Shehada, I'm sorry that you and your partner are having this rough time. Menopause can cause all kinds of mood swings and anxiety. She's riding a roller coaster that has no "off" switch. I see that you care about her, and that you are trying to understand what this time of life brings her. (I'm assuming that your diagnosis of menopause was from a doctor, or other medical professional. She's quite young for menopause; if she is self-diagnosing, there may be other things going on.)

However. That does not absolve her for her actions. Women in menopause are affected by the hormonal storm going on in their bodies, but they are not controlled by it. They are not helpless to control their actions and their words. She is responsible for these cruel things that she is saying and doing, not you.

She may be your beacon, but you don't have to allow yourself to be verbally and emotionally abused like this. Find a counselor or therapist who can help you understand what is driving her, and where your boundaries belong. Then you can make a decision about how you want to live the rest of your life. Just remember, you can't make her act differently. She has total control over her words and actions. You can only control how you respond.

Vjrnts, thanks for your reply....
i guess i was an optimist by thinking the hormones are responsible for the complete change....she wasn't self diagnosed a doc did that.
thank you for the reply, I appreciate it.

some ships are meant to wander forever.