My grandma taught my Mom who repeated it to me, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all!" and... "If you look hard enough, you can find some good in every one." My Grandma (her pet name for me was "Obbie"...for some reason, I didn't pronouce "Grandma" and "Awe-bee" was the name she answered to when I was a small child. Even her neighbors & lots of friends called her "Obbie" throughout the years of my growing up. She was a "hired girl" on farms when she was a teenager...she was married and divorced at a young age...she was widowed after another marriage to my grandpa of 26 yrs...she worked in a bakery, she operated a cafe, she ironed clothes in her home for other families...she was always a HARD worker!...she passed that on to her 3 daughters & family. Here are some of my precious memories of my Grandma, Obbie that I wrote back in 1984 for a genealogy book my Mom created: In the back yard, Obbie had lots of flower gardens. I once found the cactus garden with my bare feet when I jumped a fence playing (where I shouldn't have been)! There were also lots of sour grapes, good ripe strawbeeries and lots of green apples. We were never without homegrown food at Obbie's. And, oh, that homemade jar of strawberry jam. Of course, inside the house, there were always homemade chocolate chip cookies. And on Sundays, the smell of Obbie frying chicken (that my 'grandpa butchered). Anyone was welcome to show up for Sunday dinner! Obbie taught me a few of the things every woman was supposed to know before growing up. The ol' treadle sewing machine put out lots of doll clothes and pin cushions. Crocheting chain stitches (by the miles). Obbie crocheted each grandchild an afghan for graduation. Never being bored at Obbie's, there were always old catalogs for cutting out paper dolls and clothes. (Ok, Gjers, I could go on & on...but I just want you to know that I was very blessed...I was a "crouper" as a child and finally outgrew it at 12 yrs. old...but my Obbie would always come running when I got sick...with "warm 7-up" and hugs. Anyway, I will end this post with a poem I wrote for this genealogy book (she died when my first grandchild was 4 mos. old): "My grandma, Obbie, always had time for her grandchildren. She was never too busy to forget us. I am the lucky one even to have had Obbie for my grandma... If I can be as strong, as you were strong, If I can give, as you have given, If I can be kind, as you always were kind, If I am loved, as you are loved, If I am cherised, as you are cherished, If I am mourned, as you are mourned, Then I can say..my life is truly blessed. Obbie passed on her love for gardening & flowers to me...as my grandpa did also...and my Dad. Here is a pic that I am so fortunate to have of my Grandma holding me in her backyard...I lived in the same household the first 2 yrs. of my life...and her LOVE shaped my life. Ahhh, pretty sentimental stuff...but I enjoyed all of your sharing and wanted to share a bit of this special lady! Thanks, Jeanne S.

Guys, thank you for your kind thoughts concerning DSIL's sweet Mother. It all happened during strange weather. There were no church services today--we had a small service at the kid's house---we live next door to each other. We were doing pretty well 'til we tried to sing 'In the Sweet By and By' for our closing hymn. We were crying and then laughing at the same time! (If DSIL's Mom had been there, she would've made him go get a switch so she could swat him one!)

* The mantle of Mrs. Grundy - a figurative name for an extremely conventional person who worries about being different * The Grand Guignol - a Parisian theater that opened in 1897 * The "qui vive" of expectation - Que vive? Is a question: Who goes there? To be on the alert, suspicious. * Carlyle on the Dutch (who was who and who did what?) - Carlyle was Scottish writer/philosopher in nineteenth century who wrote social/political criticism. Not sure about the Dutch reference. Any ideas? * Cassandra could have looked more gloomily prophetic - Cassandra was the royal daughter at the time of the Trojan War. She rejected ApolloâÂÂs advances and in retaliation, he made it so no one would believe what she said. (Perhaps âÂÂgloomily prophecticâ due to this?) * A veritable colossus of negation - âÂÂcolossusâ was a huge ancient statue on the Greek island of Rhodes, so perhaps this refers to how immovable negativity is when people espouse it strongly * Fox (re: pity?) - not sure about this one. * Bib and tucker (clothing) - refers to oneâÂÂs best clothes; first used in 18th century. âÂÂBibsâ were similar to current day baby bibs, except these were worn by adults over their clothes (mostly women). Made of lace and fitted over the bodice; sometimes called âÂÂpinnersâ or âÂÂmodesty piecesâÂÂ. âÂÂTuckerâ were bibs that were tucked in. (Pinners/Bibs were pinned and tuckers were tucked.) Linked with âÂÂpinaforeâÂÂ, âÂÂpin-a-foreâÂÂ: a pin/bib thatâÂÂs pinned on the front of clothing. (Taken from Patricia Brent, Spinster - Herbert Jenkins.)

1. A little 1BR brownstone overlooking the Mississippi River in St Paul -- my then-partner and I had to find a place quickly, so we didn't look at a lot of places; I stumbled upon it in a Craigslist ad. I toured the place on an autumn afternoon; it was filled with golden hour light and I instantly fell under its spell. The light was delicious and inviting. West-facing windows, with the river in view. Wood floors, kitchen built-ins. The kitchen sink was quite large but exceptionally splashy, somehow. There was zero counter space, but we opened up our dining room table (which squeezed into the kitchenette extension) and used that for prep. The whole place was maybe 650' square. 700?. The maintenance lady didn't know (she was the face of the landlord, who operates out of NY). The bedroom closet was atrociously small and awkward, but we had a big walk-in hall closet and basement storage. I loved the view and the light. One of the two cats lived almost permanently in a living room window. We had a pull-out couch in the living room for a young family member to visit, and it worked perfectly (though I later had a tough time getting rid of that couch--so heavy! It sadly ended up in a dumpster bc no one wanted to buy it and no places took those couches as donation). We even hosted a Christmas (desserts and apps only) that was amazingly fun (6 adults, 2 cats, and 1 doted-upon little boy)... It's still one of my favorite memories of adult holiday gatherings. Parking was terribly limited in the area. We ended up buying a parking spot on site for $70/month, Total rent... with parking was $925 or $950, i think. A lot for us at the time (just a couple years ago... 2013-ish). We were in our early 30s... two masters students scrounging a living and trying to put our lives together... and lived there about a year and a half. I enjoyed it! I loved that warm ombré rug! It was sold after I left the apartment after this. that radiator in the window had a marble(?) cover over it that created a great kitty window perch. Though the kitchen was tiny, I made some great meals (when there was time). to be continued with the next place...