TTC in 6 months.. what to do right Now?

malachite

I posted this in the Preg forum, someone suggested I come here :o)

Hi all! I'm very excited, hubby actually started to take interest in the idea of having a baby (or at least he can say it out loud now :o). I didnt even have to talk him into it! We want to TTC in 6 months :o)Â

We are both 25; June is our 1-year wedding anniversary (we have been together for the better part of 10 years); hubby has a pretty good job and we have had our house for two and a half years and are pretty much all settled in AND We have been SAVE SAVE SAVING our $$$.

We are ready!

What kind of things can we start on now? So we wont be going nuts when we do finally do conceive?

I know there is a chance that it could take a while and all that, but we want to start getting the expensive things so we donÂt have drop the cash all at one time (I wont be going back to work for a while) and because I may not have the energy to do it when IÂm finally pregnant. Some people say that itÂs a bad omen and all that, but I donÂt know, I think it's smart. What do you think? I just canÂt see myself shopping, painting and all that, when IÂm 8 months along.

When did you start doing things to get yer life in order for a baby, what have you done and ***what do you wish you has gotten done earlier***?

HOW DID YOU PREPARE?

. Such as...

Started a home based business

Sold yer car

Bought or Sold a house

Got new carpet

Took that vacation

Remodeled the kitchen

Started a baby savings account

Started working 2nd job

Bought yer baby furniture

Started on the nursery

Starting buying toys and clothes

Enrolled in daycare

We do want to remodel the kitchen before we have a baby (itÂs been planned for a while), because I wont be going back to work for at least a year and we are probably going to be living moderately for a while. I am also going to sell my mustang and go for the more conservative priced family car.

How do you ever prepare enough?! Plan enough?!

Any info on what we can and should do now, would be VERY helpful.

Michelle

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Carlotta_Bull

I was 32 when I got pregnant & 33 when I had my daughter.

I didn't buy my baby furniture until I was 7 months. I bought a cradle and a crib (many of my friends had bassinets with wheels on them). I was conservative with my nursery decorations - I didn't see the point in spending a lot of $$ for something that didn't matter to the baby. She slept in a cradle at the foot of our bed for 4 months because I wanted her close by.

I had 2 baby showers, so I needed to buy very little in the way of immediate supplies & clothes for the baby. I didn't buy clothes for a year.

Don't worry about getting everything done. About 2-3 weeks before you deliver, you have a period of time where you have TONS of energy & can get things pulled together. It's called "the nesting instinct" & it's how nature makes sure the mother has things ready for the new arrival.

I suggest you just sock away your money. Wait until "it happens" before you do anything you wouldn't be doing anyway.

Good Luck!

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mom4boys

Michelle, that's wonderful that you're planning such a prepared nest for your little one to be. Below, as a mom of four who will be turning 40 this year, I will give you my humble advice on each of your questions. However, what does raise a red flag with me is that your hubby is only just recently able to say "baby" out loud now. Be careful. No matter how well you plan, a baby turns your world upside down--and unless your husband is having this baby because HE wants this baby--not because you talked him into it--you will have a very rough road ahead. Say goodbye to a good night's sleep, intimacy and privacy whenever you want it,dinner out when the whim strikes you, and later a sulky teen who thinks you've ruined his life, etc. That's not to say having a child isn't awesome, and there are plenty of joyous moments too, but make sure your husband is doing this because HE is thrilled, and I do mean THRILLED, with the idea. Otherwise, put it off for another few years. You're only 25 after all. But, since you are wise enough to ask, here's some answers fro someone who wishes she had been as wise as you at your age.

Started a home based business--go for it. It is the absolute best way to avoid daycare and be there for your kids. Although once they get to the crawling stage, you may need some hired help.
Sold yer car--do not sell your car. You will need it when you suddenly discover your child needs diapers, formula, baby food, medicine at 4:00 am.
Bought or Sold a house--not necessary. If anything, move into a townhouse. There tend to be lots of kids in townhouse complexes for your kids to play with.
Got new carpet--ha ha ha ha. FORGET IT! Also do not buy a new couch or any white or light coloured clothing. Don't mean to sound gross but all will be spit up on, spilled on, peed on, pooped on, puked on and jumped on during the next five years.
Took that vacation. Do it now or never. Also dine out. For the next several years the only restaurants you will visit will have ballrooms--that's the rooms with balls, not dancing rooms.
Remodeled the kitchen--no harm in it. Make sure you have a dishwasher and a microwave.
Started a baby savings account--nice idea--make it for college.
Started working 2nd job--bad idea after the baby is born. The baby wants its parents, not money.
Bought yer baby furniture--wait til your 7 months pregnant, and then buy it second-hand or cheap stuff. Babies grow out of the stuff so fast there's no point spending big money on it. But make sure it's SAFE. Babyproof your house--get a book from your doctor or the library on how to do this.
Started on the nursery--same as above
Starting buying toys and clothes --wait til your seven months pregnant
Enrolled in daycare--start planning now on how you'll keep your child OUT of daycare until he or she is at least school age. Some parents have no choice about daycare, but almost every family would have a parent stay home with a child if they could. You or your husband are the best people to raise and care for your child. That may mean waiting a few years until your husband has a great job instead of a "preety good" job. Being with their parents is what babies want, so don't deny your child this basic yearning if you can help it.

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Lynn_upnorth

Big step- congrats on thinking ahead. My advice would be to start saving the income of whichever person will be staying home NOW and seeing how it is to live on one income. If you can do this while you're working, with the extra expenses involved, you'll be doing well.

Don't buy ANYTHING for the baby until you're pregnant. You don't want to have to look at it if for some reason you can't conceive.

Take your vitamins with folic acid, and a vacation. Don't buy anything new for the house, although if you're going to remodel the kitchen anyway, that might be a good thing to get out of the way. Remodeling tends to cause disagreements, and pregnancy causes flucuating emotions, with occasional gusts of irrationality- not the best combination... Good Luck- Lynn

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Bugs

I work for a financial advisor and the best thing to do is start saving and buy as needed. Start the home based business. A house is a good investment because you are paying to own it not paying someone elses mortagage but put away any money you can and try to earn interest. that way you have money for repairs, remodel when some money is saved dont do anything on credit unless you have too. Start trying to save some for education and if your child doesnt use it then you can use it elsewhere. Always try to have a vacation because someday you will say I wish I did. The key point is save first then spend. Set a goal for each thing you want to do first and if the vacation is only a 2 hour drive to a cottage it is still worth it. Clothes and toys, get what you need, many friends pass things down around here, kids dont wear things very long before they grow out of them so they are practically new. Too many toys kids dont play with anyways. My step-son has gifts still not out of the package from last Christmas let alone this years.

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trekaren

Some non-household-related tips - speaking in hindsight.

1) Go ahead and kick caffeine now. I had heard of morning sickness but no one ever told me about the fatigue. And if you wait until you are pregnant to kick it, you'll be miserable.

2) start on prenatal vitamins. Studies show that one of the B-vitamin complexes in prenatals lessens or prevents morning sickness. I did this, and didn't throw up once. (in addition to the healthful benefits of folic acid, calcium, etc)

3) Go to the movies a lot. Hard to do after baby comes! :-)

4) Right before you start TTC, go to the dentist and have a full checkup. I didn't ever 'get around to it', and after the pregnancy had to have a root canal. Pregnancy leeches a lot of calcium out of the teeth.

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ChrisAK

CONGRATULATIONS: Not a parent anymore, however, a pet lover. If you plan on having pets or have (esp dogs), start introducing them slowly into the baby's room. Let them get used to the smells, toys etc. If you have one that is a mommies baby, let them lay on your lap and hear the baby grow and reassure them they are welcomed. Once the baby comes, let your spouse bring home the birthing blanket, so the dog can prepare for the newborn.

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landmarker

take the vacation

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malachite

Thank you so much for all of the valuable information! I love hearing all of your advice :o) Michelle

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Mrs_H

How about getting in shape? I'm asking this because we're considering TTC and I"m rather flabby now!!...I know I'm just going to gain weight with a pregnancy, but does being in shape really help delivery? My DH thinks I should lose some weight beforehand (I'm not grossly overweight) but he thinks it could help. Just curious.

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trekaren

Do flexibility exercises for sure. And a lot of women swear by Kegels. Other than that, walking is the best. I wish I had walked more in preparation for mine.

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Mhousework

I'm just agreeing with the other posters:

Don't buy ANY new furniture and certainly not new carpet. If you have garage sale furniture, you won't cringe when the kids climb on them. I'd stay away from glass tops and those with sharp edges.

Take prenatal vitamins now. They are a great multi-vitamin and even some men take them because they are so complete.

Eat healthy! Go to movies. Go out to dinner. Remodel your kitchen.

Don't buy baby stuff until you're pregnant. Many things, car seats for instance, improve year by year. You can, however do a little research and find the baby resell shops in your area to check out their selection and prices.

I have 2 kids and the only things I've bought new were t-shirts and socks and diapers, of course. Everything else I've found at garage sales, thrift shops, re-sale shops plus a lot of hand-me-downs and gifts. There is a huge glut of baby stuff out there as most only gets used a few months. Take advantage of that and save major $$$$ : )

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magdelena

The above posters did such a good job that I'm not going to touch on every point-- just the few that I feel most strongly about.

Do remodel the kitchen-- those projects often end up taking a lot longer than you might anticipate-- let me tell you not having a usable kitchen for the first few months after you have a baby is NO FUN (don't ask me how i know!) :)

Don't buy any baby stuff until you are in 2nd tri-mester. We MC'd the first time around-- I was awfully glad not to have to look at baby stuff! And people find out they are pregnant so soon now that it feels like you are pregnant FOREVER-- you will be happy to have things to do to prepare.

I really liked the idea of living on one income and saving the 2nd. It's good practice and nice to be building a little security. If you can figure out any way to be a SAHM-- DO IT!! There's no better gift that you can give your child than a good start in life-- and that means spending time bonding with YOU! If you can't be a SAHM-- figure out a way to work opposite DH so one of you is with child as much as possible.

If you are overweight or out of shape at all--do start working on it now. I lost 20 lbs. before first pregnancy and 20 more between pregnancies-- I felt pretty comfortable all the way through (and I could wear my pre-pregnancy clothes until partway through 7th month!).

Good luck!! HTH!!

Magdelena

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AspenE

I agree with the above post. Lose the extra weight before trying to conceive. I was about 15 lbs heavier than I like to be when I conceived (last February) It was right after the holiday eating binge and I fractured my foot and was unable to work out for a month and a half which led to the weight gain. I was thrilled to be pregnant, but not to start out fifteen lbs ahead already! My baby was born 11 weeks ago, and I have 10lbs till I am down to where I was at when I became pregnant, but then I STILL have fifteen more to go after that! YUCK! Be careful though, you don't want to lose too much, or lose too fast because that could upset you menstrual cycle and all your hormones. Maybe just exercise a bit more and make sure you are eating a healthy diet. I would start on prenatals because they are so important! My doctor said the ones over the counter are just as good as prescription. I would take a vacation, or even just stay in a hotel for a night. Save $$ as much as you can. I am a teacher, and when school lets out in May I will not be coming back...my baby needs me...I miss him so much right this minute I could cry! You will want to be with your baby if at all possible so start that home based business. Don't buy baby things till your pregnant, and even then, I have just recently learned...DON'T BUY NEWBORN STUFF! My baby is 2 1/2 months and this morning he is comfortably wearing a 6month outfit! He is not fat...just so long! So many people will give you newborn stuff, they will wear it once. Save your $$$ for when all the gifts quit pouring in. When I was pregnant, I started stockpiling diapers. This has helped a TON. I kept all the receipts in case my baby didn't do well with a particular brand I could return them, but so far he is doing great. We haven't returned any! We just went and bought a jumbo pack of diapers every pay period while I was pregnant. That sure helped. We probably won't be buying diapers for a year! It's nice, because since we are paying daycare until May money is tighter, and diapers are expensive even with coupons, so it was nice to get that out of the way. I will quit rambling, everyone else answered so well it looks like you have tons of great help!

Aspen (and baby Logan)

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