Well, my UPS coworkers have told me that I will never look forward to Christmas again. As long as I work there, it will signify getting up as early as 2:30 am and wondering WHEN the seemingly endless flow of boxes will stop and feeling physically exhausted not only from the disrupted sleep schedule but also the 6-7 hours of weightlifting and cardio. After Christmas, it will like I am on vacation. LOL I haven't crawled up into the attic yet to get the big tree, but I did put out some ceramic Christmas things and unfold two gawdy tinsel trees, one teal and the other fuschia for DS to play with and enjoy. I shop throughout the year so Christmas shopping isn't really a big stresser for me. Lucky for me, my aunt just recently earned her massage therapy cert. and we are swapping massage for garden/yard work. I had my third appt. yesterday and I feel more exhausted after I see her than after work. She decided to study for massage therapy after she started going for her Fibromyalgia. I hear many nurses (she is a nurse also) suffer from this condition. Anyhoo, I am still plugging along.

And very appropriae to day because it's still raining here this morning. We've gotten almost 3" yesterday so it was a big slosh in my wellies this morning when I took the dog out for his walk. And Pidge, my take the December 26th sales is the same as the shopping frenzy on Thanksgiving weekend: Just say no. Merry Christmas everybody!

Unless it's been a really wonderful day, I age as the hours go by. I wake up feeling 25 (those squeaky, creaky joints don't belong to me); quickly maturing to a responsible 45 at the office; on the way home I progress to a weary 65 wishful of retirement; and keep aging until I dodder off to bed, often feeling that I'm within sight of the century mark. Most of the time my mind is young enough to enjoy life, but the body has gone fast-forward into a rocking chair.

I swore to myself yesterday that I'd evoke all the power of positive thinking I could muster and this week would be GOOD. I NEED a good week. I DESERVE a good week. I overslept this morning. No big deal in light of last week when nothing went right. Work was a disaster every single day. My Christmas vacation was canceled and I was told I will have to work every single day straight until the 22nd. I barely made it out at night in time for DS's basketball games. Thursday night, I left 10 minutes late and assured him I'd ONLY be 10 minutes late. And I would have only been 8 minutes late if it wasn't for the fact that some idiot ran a red light at 50 mph and creamed me in the middle of a busy intersection and then left. As I was talking to the 911 dispatcher, he came back...he had to drop his buddy's girlfriend off at the mall. I'm afraid to take the truck in for an estimate for fear they'll total it, I LOVE that truck, even if it does legally belong to the XDH. When I finally got the XDH to answer the phone, he gave me a blow-by-blow play of the game as it happened while I dealt with the other driver and the cops. I made it to the game in time to watch the team score the winning basket. As I left the game, I ran out of gas in front of the gas station. Lucky for me, there was a Sheriff Deputy standing by to give me a ticket for driving an "unsafe" vehicle. After explaining what happened (ok, after getting irrate and then explaining what happened...), he let me go with a "you're lucky, this time" warning. On those words, I bought a lottery ticket and went home. Haven't checked the ticket yet, but no one won the big one so no hurry. Friday and Saturday were bitterly cold and I got to work in a building with no heat. One of my employees took pity on me and built me a cardboard igloo and equipped it with a space heater. I'll probably catch on fire in it, but when it was 25 degrees inside, I didn't much care. Saturday morning, a Lieutenant Colonel I befriended a few months ago drove 22 miles to bring me a hot cup of coffee. And I wonder why I do this job? He's getting ready to spend a year in Iraq but still takes time to think of a lowly civil servant. As he got ready to leave, he told me "Maryanne, the one thing that makes you different from anyone else is that you found your calling..." Maybe. Maybe not. Saturday night when I got home from work, all I wanted was a bowl of soup and to curl up on the sofa. The house was a little chilled so I turned up the heat a bit, heated up some soup, threw on my pj's and curled up under my security blanket. Woke up about 2 am freezing to death. Went to turn up the heat...nothing. I had no heat. Not much one can do at 2 am except throw on more clothing and crawl into bed. Thank goodness for down duvet's! Woke up around 8 am Sunday and decided that I wasn't going in to work until the heat was repaired. Tossed a load of laundry in, made some coffee, took a shower (Note: Do not use a hot shower as a means to thaw out if you have no heat. It's twice as cold when you exit the shower!), hung the laundry on the line and started another load. After getting dressed, I called the repair guy and left a message. As I went to get the second load out of the washer, I was greeted with a flooded laundry room. The motor pump decided it was a good time to go out and all that soapy water went all over the floor. It was at this point I sat down and laughed. And laughed. And laughed. When I regained some control, I called the XDH and pleaded for help. He was going to pick up DS from a camping trip with the scouts so we switched...he came and bailed and mopped, I went (in his heated van!) to pick up DS. Of course, DS was an hour late in arriving back. By the time I got home, my dryer was sitting in the driveway and the XDH had his head under the washer. It was then I mentioned that I had no heat either...he wondered why it was so cold but thought maybe I was really turning into an "ice queen". Twit. After condemning the washer motor, he went to work on the heat pump. Seems a bug crawled across the circuits and fried them. And himself. It was 3 pm by the time he found some new fuses and got the system working. We were all starved so I took them out to dinner. It was the least I could do. So, now I have heat but no washing machine or dryer. The Volvo broke down again 2 weeks ago and now the truck is a mess (since the bed of the truck is slightly off kilter, I get to "crab walk" down the highway at 60 mph!). I haven't even begun to do any Christmas shopping, but I did drag DS out to the tree lot last night and told him that come hell or high water, I was going to have a Christmas tree! So we picked out a nice one, drug it home and put the lights on...nothing else. DS will spend Christmas with his father this year. I'll spend Christmas with my head under the covers, shifting position only to refill my mimosa glass. You don't honestly think I'm going to touch the stove, do you? Oh, and I have an $1800 property tax bill due in 2 weeks. Ho Ho Ho. DS said to me last night "Mom, I've been thinking about the Army..." Sweet Mother of God! I held my breath while waiting to hear what he was thinking. "I was wondering...if I joined the Army, would I get to spend more time with you? Or would they deploy me? And if they deployed me, would you deploy with me?" I wasn't sure if that sound I heard was my heart breaking or if my blood pressure spiked and I ruptured a blood vessel, but I did my best to explain to this child that while the Army is an honorable career, I wanted him to go to college and follow his dream of becoming a vet. I apologized for not being able to spend more time with him and promised him I'd work hard to fix this, but sometimes we must make sacrifices for others and that sacrifices such as this are always rewarded in the end. And, of course I'd deploy with him if he deployed! But, we still have 5 more years to figure this out. A lot has changed in the past 5 years, a lot will change in the next 5 years. Especially me. Starting today. I WILL have a good week, even if I oversleep in the morning. At least I left work at a reasonable hour, picked up my child and cooked dinner for him. I got him to scouts, made sure his homework was done, helped him study for mid-terms, and baked brownies for his band party. So what if we're the only house with a dryer in the driveway and a mountain of laundry piled up. So what if the car is broken and the truck is off kilter. Who cares if Christmas will be slim and I have to call the tax assessor and ask for an extention. It will all change. We have each other and nothing can be better. Yeah, it's going to be a GOOD week. Maryanne