Yes, indeed. My daughter uses this on me all of the time. It makes me see red. That's when I use on her a truism that my
mother taught me years ago. We make time for those things that are important to us.

Yes, she is always too busy unless it's something she wants to do. Now that she is retired, I thought maybe she'd not have that excuse...........I was wrong.

Shirley

Please don't get all upset over this phrase.

This is just a way to politely say that whatever you desire is simply not a priority to them. Everyone has 24 hours in the day and has to decide how to use them.

Oh yes, I have a friend that does this all the time and then goes on and on about ALL she does...But, what's funny, she puts herself in this position by having her nose (volunteering) in everything....She's really no busier than anyone else but thinks she is....

I also say, "aren't we all", and leave it at that.....

People use it for me. They say I am being hard on myself because I admit - I'm too lazy to...... (whatever it is) and they tell me I'm too busy because of ......(whatever it is). I'm right in this one;). Not today though - finally getting that basement painted. Breaks over! Back to work. Oh, I also add and too unorganized to get my "business" together to do effectively.

Some people use that phrase as a badge of honour - see how important I am cause I'm so busy.

Some people use that phrase as a badge of honour - see how important I am cause I'm so busy.

Bingo!

If they aren't interested, they should say, that really doesn't interest me in a way that is kind and firm. Not lie or give a flimsy excuse that is easily seen through, since it may be taken as blfenton (and I) sees it. I think it is can be an insulting excuse.

Or, how about "I don't have time". Says the same thing to me, how important I am!,

I agree that I typically see it as an attempt for someone to say they aren't interested in the activity without being rude. If someone wants to do something, they will make time, period.

If friends of mine are always too busy to do something with me, I reconsider the friendship.

What annoys me is people with children claiming they are so much more busy than those without. I get that kids are a lot of work but typically single people have obligations as well. I see it a lot in corporate culture where parents have a lot more flexibility and those without families are supposed to be happy to cover overtime or weekends since they have nothing better to do. And leaving at 4 pm to make a child's activity is considered to be good family values while a single person leaving at 4 pm to go to happy hour with a friend is excessive and selfish.

Or SAHM's who claim their jobs are so much harder than people who have to work, and that they should be making over $100k a year because they are really a nurse, teacher, cook, house keeper, manager, etc. all in one. Which is insulting to those who have gone through the training and experience to actually be one of these... And to be clear, I do want to be a SAHM someday but I certainly don't think it will be easier or harder than what someone else does. First of all, how would I know? And secondly, it's considered the ultimate luxury to be able to do what I want with my life and I'm grateful for that every single day.

The competition to who has the hardest life drives me nuts. Everyone is different, with different strengths/weaknesses and priorities. And in reality, most people in our social circles and community have pretty blessed lives anyway compared to most of the world.

Too many people ACT busy, while others get things done. I like the old statement: Don't confuse activity with accomplishment.

This is a pet peeve of my sister and me. We even have a refrain,

"Busy, busy, crazy busy,
Just no time
I'm busy, busy!"

And I agree that people wear it as a badge of honor.

Hum... I'm not sure about this. It also depends on how the other person interpret it.

Many times, my family or friend called me and I couldn't answer the phone right away. I was truly busy at the time such as my hands were wet from washing dishes or I was in the bathroom, or whatever I was doing, I could not reach the phone to answer it. That's what the answering service is there for.

What was their conclusion? ... That I'm always busy and don't have time to answer their calls. I mean really, just because I have a cellular phone beside me, there are time that we can't simply answer the phone. Not to mention, when we're at certain location where cellular phones are not allowed or must be turned off.

So, stating that "I was busy", simply can mean just that or "please be patient, I'll get to you as soon as I'm free from whatever I'm doing". Sometime, I also say it so, I wouldn't have to explain/whine about my illness or why I wasn't feeling well enough to talk or whatever.

When someone's telling me that s/he has been busy, I trust the person and his/her reply and take it as is. So, why analyzing it or letting it bug me.

If someone answers to me "aren't we all", I will reply back: "exactly, I'm glad you understand".

This post was edited by ntt_hou on Tue, Mar 25, 14 at 19:48

I think a lot of people are too busy because their jobs demand so much. It is not unusual for my sons or SIL to have to work weekends or through the night and into the next day too. With the economy crunch, employers are asking more from their employees and trying to get it done with fewer employees. People are glad to have the job and understand the need to do more with fewer staff, and so they really are too busy for lots of things.

I have to admit I am one of those who use the phrase to get out of things I really don't want to do. I'm not really that busy. I guess I feel I'm being polite.

I admit, I say this.While I make time for the things I want to do, I can say I'm busy doing stuff a lot. I think I learned to say this because some people will just not take no for an answer. So, its easier to say I'm busy. They seem to accept this answer.

Like some others here I think it may be thought of as a polite way of saying "no".....

I detest the word busy! However, a mom with a few kids, whether a stay at home or working mom, is ALWAYS "busy"

scissors, I don't run into that many people who won't take no for an answer. It may be easier for you, but that probably doesn't make it right? At least consider the possibility? If it is someone whose friendship you value, reconsider it. If you don't value their friendship, why worry about what they think? But if it is at work where you say this, really reconsider, as it may sound to your coworkers that you don't think they're busy.

I don't read too much into the phrase. To me it's like saying "you never call" when it is just as easy for that person to pick up the phone. I find the "busy" people often have conflicting schedules. Their available time isn't the same as mine. I'm a SAHM. I have a few day time hours each week when things are less hectic. My schedule is not the same as a working mom's. You will rarely see me actively participating in something outside the home at 7pm because that is my family time. For the working parents, 7 pm is a time when they want to schedule activities. It disrupts my schedule of spending time with my family so I am busy.

I try not to use the "I'm busy" to often. I think it makes my friends feel like they aren't important. I tend to say a certain week or month, lets catch up or do someones birthday. Lately I have felt overwhelmed and I hate it. It's graduation & party crunch time, scholarship assisting, school activities have simmered down thank goodness, but the farming has stepped up X5. Oh and we are adding a whole new wing to our house. DH is doing most of the work between farming and I'm the designer. HA, sounds glamorous but it seriously isn't! Subbing at school has been few and the caller must be frustrated at my refusal to work. I am blessed to be able to enjoy the fruits of our labor but its been a long haul, we don't know what weekend fun is. My friends have been so good, they will offer their hands to help me. You bet I'm using them at DD's graduation open house! that's what friends are for. ~~I agree we are all busy. But if my friends NEED me I'll try to be there for them someway, like they are for me.

Toni_ne, you're right. Of course, if an otherwise thoughtful friend is busy with something specific, as in, "I'm going nuts with a project at work that's due in six weeks. How about if we get together after that?" that's not a problem.

ditto what you said joann, that is a great way to qualify saying I am just so busy [right now]. I like it!

Hmmm. I don't get it..
We are all busy, or unavailable at different times or for different reasons.

I usually say I can not commit because.... I don't say "I'm busy" and drop the conversation.
But if someone does, that is their perogative. I don't get upset about it.

But truely, why do you have to explain yourself?

Sometimes it easier to just say I was busy, then to list off the 10-20 things you accomplished and the 10-20 you couldn't get to because the first group ate up to much time.

I don't 'get it' either. If someone is 'busy' I usually say how wonderful that you are out and about....keeping busy!

Busy could mean any number of things... taking a needed nap, trying a new recipe, reading a book. Maybe it is a polite way of saying I have other things on my mind and don't feel the need to explain. I am not busy most of the time, but my anemia makes me tired a lot of the time. I wonder if 'tired " would work, politely.

I suspect that someone who is always "too busy to ....." and who never later initiates a proposal for something else is sending a message that has nothing to do with being busy.

These are tea leaves that are easy to read.