Thank you all for the wonderful wishes! Cliff and I have very much enjoyed reading all of them! And he, like I did, thought it was a wonderfully amazing thing that you all thought to do this for me! Updates- JJ's graduation went off wonderfully. My first ex-husband and his wife came up for it and are now (thankfully) gone back home. My foster daughter, Charlene, who is actually his sister that I've raised for 21 years, decided to move back with them to be nearer her mother, who's in bad health. It was rough, but I know she'll be happier. :) Wedding plans- Well, this week I'm cooking the food- grilled chicken, potato salad, the cakes. Other family members are handling the brisket, BBQ sauces, baked beans and coleslaw and drinks. So, for the rest of this week, I'll be mostly MIA. Everything is going wonderfully! It's all coming together, aside for the 30 % chance of rain they're calling for :( So, everyone keep your fingers crossed! 70 people in my almost mother in law's house would be a tight fit despite that it's a large house! Neither Cliff nor I are having any nerves. We're both getting really excited, which we didn't really expect because we already consider ourselves married :) I have a few last minute errands to do, like finding my 10 yr old's cowboy boots. Oddly, I'm having trouble finding a youth size 5 for him- in Oklahoma! We're testing the hairstyle I've chosen tomorrow :) Family members are starting to make it in. Cliff's sister Heather and her husband got here Sunday and I finally got to meet the woman I've been emailing and IMing with for the last few months. We're going to be really good friends, I think :) We'll be at Cliff's Mom's friday to get the bulk of the decorations done, then everyone's going out for a combined party, to have a few drinks and enjoy adult time without children. It's gonna be an early night so that we can all be up early Saturday to put the finishing touches on the decorations. Four more days! Oh, and my email is changing! It will be kathyl.walker@yahoo.com For those that keep that on record. I'll continue checking the kathyrankin@yahoo.com one for a while, though :) Kathy

I have used starphire (low iron) glass in my showers. Regular (green tint) glass and starphire are night and day difference! Regular glass casts a green tint especially as you go with 3/8" or thicker glass. This negates the expense you put in buying and installing the perfect tile and colors! I have a sample of 1/2" showerguard with low iron glass sitting at my desk as I type. Once you have seen starphire you will see the difference, it is quite striking.

I agree with the above suggestions. I would probably skip the games since there will be other older women (i.e. her friends) there who have seen and played them all a million times by now. Otherwise, pick just one that doesn't require a lot of physical coordination or excellent memory, cause embarrassment, or seem too youthful (you want the older guests to feel comfortable and not frustrated with any limitations they might have). I'm not trying to suggest that all older people experience these limitations, but many do so it would be thoughtful to consider their needs and preferences. My mom is in her early 70s and in good health but is starting to feel frustrated by things that required too much of a mental challenge, so that's why I thought of this. In my opinion, the emphasis of the shower should be a celebration of her new life and new marriage, rather than showering her with lots of gifts as if to start a new home. At her age, the accumulation of lots of stuff may be overwhelming. The gift certificates are a great idea. Or perhaps a pair of nice pillow cases, or new towels to replace old ones... new kitchen towels and potholders... things that wear out and are often replaced through the years would be nice. I love the idea of a tea with sandwiches and nice china. Have some nice classical music playing in the background at a low volume. A pretty floral centerpiece in her favorite colors and simple decorations would be taseful for this occasion. If you want to give a favor to each guest, a vanilla candle wrapped in tulle or another neutral scent would be suitable for almost everyone. Or a tiny vase. I saw some very small vases last night at Target for just a couple of dollars; they were near the frames section and were all shapes and sizes. The small ones were a couple of inches tall. You could tie a small ribbon around the neck in a color that matches the other colors or her wedding colors. Best wishes for a lovely party! Jen

We got two gifts in total. A vacuum cleaner and a pressure cooker. Both most welcome and the pc is still in use. No ’shower’ and only 8 wedding guests. Just parents, siblings and their spouses. DD got married during covid with the permitted 6 guests but a year later we had a party with 100 guests. They requested no gifts, just donations to two charities. The Italian side of the family found this diffcult to grasp and gave a lot of knickknacks they neither want nor need.