I am the one who suggested calling law enforcement. If the pictures really are explicit, they could be considered pornography which is illegal. No, this wouldn't stop the activity, but would at least slow down the publicity.

What kind of person answers an add for anonymous, one-time-only sex? First, it is a person with no morals. Next it is a person who is either really stupid or really desperate. (The ad poster could be a serial killer for all they know.) Sorry, I don't care to have my neighborhood visited by immoral people desperate for sex. Being gay does not mean you are a pedophile, but it also doesn't exempt you from being a pedophile. Pedophiles can fall into all segments of the population. As a mother, this kind of activity/traffic would make me very uncomfortable. I find it a little odd that two of the posters who spoke up so adamantly for the rights of the ad-poster, have no children of their own. Don't tell a mother what she should worry about or not worry about.

Frankly, I am tired of bowing before the altar of political correctness. If this was a straight couple, we'd label them perverts. If a straight woman advertised for multiple, no-strings-attached partners, she would be a whore. But since it is a homosexual couple ... sshhhh ... don't say anything, you might be a "hater". So what? I have a right to like and dislike whatever I wish. I might not be able to stop the activity, but that doesn't mean I have to condone it. There is a segment (not all, a segment) of the homosexual community that seems to relish throwing their sexuality in everyone else's faces. It's almost as if they are taunting us to say something. (So then, they could label us "haters".) If you want to be respected, then act respectably.

n2cookin, We live in a neighborhood like yours, 20 homes on small acreages. My DS rides his bike up and down our culdesac, and I would be livid if I found out someone had advertised for any sexual activity, causing strangers to drive up and down our neighborhood. If the guy met someone and talked to them and found out a little about them first, and brought him home, then that would be none of my business. But, to bring multiple strangers into your neighborhood who could or could not be a predator, is wrong IMO. If you didn't know about it, then, of course, you would never know, unless something happened, but, since you do, you need to do something about it, instead of turning a blind eye.

Like spitfire said, he is probably desperate and I don't trust anyone that is so desperate to post explicit photos of himself. I would worry him as a neighbor, especially with kids and all.

Okay, so what about someone who advertises the sale of a piece of furniture on CL? That brings multiple strangers to the neighborhood who could or could not be a predator.

The men who come to his house are coming to his house for one reason - and it's not to prowl your cul-de-sac looking for children to victimize. If someone were looking to prowl your cul-de-sac for children, they would not need to be invited to someone's home to do so. Last time I checked streets were public areas - no invite required.

BTW I don't know about the general population here, but after getting to know most of the people who have responded on this thread I cannot imagine them being any more scornful of the activity if it were among heterosexuals. And I don't see how this guy is throwing anything in anyone's face. No one knew the first thing about his sexual life until SOMEONE (a "pervert" themselves?) went to the sex ads on craigslist and spread that info among the neighbors. Unless he was advertising in an inappropriate place where people who are not interested int his type of activity can't help but see the ad, how is it throwing it in anyone's face?

If you think you can control who visits your neighborhood then I suggest you put up a gate and do background checks and fingerprint scans of everyone who passes that gate. Otherwise, this is part of what happens when we live in society. It takes all types.

Pornography is illegal? Since when?

Mari, you said everything so very well. I'm astounded that some here apparently feel qualified to appoint themselves as the morality police. What goes on in someone else's home among consenting adults does not concern you in any way, shape, or form. But perhaps you'll believe it more when law enforcement advises you, after you've called to "report the perverts."

I find it a little odd that two of the posters who spoke up so adamantly for the rights of the ad-poster, have no children of their own. Don't tell a mother what she should worry about or not worry about.

I won't even go there. That doesn't even deserve a thoughtful response.

If a straight woman advertised for multiple, no-strings-attached partners, she would be a whore.

If you're going to sling names, at least know what they mean. A whore is someone who charges for sexual services.

Good grief - it's only SEX! Why is this a subject that gets people so incredibly riled up? I guarantee you that there are sexual predelictions among the people we encounter every day at our jobs, schools, churches - even among our own family members - that would blow the minds of people who seem to care so much about such things. I would think there must be countless things that truly are the concern of the community that could benefit from the energy directed towards "rooting out the sexual deviants."

I thought the distinction was that a whore might give it away or sell it, but a prostitute only sells it.

Wasn't there a case in Florida or thereabouts where the parents advertised for other swingers and their child turned up missing and was presumed to have been taken by someone who had been in their home?

Disregard that last sentence. That was the defense used by the neighbor who abducted the child.

jmari, you write so well and state it all ; and I agree with you and aj.

Parents have to protect their children, it could be against your church minister,a teacher, your uncle, etc.... I can understand the initial concern or maybe "surprise" would be the better word, upon discovering the ads, but if you reason it out, you can't do anything about it.

did your neighbor tell you how the ads were discovered?

Wiki defines "whore" as a prostitute - one who charges for her services, but Merriam allows for a broader interpretation to include "an unscrupulous person." So my apologies to spitfire in that regard. (I've personally never used the word to describe anyone other than one who charges ...)

Graywings, I'm not sure of the point you're making. I would imagine there are countless cases where fathers and uncles and grandfathers and step-dads and mothers and contractors and priests and babysitters (and so on) have abused or abducted children as well.

"(I've personally never used the word to describe anyone other than one who charges ...)"

The only time I've ever used the word was when it was from a quote--as in..."You can lead a whore to culture but you can't make her think."

Ah, the good old days. :)

The whole motivation for this ad, is sexual. Not buying a piece of furniture! I am not saying all that would answer this kind of ad, would be a danger, but, these kinds of ads bring out the worst people, along with some honest hard-working people, but, mostly the worst. Frankly, I would keep an eye out on your neighbor to put an ad of himself on CL.

Nowadays, there are plenty of places to go, to get what someone might want sexually.

We have a neighbor that I feel I have to keep an eye on, because he is so against the government. He even has a website with some "on the fence" things on it. Not enough to call in the authorities, but, believe me, anyone with questionable behavior, I will be looking over our shoulder.

I am sorry this man is bringing this into your neighborhood.

Well, now I'm pretty much speechless.

I WAS WRONG!!! I haven't even read the rest of the responses, but as soon as I left, I realized pornography isn't illegal. I was thinking of the recent case where those teenagers were arrested for passing nude photos from their phones. But weren't they arrested b/c they were underage?

However, I stand by the rest of my statements. I would not like the idea of a free brothel in my neighborhood regardless of the sexual preferences of those involved. However, as soon as you bring homosexuality into the mix, we all have to walk on eggshells to avoid being intolerant.

So, olliesmom, since you are so confident about the kind of people that answer sexually explicit ads, I guess we should assume you have personal experience in this area? Tell us, do you place ads or answer them? And what's the percentage of creeps you get?

And for the record, I have a kid, so I'm allowed to post on this thread.

sandyponder

I don't believe all pornography or sexual activities are legal.

I also think Cookin's thoughts and concerns have been totally warped. And since when don't people or mothers worry about the strangers coming through their neighborhood? And the old 'don't talk to strangers thing.'

Quick google on porn:

Here is a link that might be useful: Porn Definitions and Legality

Mari--thanks for the correction.

Idle thought--it's entirely possible that some posters (and lurkers) are gay. I wonder how those people feel when they read threads like this?

Do unto others, etc.

No, but it sounds as if you do have personal experience in this area. Please inform us. Ok, sandyponder, they are ALL good people and deserve to traffic through our neighborhoods, does that make you feel better? And, how do you know they ARE good people, you have personal experience? And, if you do have experience in this area, I would be very careful having a child around any strangers you bring to your house.

I guess I have just never been so desperate, and, the heterosexual and gay people that I have associated with would not put themselves down to that level.

Oh, I didn't realize you had to have a kid to post about this.

Johnmari - I don't think it's a "strawmans" comment at ALL. My point is that when you live in a neighborhood, regardless of what you do in your own space, you should still have to consider your neighbors. We do!!! I don't give a rats ass about any one's sexual preference or even that they were advertising, that isn't the issue for ME. Honestly, I'm disappointed at some of the comments here and think some are completely unwarranted. My point is there's a lot of looneys out there, if they don't know the people they're inviting over whether you agree or not, IMHO they are posing a risk to the neighborhood. Look at the guy they caught killing women advertising on CL. Perfect example. And maybe where you live that's not an issue, but where WE LIVE it is. I think it's a disregard to their neighbors and I'd be concerned.

First Johnmari says this:

".... Gossip is a nasty habit. Baseless gossip is an even worse one...."

And then she proceeds to tell us the following:

"Some of the most "unsavory characters" I have ever encountered were clean-cut, heterosexual, married-with-children, ostentatiously churchgoing, business-owning, run-for-town-office "pillars of the community" - who were also engaging in such admirable behaviors like bigotry, lying, cheating on their partners, theft/embezzlement, substance abuse, physical/emotional/sexual abuse of their partners and/or children, and general all-around-scumbaggery..."

Did all of these people tell you in person about their sins, Johnmari, or have you been doing a little gossiping of your own lately? And what exactly do you personally know of Tommy Lee's endowment, hmmmmm?

N2cookin is precisely right to worry about who is in the neighborhood and I'd suggest that she checks the national sex offender registry as well. It's at www.nsopw.gov, and it's an eye opening experience to plug in your zip code and find out exactly how close a registered child molester may live to your home. For some reason on these threads, thinly veiled bigotry against the religious is tolerated while politically correct tolerance of much that I find abhorrent is fully expected.

I agree Organic Bama mama.
And the sex offender registry is quite interesting. There are several registered offenders who live near me.

olliesmom, sadly, I was married long before CL, so never got the chance to hook up via the internet, but I have friends who do/have, and they think it suits their needs just fine. If CL facilitates a little more happiness in the world between consenting adults, it's all good as far as I'm concerned.

organicbamamama, I can't speak for johnmari, and I haven't seen Tommy Lee's equipment live and in person, but I have seen it on video (with half of the rest of the Earth), and I have to say, it's impressive, but I could never get past the tats, so he's not for me. And my disdain for fundamentalist religions and their hypocritical teachings isn't thinly veiled at all, it's on display for all to see, hear or read.

sandyponder

I've skimmed the original post and the responses, but I always wonder how these ads get discovered "by accident".

I'll admit that I have looked at the craigslist ads out of general curiousity, and just to see if there is anyone I recognize, and there have been. I always wonder about people who don't mind putting their pictures out there.

I have also seen neighborhood people on the sex offender's site that I recognize. I think that most people think that everyone on there is a pedophile, but the reality of it is all sorts of offenses are on there. My niece has a college friend who is on there because he has been arrested for public nudity and urinating in public all when he was also drunk.
He has an alcohol problem but sexually he is not a threat to society, and here is is at 21 registering as a sex offender.

So, go ahead and look at these sites if you want, but understand what you are looking at.

I think all of you are right, you have to be careful, concerned, street smart and to an extent, tolerant of others.

I never thought that when I started working as a waitress in college that I would end up four years later on a witness stand for murder. You just never know about a person, it's really sad and scary to realize what people are capable of.

As a mother and someone living in the neighborhood, I think your concern is valid.

Maybe focus on the things you can control, like making sure your children are careful and street smart when it comes to people they don't know really well. Make sure your house is secure with good locks, alarm, motion lights, whatever you feel you need as safety prevention.

You can never prevent something from happening 100%, but having some plan of prevention should help with the feelings of concern.

Well, Sandy, believe whatever you want, but please keep it under wraps here. I don't understand why that's such a problem for you.

I'll say at the outset that I share the opinion of AuntJen, JohnMari and several others. I can't imagine how or why people believe that it is ANYONE'S business what a consenting adult does, that affects not a single other individual nearby, in the privacy of his/her own home, simply because said consenting adult happened to buy that home close to the concern-ee.

Actually as far as being worried about what's happening in somebody's house that puts others at risk, seems to me that Bernie Madoff's neighbors must then be pretty darn culpable...because that guy's actions seriously hurt *thousands* of people including innocent victims of both investments and charitable donations.

I believe most of the issue here arises from two social norms in this country:

-As a society, the US is stunningly reticent and prudish about sexuality. Violence, not so much. We shoot, stab and kill each other in numbers that leave the rest of the world agape, and that seems to be pretty much accepted. We watch television and movies that glorify the absolutely worst kind of brutality, and that seems to be normal entertainment. But a flash of skin or a personal sex ad that offends the 'decent' folks...watch out.

-The media have created a cultural perception of crime and victimhood that is beyond skewed, it is simply untrue. The fact is, a child in the US is overwhelmingly more likely to come to harm, be it sexual or violent, from a family member or friend rather than a random stranger or neighbor. That is simply a fact. However, if one watches media coverage it can certainly seem as if the opposite is true. It isn't, and I believe people would be better served by turning off the local and cable news outlets and concentrating on becoming informed about what really lies in wait to harm our children, and ourselves for that matter.

Ann

This may well get me a "friendly reminder", but what the heck.

I would be defending someone's right to engage in whatever sexual activities among consenting adults, in the privacy of their home that they wish, no matter whether they were gay, straight, bisexual, whatever. Doesn't have anything at all to do with political correctness, and everything to do with minding my own business and with having basic decency toward other people who have done absolutely nothing to me.

" If this was a straight couple, we'd label them perverts. If a straight woman advertised for multiple, no-strings-attached partners, she would be a whore. But since it is a homosexual couple ... sshhhh ... don't say anything, you might be a "hater"."

Nope, insulting people you don't even know by calling them them derogatory names like "perverts" and "whores" definitely qualifies someone as a "hater" AFAIC. (And what's this "WE", kemosabe? You d@mn well better not think you speak for me when you go calling people perverts and whores, because you most definitely don't.)

As another poster noted, what about the person who originally found this alleged posting, what were they doing in the "men seeking men" (or "casual encounters") category of CL to find that ad to begin with... shall s/he be vilified as a "pervert" and "immoral" too? I'd still be demanding proof, not unfounded hearsay, before passing judgement against someone - it is almost impossible to defend oneself from this kind of vicious gossip once it really gets rolling, and it always gets worse as it gets passed along. How do you know this whole thing isn't just made up by someone with an ax to grind against this particular neighbor? If your children are approached, by all means take appropriate measures, but consider what you may be doing to someone's life with such preemptive hostility.

palimpsest is completely correct about the problems with the sex-offender registry. While on the one hand it can be an extremely useful resource, it's also misused/overused. For instance, in many states a young man can be tossed into jail (and onto the sex offender registry for life) as a "child molester" for having fully-consensual sex with his 16 year old girlfriend the day after he turns 18, even if they have been together for years. The conviction for which someone has been placed on the registry is public record in most states, and rather than just assume someone is a rapist or a pedophile you could actually check them out.

I wrote: "Some of the most "unsavory characters" I have ever encountered were clean-cut, heterosexual, married-with-children, ostentatiously churchgoing, business-owning, run-for-town-office "pillars of the community" - who were also engaging in such admirable behaviors like bigotry, lying, cheating on their partners, theft/embezzlement, substance abuse, physical/emotional/sexual abuse of their partners and/or children, and general all-around-scumbaggery..."

to which organic_bama_mama responds: "Did all of these people tell you in person about their sins, Johnmari, or have you been doing a little gossiping of your own lately?"

Well, while I have had personal acquaintance with too many examples of this particular flavor of jerk, there's also this strange thing called "law enforcement investigation" where certain people go and find this weird stuff called "evidence", which can eventually become something called "court documentation" and is then available to these exotic creatures called "journalists" (as opposed to the talking bobbleheads on TV)... I think you've probably heard of that?

"And what exactly do you personally know of Tommy Lee's endowment, hmmmmm?"

Oh, I don't know, how about a little movie called "Pam & Tommy Lee: Stolen Honeymoon"? You'd pretty much have to have been living under a rock ten years ago not to know of its existence, although perhaps not its specific title. (It's a really stupid movie, even for that particular genre, so I will admit that I did not watch the entire thing.) Wouldn't want to have any more up-close-and-personal contact with that monstrosity though - contrary to common masculine belief, there's definitely such a thing as TOO big! :-)

" For some reason on these threads, thinly veiled bigotry against the religious is tolerated while politically correct tolerance of much that I find abhorrent is fully expected."

"The religious", huh? LOL! Don't suppose it might occur to you that I might be devoutly religious - it just doesn't happen to be YOUR flavor of religion.

RIP is correct in that between 90 and 95% of child molestations are done by a person known to the child, and usually by someone in a position of authority (real or perceived) over that child. Same goes for abductions - abductions by people not known to the child are quite rare. So really, it isn't those strangers you should be keeping an eagle eye on, huh?

Kudos to johnmari and others for bringing some common sense and maturity to this discussion.

I understand you to be religious Johnmari, and while I don't agree with you, I completely support a tolerance here towards all religions and hope no one will take potshots at your expense.

Here in SC, the sex offender map, which I like best, familywatchdog, does list what the specific crimes are: sex with a minor under 10, for instance and how many convictions. The pictures of most of these people are seriously creepy.

Now we're being told to take the sex offender registry in stride? Wow. Realllly bad advice, at best.

In my "day job" I teach/have taught, treat/have treated a number of people in the sex business. I am currently teaching a former prostitute (I know this because before she applied to the progam she needed to find out if her record would prevent her future certification/licensure.)
I treat a couple of patients who are/have been escorts and/or porn actors.

I think the woman I am teaching was young enough that she was a victim of her circumstances. The escorts and porn actors I think are pretty much doing this with their eyes open. (The men in particular: "I figured I might as well get paid for doing what I was doing all the time anyway")

I don't understand it, I don't know the psychology that led them to this choice, but from my general interactions they seem no more or less evil, dishonest or maladjusted than anyone else in the population I treat.

I particularly have to confront some of my biases about this with the woman I am teaching...it seems so "uncharacteristic" of who she is now...but what is characteristic of an ex-prostitute? Who knows? I don't.

I don't think that anyone is saying the registry is just something to be taken in stride. However, the registry is flawed, and there are individuals on the registry who are not a threat to children in particular or society in general. As J-M said, boys convicted of statutory rape when they turn 18 or 19, turned in by some girl's angry parent; convictions that are clearly related to horrendous divorce or separation proceedings (male and female, I am not condoning spousal abuse); indecent exposure related to repeated, drunken stupidity on college campuses. There is no registry that I know of that indicates that your neighbor is a drug dealer, has defrauded people out of money, etc. I don't I need to know if my neighbor was arrested for buying a prostitute. I do need to know if he would be a danger to my children.

WRT the registry, as Mari said: The conviction for which someone has been placed on the registry is public record in most states, and rather than just assume someone is a rapist or a pedophile you could actually check them out.

"Check them out" being imperative in some situations where the registry is used. Offender lists I've seen also list the specific conviction. But if verification is needed, there are easy enough ways to obtain it, e.g. court dockets accessible online.

I utilize that registry often when renting a house. Check out applicants but also to keep informed on the area, particularly if a family with children should want to move in. But if I utilize that registry, I have to be very careful. It's a very gray area, the law with regard to a landlord's responsibility (or liability) as far as how much that registry factors into a rental scenario. Only once have I encountered a situation where I deliberately pointed out someone on the registry. A family with a preschool aged daughter moved into a house and at the same time a registered offender (convicted of a crime against a minor child ) lived within a short radius, about 8 blocks away. Since the rental house sits on a main pedestrian/vehicle artery, there was no doubt if the offender went for food, gas, the bank, either in a car or on foot, he would have to pass the rental house to get there. So I informed the parents of the offender's presence before lease signing. Also informed them of where to go to check our local registry. (They were aware of the registry, but being preoccupied with job/house change, had not checked it.) Being fully informed as far as available information went, they were appreciative, moved in with eyes wide open on the matter, and that was that.

My point is there are vastly different ways that people can land on that registry, and if one is going to utilize the information, it's important to check the facts. Especially when it comes to housing issues. Cases do land in court over how it has been used against someone seeking housing -or- not pointed out and then something bad happens. The college kid who got smashed, closed the bar at 2 a.m., went into a dark alley, whizzed on the side of a building and got busted for public exposure is not the same as the 45 yr old guy who commits a crime of a sexual nature against a minor child.

Also it's important to not assume just because someone isn't on the registry that they are necessarily safe - they may not have gotten caught. IMO the registry creates a false sense of security, making people think they know who the dangerous ones are when they are really fearing boys who had sex with their underage girlfriends and stupid things like that, who are no danger to anyone - while you assume Uncle John is safe - when you are far more likely to have a problem with Uncle John than you are with Randy Andy who was getting it on with his girlfriend and then turned 18.

Palimpsest has narrowed this conversation to the core question: are people in the sex trade any more dangerous, evil, or maladjusted than other people?

PLease excuse any grammatical or composition errors here. I have a cold you see and the thought of a group of guys in pastel velour suits slapping each other with rubber chickens and singing quartets makes me laugh which of course makes me cough. Ahh, what a sight.

Okay, I think that your children are fortunate to have a mother so concerned about them. As parents it is our job to help our children to balance the reality of you never what could happen with trying to get on with a normal, adjusted life. I would use this opportunity as a reminder that we honestly have no idea of who lives in our neighborhoods, period. There could be a lot of creepy things happening in a lot of homes. One lady across the street kept pigeons in her house and their carcasses when they died. EWWWW! But to stay focused this a could time to talk about whose house they are and are not allowed to play at, keeping a safe distance from cars that come through the neighborhood, only going with people who have the secret password that should be used only sparingly.

I probably would not worry about this neighbor too terribly much. While their sexual proclivities may not be my thing, they are seeking an appropriate and legal outlet for their tastes. I am far more worried about the people in children's lives who should love and care for them but betray them in such horrible ways.

Johnmari...you crack me up :) You are 100% spot on (and that thing was a monster LOL)

I can just see the phone call....911...my neighbors might be having sex!!!! (News story at 8).

If you're really worried, check out the odds...having catholic priests over is probably a lot more danger to your boys than having a gay man in the neighborhood. If anything, I'd advise you to tell the busy body who told you about the add to keep their important information (ie gossip) to themselves.

And for the record, I have a child and can clearly say that I'd leave my son with a gay man in a second (heck we're adopting our left over embryo's out to gay couples and older couples)...but would never leave a child of mine alone with a catholic priest nor with religious zealots! They always turn out to be the real creap that lives next door!

igloo, she is talking about a gay man that just so happens to posting sexually explicit photos of himself on the internet. You would leave your son with him?? Maybe you would.

And, by the way, those catholic priests you talk about are mostly gay men. They knew they could convince younger kids not to say anything.

No, olliesmom, those priests are pedophiles and criminals, not "gay men" and for the record, the overwhelming majority of pedophiles are straight men and as noted by previous posters, the overwhelming majority of child sexual abuse is by a trusted family member, friend or person in authority, not strangers.

sandyponder

Exactly, Sandy. Thank you, and thanks to all of the other posters who have been a voice of reason in this thread. I cringe when I see some sort of correlation trying to be drawn between "gay men" and "pedophiles" - as was done above with the comment about priests. That only furthers erroneous stereotypes, and erroneous stereotypes only further the hatred and violence borne of ignorance. I have both friends and family who are "out and proud" with their homosexuality, and I applaud them. These are dear, kind, wonderful human beings who continue to be vilified by far too many because of who they love and how they express their love. Live your own life, people ... and have the decency to allow others to do the same.

Speaking as a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, I can attest that abusers are usually trusted family members. Not the flamboyant neighbor or the guy with greasy hair and tatoos.

To say a gay man who has sex with other consenting adults (that he maybe does not know so well) is not safe to be left with a boy is like saying your (theoretical) brother-in-law who hooks up with adult women at the local bar is not safe with your eleven year old daughter. I don't buy it, sorry.

You guys need to take this to the other side! This has gotten out of hand, and people are getting all excited about it!

I shouldn't even have posted anything about it, it is a much deeper subject than what I am willing to put my time and research in.

I don't post LONG posts, like some of you who have have the extra time. I like to take a break from time to time (to look on here), from the business we run and PTA at my son's school and going back to school myself, as I have lots of research papers to write on computer.

I like to post on more light-hearted subjects. So, you guys who "like" to argue my every statement, have fun!!

But, olliesmom, I would suggest that you DO put time and research into this, because of the ramifications that these "misunderstandings"--to put it mildly--can have on other human beings. To identify pedophile priests who prey on young boys as "gay men" is the same as villifying pedophile priests who prey on young girls as "heterosexual men." Would you do that in those cases?

Whoa - hold on a minute, Olliesmom. You post five times in this thread, and then when it (obviously) gets a bit uncomfortable when others come back to you with a different point of view, you tell us to take it elsewhere? That's not how it works, my friend. If you can't defend your own opinions, then simply don't post them. It's not difficult to see through your last post about being so busy you don't have time to waste here posting about not-so-lighthearted topics.

Ummm. . . do you even know if these encounters take place at his home? It's not my lifestyle, but I would think that if I were looking to hook up with strangers, I would be in a hotel -- not in my own home.

"To say a gay man who has sex with other consenting adults (that he maybe does not know so well) is not safe to be left with a boy is like saying your (theoretical) brother-in-law who hooks up with adult women at the local bar is not safe with your eleven year old daughter. I don't buy it, sorry."

That has always been my argument. It makes perfect sense.

Apples to apples, people.

I am a primary healthcare provider, and my ability to post multiple times (long or short) has more to do with the vagaries of my schedule rather than my "hav[ing] the extra time". :)

I work in two private practices, a medically complex (incl. HIV) patient care clinic, and a teaching clinic where we see primarily public health patients (for free)--and I teach a lecture. And do interior design on the side. So much for extra time.

I am actually rather puritanical about sex deep down but due to my work experience and learning health histories, I have accumulated a certain amount of "second hand" information.

I see the original post as a privacy issue. Is the internet private? No. However, to get to this particular part of the website you have to click on the forum itself, then to get to the individual posts you *have *to *click * a * box * that *says * you * are * not * offended *by * the *things * you *will *see *there. (And you still have to opportunity to have something flagged as inappropriate within that context).

So by clicking on that box, you are telling an untruth, if you ARE offended by it. And you have taken multiple steps to get there. It is layered in such a way that you will NOT find a picture of your neighbor's yoo-hoo by accident.

Do I think your neighbor is crazy for Posting a picture of his or her face and genitalia on the web? Sure do. Do I think it is a dangerous lifestyle if you are going to be hooking up with near strangers? Yep, yep. (I had a patient who was murdered most likely during a sexual encounter--and it was NOT one of my HIV clinic patients either).

However, I think adults should be able to make decisions--- that do not affect the non participants--- with free will.

is this still going on?

This was 2009