I don't think having a weekend place "only 20 minutes" from your main home is funny, or even all that unusual in some towns. With the price of gas today, that's probably a plus. (Who wants to spend that much time on the road anyway?) I'm not sure how I feel about that style - and I should because I lived in one for a few years, and lived next door to an even more elaborate one longer than that. I thought they were fabulous when I was younger, and I can't really say that I ever disliked it while living in it. I guess my major complaint about that style is that it seems completely disconnected from all that came before it. Traditional architecture has evolved over hundreds or thousands of years, while those modern buildings just popped up out of a few people's (such as FLW's) fervent minds. As I've grown older, I've developed more appreciation for more traditionally styled buildings and how they fulfill our needs of all manner. Speaking of which, I trust you tend towards the exhibitionist, rather than voyeur, on the scale of human inclinations, since the dominance of windows would undoubtedly scare you otherwise. And I trust you also have great appreciation for brick (the one traditional element of this house) that seems to pervade most of the spaces. If you love it that much, I say go for it if the finances make sense. At least that way you'll find out just how fun it is living in a place like that. Keep that offer low, though, because even in a good market, the more eccentric buildings are much slower to move (in case the reality is less fulfilling than your dream). With the big yard, I can see it filling the "getaway" role, with parties, lively yard games, with plenty of opportunity for blending indoor and outdoor living. (Guests may have to stay at the local motel, or a tent, but that's not necessarily a bad thing). And I can almost guarantee you that buying it and enjoying it as the architect intended will be much more enjoyable than going through the building process yourself.

Glad this is taking a better turn. I refrained from comment intially because I am both an adopter and a volunteer with rescue groups. Yep, we all have serious jobs and lives and fit this fostering and home visiting stuff into our evenings and week-ends. I don't think three weeks is excessive considering that in that time the application was reviewed, your references were likely checked, a home visit appt was scheduled and completed, and the application was approved. Two weeks would be ideal given that most of the visits happen on week-ends, but during busy times when volunteers are on vacation, three weeks doesn't sound like 'forever.' "It seems that in their eagerness to remind me that rescue dogs come with ''baggage'' and that I may want to adopt from a breeder if I'm concerned about health issues, they are less concerned about finding good homes for the dogs than their own agenda." I suspect that their 'agenda' is a permanent placement for the dog. Although you say that you would work with any dog with problems, your requests do raise red flags that would trigger any responsible volunteer to have the 'dogs change, dogs have issues' discussion with you or any applicant. It isn't 'personal'. What you probably ran into were experienced volunteers testing a bit (given your requests) to make sure that the dog wouldn't bounce again. Obviously, they found you sincere and a good potential home, so please forgive them for treating you like any other applicant. Many applicants are not experienced and many really do have unrealistic expectations that no dog can meet and see nothing wrong with returning animals if they don't magically and perfectly fit into the household. What strikes me oddly here is that they don't have photos of the dogs on a website. Maybe you could 'give back' (whether you do or do not adopt the pup you're interested in) by volunteering with the group and taking photos of the dogs for display on the groups website. By doing that you'd be helping many other dogs and many other applicants. Good luck, and do deep us posted.

Very good point justmetoo! To get to the root of the problem you need to find out what is triggering it. Although I'm sorry the whole sex addict thing is a boy for you. I know they all hit pueberty at different ages, have you noticed any physical changes about him yet? Get passwords on that computer just so he doesn't end up costing you $$ but you will never stop him from looking at naked pictures altogether. He will settle for the JC Penny catalogue if he has to. You said he admitted he was on the computer and didn't lie so that itself is a positive thing. I really think he needs someone to talk with, prefferably a male role model. Since it seems he hasn't gotten a grasp on proper behavior. It's not that "sex" is bad/dirty nor is having the uncontrollable hormones he is most likely experiencing.. but these are things I'm sure he's just not comfortable discussing with Grandma. My son is nearly 13 and just starting to go into puberty. my computers are locked down so tight they need me to research breastcancer for school projects. However; I walked into his room the other day to see on the wall a scantily (and I mean VERY scantily) clad model on a motorcycle. I thought about tearing it down but decided against it. Instead I sat with him and asked him why he liked that picture.. and without skipping a beat he looked right at me and said "Mom she's beautiful and that bike is awesome." I realized you know what he's right. She IS beautiful, and the bike IS awesome. And he is searching for some way to make the confusing feelings he is going through "OK" This conversation led into a very open conversation where he opened up to me about feeling different because alot of his friends weren't going through this yet. Granted my parenting style is a combination of old school hard a$$ and new age openess.. Depends on the situation. But in our discussion I admitted to him that there are things he is going to go through that I won't understand and his Dad may have to fill in for me. Surprizingly he told me "nah you'll do ok Mom you've never lied to me before and when it comes to girls if I ask you it gives me an inside track!" Sorry got off track there =) My whole thought process here is your grandson IS at that age. and depending on the issues, alot of it is probably centered around the stage of life he's in at the moment. He needs guidance from someone he can feel comfortable with. He needs to know he ISN't abnormal for feeling those feelings and having those urges. It has to be someone who is comfortable with explaining to him appropriate and inappropriate actions in relation to sex. In my case my husband has a hard time with that he still uses nicknames for bodyparts with our oldest daughter for goodness sakes (she's 21) If you can't look at the child and say the actual word for the sex organ, You are not the one they need to speak with that has been my motto. Be ready to openly disscuss what is ok and what is not and explain in detail why. Kids want knowledge they want to feel normal.

I can't really speak on adoptions and name changes but I can say that my father was a bit upset that I did not choose to change my name back to my maiden name after I divorced my DS's father. I explained to him that I thought it could be a bit confusing, considering my maiden name and married name differed by only the first letter. I was afraid of the confusion it would cause, having a different name from my children yet at the same time our names were so similar. Now being remarried, my children's names and my name are completely different by every letter...When I did first marry my DH, I do have to say that my eldest DS said that he felt "out of place" and wanted to have his last name changed to DH's last name. That was a difficult time for him...suddenly he started writing DH's last name on his school papers. Based on this, I would say it is important to get a real answer from your son about what his thoughts are on this. It would be a little confusing changing his last name on school records, doctor's records, etc, but not really much different than a woman having to do the same thing after she marries and her name changes. As for him feeling later on that he may have betrayed your side of the family, there is always that option of changing it back. The real questions are: How does he feel about it now? How do you feel about it now? And how does DH feel about it now?