I caught my husband......
lonelywife
16 years ago
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mom2emall
16 years agoRelated Discussions
I caught my MIL regifting a gift we gave them...
Comments (21)Oh, yum, nothing like some nice 5 month old chips and salsa, Haley! lol I hope your BIL has a strong constitution. :) I never caught MIL regifting the things we had given her, but when we cleaned out her house after she died, I think I came across about 3 things that we had given her over the course of 20+ years. And we had given her nice, pricey things. She kept one afghan, one of those heavy woven ones, and a clock made of inlaid woods and a handmade quilting basket. I remember snorting out loud once when she exclaimed "oh you always give the best gifts!". Woody and I both laughed because she never displayed or used barely any of the things we gave her but was always so proud of the tacky junk that her great-nieces and nephews sent up, stuff like the toilet piggy bank that "flushed" when you put money in it. Yeah, she liked that a lot. lol And the motion activated frog. I regift, too, though, so I don't really have a problem with it IF the regift fits the recipient. Otherwise you're just being cheap. I would hate to get caught at it because I don't like hurting someone's feelings, but I am not going to keep something around me that I don't like and won't use, I'll donate it to the thrift shop if I don't have a friend that would like it....See MoreWhat do I do if I cant trust my husband???? Help Me Please!!
Comments (15)WOW All we got here is a lot of neuroses popping out in all directions ... someone who was cheated on is SURE that the behavior means cheating, someone who was not cheated on thinks it means nothing ... and we have no real substantive data to make an evaluation on, so we all go off half-cocked based on our own positive or negative neurotic interpretations of her situation. None of that helps ... So what to do ? Well first of all concentrate on your own mental health and happiness and stability OUTSIDE of fixations with him. Reward yourself a couple times a day in some small constructive way for good things you do. Reward him in some small ways with a "thank you" when he does something good for you ... "Catch him doing something good" make the most of things and be as positive as you can be. If there is a real and substntive problem, it will eventually be fully revealed, if not, worrying and crying and getting upset will not help ... but just create a problem for you and him both. Make yourself happy and healthy. Dont hold your life hostage to his....See Morekkny and tos your expertise is needed
Comments (4)Personally, I think they could offer lots of insight into the marriage forum. I've suggested it before and it wasn't meant to 'get rid of' them but I really think anyone that has over 20 years in a marriage, has probably got pointers for those that are having problems early on. I also think their insight into cheating might open some eyes over there if there are people defending guys that cheat via hookers. I don't think people that think it's okay because it's a hooker and it's more of a business transaction, not an emotional attraction (as they might argue) think of the damage that it does to families... trust between the spouses and the pain it causes the children. (or the humiliation it causes everyone they know when they get arrested as a 'john')...See More"my bad", appologies that only mean, "I'm sorry I got caught"
Comments (2)My situation has many similarities to yours, and I agree with everything Silviatexas has said. My stepson was recently diagnosed with PTSD and some ODD. It's sad and we're getting him counselling, but we need to keep him in line to protect the wellbeing of the other kids, and adults, in the house. We also need to protect our marriage because it's the foundation of the family. You and your husband need to set boundaries right now, and enforce them in every single case. There must be a consequence for every rude behaviour. Communication can be quite simple - "rude comment means no cell phone for a week. Next time, it's a month". It works like a charm in our house. Therapy is essential, and you might also want to consider some extracurriculars for the boys to given them some structure and self respect. The psychologist recommended cadets for my stepson. Sleep away camp this summer was also very good for him. They will not want to do these things but, again, the adults control the computer, cellphone and TV. If your husband is a decent father, he will enforce the rules and ensure that the boys stay in line. If not, you need to reassess whether this man is a good stepparent for your children. It is not your job to be patient while chaos ensues in your house. It is your job to support your husband while he raises his children. If he isn't doing his part, then you are already on your own....See Morehalfdecaf
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