Making life easier with an elderly cat
Mayo510
11 years ago
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annzgw
11 years agoMayo510
11 years agoRelated Discussions
9 Great Rules for Caring for Your Elderly Parent at Home
Comments (7)FallDownGoBump... I hear ya... Loud and clear... Sounds as if we're both in the same boat... Hubby has 3 sisters and 2 brothers left and not one of them even bothered to send a card or call on his birthday, let alone any other time. Even if I did ask for help not one of them would... But the real kicker is that hubby has helped EVERYONE in his family and everyone has screwed him in some way... Six of his nine siblings and his father has lived with us at one time or another... When we first married we took in his father and youngest sister with the stipulation that 4 of the other brothers and sisters chip in a lousy $7. a week... The first week we got $21. the next week we got $14. then not another cent or even a crust of bread... I could go on for hours about them but I won't... It only upsets me more... My story: Three years ago hubby broke his hip and two days after the surgery they sent him home with me with no additional help... Three days after that something happened and he didn't know who he was, where he was or who I was... After a two week stay in the hospital, so they could perform every test known to man, they told me he had 2 strokes and a little stiff from the partial hip replacement but otherwise he was in good health and they sent him to a rehab facility ( nursing home )... BTW, while he was there, recovering, his youngest sister got it in her head that since the nursing home offered hospice services that was all they did and turned around and told hubby that's why he was there! Sorry for getting off on another rant... Anyway, after two months the rehab facility sent him home... For about a month and a half the visiting nurse and a physical therapist came over twice a week... By then I had to find a doctor because hubby's meds were running out. After reviewing all his medical records the doctor says hubby had SEVERAL strokes and a heart attack!!!! Ok, sorry, that's yet another rant... Right now I have a 67 year old hubby who moves as if he's 100 and, at times, has the brain of a 2 year old... Hugs, Rita...See MoreThe simple things in life ... what makes you happy?
Comments (26)Natal we had a lovely day today and I was wandering around the garden thinking about how much I was going to enjoy taking the flowers in during the spring and summer. It's a new yard to us, and honestly more than I can handle, but for one summer I'm going to live like the fancy people and have fresh flowers all over the house every day :) It's been pretty mild here and the yard is full of lovely evergreens and several types of wonderful rosemary. Such deep lush scents. I've started doing little winter floral arrangements with the herbs and evergreens. All for free :) Then I just sneek in simple stuff like babys breath or a few flowers from the store among the beautiful herbs. I love fresh flowers and this silly house seems to ask for them so I'm having a great deal of fun being creative. So that's my personal little pleasure lately, but on a regular basis I thank god for every morning my son gets up healthy and goes to bed the same. It's been such a long road for him. Seeing his life become "normal" since we've moved is heaven. he's blossomed so much, and now he gets to go to school with other "normal" kids :) He's so happy about it and wants to go every day, morning and night heh heh And watching him run to the gate with his silly little thomas lunch box, full of food he will never eat (he's had the same snacks in it for two weeks and does not eat them, but wanted a lunch box like the other big kids), his happiness makes me smile. He's sick today for the first time this winter. It's a simple pleasure, but we really enjoyed the little vacation from illness. My kitty just told me to mention how much I love his purr....we've been together (kitty and I) since before DH and DS and when he crawls into bed and tries to sleep on my head, it reminds me of simpler times, which also makes me smile :)...See MoreGetting Elderly Drivers Off The Road, Part Deux
Comments (38)rosemaryt, you have a tough situation and my heart goes out to you. Best wishes in a successful resolution to the problem. This is a very frustrating thread to read. People screaming for you to go commit a felony makes me just shake my head in disbelief. Laws vary from state to state so when you get "armchair lawyers", including myself, giving you advice, take it for ideas only since your situation will vary. A few things do come to mind though. First, the police are sympathetic and in fact, that's good for the public as a whole but doesn't help for this situation. Now you need a "hot dog" cop, but the problem is to find one. There are other options though, again however it varies in different jurisdictions. One is a "citizen complaint", "criminal complaint" or citizen's arrest. You need guidance to do this properly and if appropriate but seems to me that it could in this case. I'd doubt very highly you'd get him committed for evaluation with the adverse positions of the doctor and social worker. However if he is truly senile, and it's documented, then a guardianship is a definite possibility. But an involuntary guardianship is not easy, and rightly so. But you might be able to propose a temporary guardianship, a conservatorship or something to get a start. This won't be quick most likely, but is an option to consider. In MN, starting a guardianship proceeding would be more likely to get an eval ordered. Again, your state will vary. I hope you're paying no attention to the fools who suggest that you will be financially responsible for his actions. Good grief where do people get these ideas? That's stupid, plain and simple. C'mon folks, she needs help, support and ideas, not ridiculous ramblings. I suppose someone will running offended and I'll get a friendly reminder but so be it. It needed to be said. Likewise that you'll force a cop to do something, that you can sue the cops if something happens down the road and well, it's a highly emotional situation and obviously many people aren't thinking clearly. People watch too much "Boston Legal" or something and want to threaten to sue for anything thinking that people will cringe and fold. It may work with someone who doesn't know better, but threatening people that know better doesn't do anything more than make the person making the threat look like a complete idiot. Don't get caught up in that. It won't work. Also, I agree you should keep the insurance on the vehicle. I'd even go so far as to make sure the vehicles are, in fact insured. You insure the vehicle primarily so if in fact he has no valid license likely won't affect the insurance at least until he gets into an accident or ticket, at which time the company likely would cancel the coverage. Newspapers, TV, radio, media as a whole... well, this isn't a huge story in news terms but someone might be interested. But I think I'd pursue it with low expectations. Disabling the car hasn't worked. So you need a different plan of attack. Take a deep breath and try to relax. I know it's easier said than done though. Obviously you can't be following him around all over, first because you don't have the time and secondly you could be guilty of stalking if he is angry enough to push it, which he may well be. But a private security firm or private investigator is able to, but of course that will cost something. They can gather evidence, video his operation and even be able to make a complaint, though I'm not sure that many would want to get that involved. I could contact my former PI firm and see if they have any suggestions but since the laws vary, I think you'd be better off to seek some guidance locally. Most good places won't charge you to talk to you about the case and give you some ideas. Again, my best to you and yours. If I think of anything else I'll post again. I know what a tough situation it is. And my experience wasn't quite as drastic as yours, though my dad should have quit driving 20 years earlier. But that's a whole different story....See MoreThings to Do For Elderly Parents When You Visit for the Holidays
Comments (16)I think others covered a lot but you say" over Christmas" so are there beds to be made up, linens to be washed, bathroom to be spruced up, fridge needing to be cleaned out, especially of outdated bottles & food in containers. Cooking for elderly doesn't have to be difficult. I often buy a couple of yams & cook in microwave(wash & poke skin with fork in several places so doesn't explode) when done cool yams & cut in serving size pieces (I remove skin but some like it) & put in sandwich bags(kind that just fold over & put in Ziploc bag & label with date & what is in the bag. I store, yams, green beans, squash, bread stuffing, etc & I never thaw anything out. I make soups & put in small round margarine tubs each holds 1 cup (So leave a little space so doesn't boil over when you make them up)so take lid off to side(so just partly covered) & reheat about 3 1/2 minutes. Chili same way, yams couple of slices about 1 minute(microwaves vary) just add butter to serve. I make a meatloaf in a 9x5 loaf pan & freeze slices in amount I think I will eat in sandwich bags & then in Ziploc bag & can have hot meatloaf sandwich in 1 minute or meatloaf, yams, green beans in about 3 minutes. it's very easy to eat well. Leftover steak from eating out, bring it home & pkg it in sandwich bags & in Ziploc bag for 1 or2 meals in few days. Couldn't eat that big baked potato, cut it in sizes you will eat at 1 time & slip in sandwich bags, zip loc bag& freeze, I simply fold over the sandwich bags or twist & fold over before putting in freezer Ziploc bags. Can use cheaper Zip loc type bags or wash & reuse, throw out the sandwich bags after food is heated. Use Sharpie pen to label Zip loc bags & use up foods in couple of months to 6 months. Spaghetti mixed with sauce & meat, macaroni, casseroles, scalloped potatoes & ham, all freeze great in single serving sandwich bags & reheat in microwave in about 3-4 minutes at most. I did this for my folks for years. If you can't cook & like something like hamburger helper made it up & freeze. I cook chicken breasts & use half of them for sandwiches & rest becomes chicken soup, so make ways to make it, with noodles, rice, cook bag of mixed veggies up in microwave & add whole thing including water you cooked veggies in &add seasonings, can add low sodium tomatoes from can of tomato sauce, mushrooms from can or barley etc. Lots of choices. Anyway hope you are well armed with ideas to make things go smoother. Merry Christmas to All!...See Morequasifish
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