it, get rid of it.

Well, I have to say that I found the same rug at TJ Maxx for $999 that Horchow was selling for $2400 and I jumped on it like an ugly suit on a pimp, but then if you can afford to pay the $2400 and feel that you got something better, so note it be.

Buy the highest quality you can afford, even if you have to wait longer to save for it before you can get it. It is actually cheaper in the long run because quality pieces last longer.

1) Cash only!
2) Shop used first
3) No dry clean anything
4) It's always better for me to take my time
5) Clutter and collections are more expensive than their original price tag. They require furniture, cleaning and time, organization, containment, and square footage.
6) Basement food storage is WAY cheaper than kitchen food storage. Utility shelves and plastic tubs versus $$$$ walnut pantry.
7) Walls don't have to be colors.

patricia43, I'm not sure if your remark about a pimp was directed to me or not. I have no problem buying the same carpet in TJ Maxx for less than in Horchow. What I am referring to is trolling TJ Maxx on a regular basis when you don't really need anything and coming home with all kinds of meaningless trinkets that you don't need etc. When I need something specific I hit every stop along the way and that includes TJ Maxx types of stores and where ever else I think I might find it cheapest. LOL

Sky

One of my big lessons is that procrastination is not a bad thing. More often than not the burning desire I have to buy something or re-do something will pass, given enough time. And since I procrastinate - a lot! - there are many many things I'm glad I never got around to doing because my need and/or taste has changed in the meantime.

If you are patient and wait long enough, you are more likely to find the perfect something; if you are patient and wait long enough, you may also change your mind

Something I learned from this forum is to use a sample board--don't paint directly on your walls

I've started using a primed piece of drywall for sample paint colors. Move it around, place it next to furniture, look at it during different times of the day. I have two sample boards that I use (front and back) so that gives me four surfaces to try out different colors. I apply two coats.

Even if DH says he wants a sofa he can stretch out and sleep on and you buy the 92" behemoth, in reality, he will only sleep on it about once a year. (That is, if you don't count sleeping in the upright position, for which 92" is not necessary!)

If you walk away from the "almost" piece, the "exactly right" piece will present itself shortly.

If it really isn't working for you, just cut your losses and get rid of it.

Nothing is more valuable than a good upholsterer.

It's only paint.

In no particular order:

Find inspiration before trying to design on function only.

Silk Dupoini is washable.

Quality if much more important than quantity.

Antiques never lose value or interest.

Edit and update before the dust builds up.

God invented housekeepers for a reason :oP

A well designed room should hold everything necessary to function in that room (ie I don't go to the basement for canned peaches...I don't need that any peaches) :oP

Whimsey is required.

and on that same line, Add the unexpected to keep thing interesting.

Ultra hip is ultra replaceable (and will be ultra unfashionable in a couple of weeks). Classics are always a better option.

Cat hair and chenile are not friends (or they're too close of friends...something like that).

Fleece is an evil cousin of chenile when it comes to cats...

Natural materials are always a better bet than synthetic (cotton, silk, stone, wood etc).

Nothing plastic, NOTHING!

Good decor can be done in a day. Great decor evolves over time.

These are things I didn't really have to learn as I have always been this way (yes, the words are "frugal, lazy" and suddenly the now trendy "ecco aware"!)

Never buy anything that has to be dry cleaned.

Think about how you are going to keep it clean or how often it will have to be dusted/vac'd/cleaned. (Ex: black furniture, grids, curlicues, nooks and crannies.)

Think about longetivity in both your home and the enviro.

If it isn't comfortable or makes you smile it isn't worth it.

Good things do come to those who are able to wait.

Learn the difference between quality and mass produced.

Not every empty space in your room needs to be filled.

When you ask for advice... everyone has an opinion... so be prepared!

Listen to your heart and not your neighbor (or relative or co-worker) because it is your home and not theirs and you have to love and be comfortable where you live.

Great thread!!!

My lessons:
1. Keep trying until you get *exactly* the right paint color.
2. Use neutrals for the big (expensive) pieces and if you want to go trendy/stylish/wild, do it with throw pillows, vases, etc. My beige couch has had 4 completely different looks over the years.
3. Take a picture of your room -- sometimes you don't realize what's missing or "off" until you see it on camera.
4. Every room can use a little black

The best decorating lesson I learned from this forum is that its okay to go furniture shopping after margaritas. Thanks Renofan!

My favorite lesson is to live with something for at least a week before you decide to keep it or get rid of it; this, however, works for areas outside decorating as it worked for me before I decided to marry my husband.

Only get advise from those you truly trust and whose taste is similar to yours. (same goes when shopping for clothes)

Oh, here's another:

Red is a neutral. Already knew it, but Patricia confirmed it! ;-)

Live in your space before you deoorate
Keep it simple and easy to clean
Buy the best you can afford
If funds are low, wait for what you really want and don't try to substitute because it won't make you as happy.
You know you've made the right choices when you smile everyday as you enter the room.
Only buy what you love
Take all advice as a base for your vision not as a "have to".

Patience, patience, patience

I do visit the HomeGoods, Kirkland's, Hobby Lobby and the like looking for accessories and artwork and most often come out empty handed. So now I wait until I find just the right thing and then buy it.

It is ok to have empty walls until you find just the right artwork/wall decor

Own your style whatever it is and embrace it

If you really like or want to do something and it breaks a rule, who cares. If you and your family love it and enhances your home life, so be it

What a fun and inspiring thread.
Skyway: Yes, absolutely, decorate for the way you live.
Igloochic: Yes, whimsy is required;great decor evolves over time
metromom: every room can use a little black
jerseygirl: keep it simple and easy to clean; you know you've made the right choices when you smile everyday when you enter the room

These are great thoughts to live and decorate by!

Don't keep bothering a husband who isn't really interested in Decorating, with all your choices. If you do, be prepared for him to NOT like your favorite, and to love the color you had no intention of really using. Make up your own mind.

Red

My biggest learning recently: Bona hardwood floor cleaner is the best *cabinet* cleaner (for wood-finish, not painted wood) I've ever found.

Flyleft,

I have been using Bona Hardwood Cleaner for years and also use it for kitchen cabs. It's the best!

Skypathway, I was just saying if you find a bargain, buy where you are. Why pay more when it is right there? Much to my chagrin, I bought all my bathroom accoutrements (lotion dispenser, soap dish, waste can, etc), for all my bathrooms at a trendy shop, for about a $1000, only to find them later at TJMaxx at 20% of what I had paid at the upscale shop. My response is "Buyer, beware, and don't look a gift horse in the mouth."

jerseygirl, it is amazing, isn't it? Just tried it because I had it out and I didn't want to walk back to where the other cleaners were LOL...makes sense that it's such a great cleaner, since floor grime is tougher than cabinet grime. I love it when I discover excellent off-label uses :)

Well whadya know. I've used Bona for dusting furniture, and I told DH to use it to clean a Danish table we bought off CL the other day (yee haw), but he used Old English instead.

Thanks, I'll be using it for cabs next time.

sooooo ... where does one buy this wonderful bona cleaner?

Igloo, you have plastic tubs... don't lie! : D

oh yes, Red, never ask your husband's opinion unless you're down to two choices and absolutely in love with both. THEN he gets to break the tie. At least that's what works for us :)

"Igloo, you have plastic tubs... don't lie! : D"

LOL I wrote that while staring at my son's horrible plastic booster chair strapped to a lovely hand carved oak dining room chair :oP I didn't say I always followed the lesson's learned, but I do know them :oP

I HATE PLASTIC CRAP!!! Especially the baby plastic crap!!!! (And as for tubs...only for holiday storage) :oP IN THE CLOSET WHERE YOU CAN"T SEE THEM!

Oh wait...dang it, I looked around again...there's a toy chest (it's temporary) in DS's bedroom...plastic tub! And my sewing room....e gads inside that closet is probably 40 plastic tubs (small and large) each one holding a project I haven't finished or fabric for a project I haven't started, or faric for a project I will never do but dang it was nice fabric.

Which reminds me....rule number 400! Quit buying fabric!!! (I have to go now, there's a sale at the local upholstry store...) heh heh

Phyl345
I buy Bona at a local HW flooring store called Dan Higgins. They sell small bottles of concentrate that needs to be mixed with water for a fraction of the price of already mixed. I pay about $3.50 for the concentrate. I have seen it at RH. Maybe you can check out some of the HW flooring places near you. I did a google search. Looks like it may be cheaper to buy already mixed from Amazon for you.

Here is a link that might be useful: Bona Hardwood Cleaner

What wonderful advice! Thank you all for sharing your experiences. I'm tempted to give Bona a try, even though I've sworn not to get any new "miracle" cleaning supplies - it sounds like the real thing.

I can only agree with what so many of you have said - patience (or procastination) definitely pay off.

Is it better than Murphy's Oil Soap? I love me some Murphy's.

postum, it's not a new miracle cleaner--it's a long-available floor cleaner from the folks who make the best floor finishes in the world (e.g. Bona Kemi Traffic, what we have on our white oak). I found out about it only because of researching for the finish, but turns out it's great at cleaning wood in general, too, even the wood cabinets that DH and DD (not I :)) open with wet/dirty hands and get drips all over. Made them look brand new :)

chicory, I don't know about Murphy's -- I remember using it a long time ago but then I read something negative about it and switched...can't remember what that was, unfortunately. With fibro brain you have to prioritize your knowledge and after I've made a decision I find that I delete the relevant information from my mental hard drive :)

Murphy's can gunk up the finish on wood.
I get Bona products at my local Ace as well as Do It Best Hardware stores. ;) Have been using the cleaners for about a year but at Christmas got a good deal on the kit. Got the Fluffy White Static Mop Collector Of All Things Furry And Dusty and it's great! Then I spritz cleaner on the cleaning mop head and wipe. Voila! Clean n shiny ;D

I've learned that when it comes time for new furniture, buy all the pieces at once. I know patience is often key, but not if you want matching furniture! Don't buy the bed thinking you can go back and buy the matching dresser or nightstands at a later date. By the time you get back to the furniture store, it will be discontinued! Then you are left to buy plain, simple pieces just because the wood matches.

My lesson is old but valid: MEASURE!!!

Especially with the trend in furniture to not only very large scale pieces but to furniture stores that are also huge, with enormously high ceilings...the scale of what you see when you shop may be far different than what will actually fit and look nice in your home.

And measuring should be on a 3-d basis; just because the footprint fits on the floor doesn't mean that something bulky is going to actually look or function right in the space. I think it was mari who recommended using boxes if need be, but she is right. That really helps give a true feel for what the piece will be like once it's home and you either can't return it or face an exorbitant restocking fee. Ask me how I know...

Ann

redbazel: With you there! Especially if your husband is color blind!
And never let your husband take you on an important decision-making mission if you're suffering with pain and require medication! Good Lord, I would have agreed to a watermelon screwed into our outdoor light socket! I just wanted to get home to my pain killers and settle into bed with my absethed tooth. Now when I see that Hansel and Gretel-looking light fixture I agreed to, I wonder, "why oh why wasn't I stronger!"

The biggest lesson I have learned is that if you have little money but high expectations, patience is necessary. Most decisions made just because you (in my case dh) feel the need to fill the space or just accomplish something turn out to be wrong. Just don't buy anything in those situations because then you must war against the frugal person inside that tells you not to replace the lamp in the living room that is in good working order but is unattractive.

For those waxing eloquent about the Bona hardwood floor cleaner, I have a question. After using it if somebody walks across bare foot, are there footprints? Thank you.

Don't steal your SIL's paint colors. They won't go in YOUR house.

Don't buy furniture because "it's a good buy" or "it looks like grown-up furniture". Only buy it it if you love it.

You can find some interesting things if you curb shop. :-)

I'm probably reiterating other people's lessons, but what the hey.

* Don't do anything because someone else told you to, unless you like it for itself. Doesn't matter whether it's your mother, some magazine, one of us ;-) or some highfalutin' $500-an-hour designer with a long string of letters after her name. You're the one who's going to have to live with it, they're not.

* Avoid chasing trends unless you throwing money away when the styles inevitably change doesn't bother you. (Teal and peach Southwestern-style couches anyone?) If you are never IN style, you will never be OUT of style.

* Shoehorning an over-the-top completely inappropriate style into an incompatibly styled structure can look plain weird. You have to do it carefully and it's best if you're starting with a house that's very bland, a completely blank slate, rather than one that has a distinct style of its own. (I cringe when I see Queen Annes or Craftsman bungalows decorated with ultramodern stuff.)

* Learn to listen to the house. Most houses have their own personalities! Subsequent houses are easier to listen to than your first, because you've already got the hang of it.

* I do disagree with the assertions of "never settle for 'good enough' when perfect is out there somewhere". Sometimes "inoffensive and gets the job done" IS all something needs to be. Not everything in a room needs to be a movie star, some things need to be supporting actors, extras, and even crew (to stretch the analogy to its limits). I have an old painted pine dresser in my bedroom that I don't adore, but it keeps my clothes off the floor, and it's not UNpleasant to look at. I don't really see any point in driving myself frantic looking (and spending more money for) for the absolute most perfect dresser possible when there are much more important things to make myself crazy over. :-)

* However, don't saddle yourself with something you really, really don't like (as opposed to being "okay with") just because it is cheap or free, unless you have no other option. Same goes for inheritances and handmedowns - if they make you actively unhappy, unload them. Your memories are in your heart, not in the stuff, so pass them on to someone else who will love them. If your family lays a guilt trip you about selling or giving away Great-Aunt Gertrude's china cabinet, but none of them will take it, stand your ground. If it means that much to them, they can kick in on the cost of a temperature-controlled storage locker - but I'll bet you dollars to doughnuts they won't cough up. See #1.

* Don't steamroller the other inhabitants of the house, because they have to live there too. Your husband may not really care about the specific details of decorating but he may well care quite a bit about being surrounded with masses of flowers and lace and nineteen pillows on every piece of furniture and not a comfortable, snoozable chair to be found, even if it thrills you. If asking the other person what they LIKE doesn't net you any help, try asking what they DON'T like. I usually whittle it down to three options and present them to DH, who almost invariably makes an excellent choice, but if I give him twenty choices he gets overloaded and grumpy.

I get Bona hardwood floor cleaner at Ace Hardware. No footprints, tishtoshnm, although I've only ever had matte or satin finish floors - high gloss finishes are more prone to smudging, so you might get footprints from bare feet. BTW, they also make a cleaner for non-wood flooring, including laminate.

Murphy's is best for old varnished and oiled finishes, but it doesn't play well with modern polyurethanes and lacquers. Using Murphy's can even void the warranty on some prefinished wood products. (Don't use a spray polish like Pledge on any piece of furniture you may ever want to refinish - the silicones in it can get down into the wood through microscopic fissures in the finish and prevent a good refinishing job later.)

There are some great pearls of wisdom here! I think some of them will find their way to that little notebook to be carried w/ me to stores when I go! You know, just to keep me on track!