I think you have been more than fair with your wife. She knew what she was getting into when she married you and you have been a real treasure, making sure she is looked after if anything should happen to you.

So why would she come out and say this after all this time ?

Perhaps she is feeling insecure for some reason.

Did something happen that you can think of, that could facilitate her reaction ? Does she meet with your ex, socially ?

I assume you have asked her "why" ?

Perhaps if you just explained to her, how the accounts work in the business, talked about what would happen if things went wrong.

Sorry I can't be more help, I am sure you will have some good suggestions from the other posters.

POPI

I smell a hidden agenda emerging. Be vigilant. Better yet, get it straight with her right now. No sense in having this kind of doubt poisoning the atmosphere between you.

Exactly what wonderfulness or other assets did your new wife bring to the union? Has she been talking with her girlfriends? So far, you've described very strong consideration from yourself to her. Would be interested to learn where her new dictator-syndrome comes from.

Sure - I can see how it would make a woman feel insecure...
But that type of doubt is something a sane woman works through *well* before contemplating marriage.

I agree with the other posters that from what you've written, you've been completely honerable and fair with her, and that it's not reasonable of her to ask now to change the rules.

But I also have to wonder if something has happened that has triggered her insecurities. Is your relationship with your Ex anything she should be concerned about? Or has something happened that would give her reason to feel that way? If your Ex still has romantic feelings for you, or if your wife has reason to suspect she does, then that would constitute grounds for reconsideration.

Generally, women that have a overly jealous nature always have it; it's not something that will all of a sudden pop up for no reason.

I tend to think there is more to your story than maybe even you realize. Maybe your wife thought your relationship with your "X" was totally professional and was a little put back by you being made her son's Godfather. Maybe there are even some 'rumors' floating around about the kid being yours, etc. If your relationship is as friendly as it sounds, I wouldn't doubt people have thought it. Do you travel alone with your "X" or spend a lot of personal time with her? Maybe there is some reason that she really believes your "X' has it in for you, or even her. I wouldn't necessarily believe that her emotions are just insecurities or jealously...often women can sense possible problems ahead of time.

I'd really have an open mind and hear her out. Her concerns, jealously or whatever may have some merit or be justified in some ways. Even maybe distancing yourself from your "X" personally may be a compromise. I'm not sure I could handle my husband not only working with, but also having a very close personal relationship with someone he was once deeply in love with... even if I originally accepted it in a relationship, it may not be heathly for the long run and she may just be realizing this now. How would you feel if the roles were reversed?

"She told me that no woman would allow her man to have a joint account in a business."

"allow"?
"her man"?

I can just see my mother saying something like that to my father.

After he got through laughing, he'd have taken off his glasses & wiped his eyes & said, "now what's the problem here?"

On a practical level, what does she think you should do?

Sell your half of the business & go look for a job?

Try to make your ex-wife/business partner sell you her half?

I'm no lawyer, but hey, I've watched enough of them on TV - isn't that where most of us get our educations these days? Sounds to me like you are screwed.

I'd tell my heart to shut-up and go consult a lawyer. Too late for a good pre-nup but there still may be moves you can take now in the event that she's plotting. I think she's trying to get her hands on the money in the business.

Trust is a major part of the foundation of any relationship. It sounds to me like either she doesn't trust you or she has a hidden agenda. If you've given her no reason for doubt then I think she's going over the edge - or she's feathering her nest prior to the next victim. Sounds like you've got plenty of cash. Have you considered getting a private investigator to find out if she's up to no good?

Sorry I'm so skeptical but I'm also a realist. The beatch knew about this prior to the marriage.

If you were dirt poor I'd be inclined to say that maybe she's insecure and jealous. But I'm betting there's a lot of cash at stake here.

When this relationship goes belly-up, be sure the next woman you hook up with has more money than you, that way you come out better in the event of another breakup.

I didn't think of it, but securelurker may be onto something;

don't know about other states, but Texas is a community property state.

Assets acquired after the marriage, with a few exceptions like inheritances, belong to both partners.

Money that hubs had in the bank prior to the marriage would likely be his separate property, but if hubs buys out ex-wife, then new wife might own half of ex-wife's half.

at least.

I once sold a house for a guy who had the saddest story.

Paul's grandmother had owned her house free & clear.

She told her only son, Paul's father, who was her executor, that she wanted Paul to have the house.
The other 2 grandchildren had more money & fewer children than Paul, & Paul always had been her pet.

However, she didn't dictate that in her will;
she just told her son what she wanted.

When she died, Paul's father decided that that wasn't fair to the other grandchildren, so he came up with a complicated formula by which Paul "owed" about $18,000 to make each grandchild's portion roughly equal.

Paul, a normal blue-collar payday-to-payday working father, had to take out a mortgage to pay the $18000.

Several years later, when Paul's wife filed for divorce, the judge decreed that the house was community property because it had been *bought* after the marriage.

Had he *inherited* it, it would have been his separate property.

so Paul had to sell the house that his grandmother had wanted him to have, & half the proceeds went to his ex-wife.

OP might do well to consult an attorney.

I wish you the best.

Lots of varied opinions here.I agree with most of it. Either your wife is after the money,very insecure,or like popi suggested,something happend that is making her feel threatend.
If I were you,I'd probe alot deeper as to why she feels this way. Did your ex say something to her? Did she flirt with you in anyway? Is she causing any other problems? All questions that must be answered so you can tell what is really going here with your wife.
Maybe she always had a problem with it and now that she's wife she thinks she can get you to do what she wants.